It is much easier for me to ques neurotypes of man than woman. What neurotype can be woman which:
I know these are not your regular cues, so how to approach it from neurobiological standpoint?
See a psychiatrist?
Neurotype = Wife
That sounds like high glutamate. And glutamate receptors are make more sensitive because of estrogen. It sounds like a 2B that is emplified.
Hilarious! 
As my understanding deepens, this woman was actually 1A: attacks when anxious, externalize stress, domineering (gain status by gossip - woman style), ambitious, center of general attention.
2B woman are much more manageable for me: very scared to be unloved, lonely, troubles saying No, easy to gaslight them, will rather listen to you and hate you just internally, want loving attention just by small group of loved ones. They are emotional too, but target the hate towards themselves.
1A woman with high estrogen are more hystrionic. They will create a public drama and not care about opinions of others (lower agreeableness), where 2B woman have higher agreeableness.