T Nation

Pasta Diet


#1

This just hit my inbox. It was too good to not pass on...

The medical studies are right on point.

The Pasta Diet

1) You walka pasta da bakery.
2) You walka pasta da candy store.
3) You walka pasta da Ice Cream shop.
4) You walka pasta da table and fridge.

And for those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health.
It's a relief to know the truth after all the conflicting medical studies:

  1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

  2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

  3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

  4. The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

  5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausage and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like.
Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

RB


#2

UK and US rates for conditions like heart disease are much more similar than any non English speaking country compared to UK or US. Must be something in the speaking English thing.


#3

Good thing I doesn't do it so good. Hopefully that will reduce my risk.


#4

Do you think that the number of people on this site that come from English speaking countries yet have no grasp on how to use the language correctly will still have a reduced chance of heart attack?

I seriously hope that I didn't fuck up my english in this post.


#5

Most people from England have no grasp how to use the language.


#6

All the aforementioned countries' lifestyles differ vastly from ours. I believe that Americans' health disparities are based upon our commericalized, processed, sedentary lifestyles.

-For one, the majority of Asians and Europeans walk or bike everywhere; Americans will drive our BMW's one block to the grocery store to pick up a gallon of milk. The cumulative effects of the exercise or lack of exercise, I believe, has a big effect on our health statuses.

-Portion sizes are much different. Americans tend to supersize and have portion distortion.

-The American diet consists of much more processed foods, processed white flour/white carb products, processed sugar products, than that of europeans and asians. Many Americans practically live on commercialized food products-- hot pockets, tubecake, McDonald's, donuts, etc. Yuck.

-P.S. I HAVE TO say this. I HATE donuts. I think they are the foulest (truly non-)food on the face of this earth. The mere site of them makes me hurl. I've even seen someone eating donuts and bacon, BARF! And I'm an ER Nurse, so donuts are ALWAYS in our break room. When I come onto shift and find a partially finished mega box of the "donut variety pack", I throw it into the trash. I have gotten asked not to do this, but I have a donut vendetta. DONUTS ARE DISGUSTING. WALK PASTA DONUTS!!!!!