if he’s robbing you all blind , theres an underlying reason somewhere . remove him from your life ; if the other family members cant be that straight forward , thats their problem .
I went through the same shit with my brother a while back . we dont speak anymore . my dad doesnt speak to him anymore…nor my sister . my brothers wife had an Oxy/crack problem…she just started her 3 year stay with the State .
if you continue helping , he will continue needing help . if you let him steal from you , he will . only detox ,prison , or death ends the problem . the test results dont really matter
When someone stops using, you dont need a drug test to tell. Money stops disappearing, wildly erratic behavior and mood swings stop, as do 3 hour trips to ‘go grab cigarettes’, and weekly if not daily ‘flu symptoms’ disappear as well. Opiates have a short half life, and usually are undetectable by UA in about 3 days, maybe more for oxycontin b/c of its extended release characteristic.
In my experience even if you catch the person, you can really do nothing of consequence anyway short of cutting them off from whatever they may be relying on you for if you havent already. Dont believe that ‘intervention’ bullshit.
Nobody gets clean until they get their ass handed to them enough times that they decide they want something better for themselves, they get locked up, or die. I chased a dope habit from about 17-23, and thank God I got out of the game early. Im clean over 6 years now. I had legal, health, and family problems and none of it mattered until I wanted it for myself. Good luck man.
EDIT-He may want to look into drug regimens to ‘kick’. Methadone is antiquated, evil, and there are better alternatives out there. Syboxin (Suboxon) is perscribed by most MD’s now and is helpful at easing the withdrawl symptoms. Those drugs are good for getting them out of the vicious cycle of opiate addiction (get money, get drugs, repeat or get sick), and also removes the get sick excuse from the equation. So if the guy has a full script of syboxin, and is still getting high, you know hes not ready. Follow me? sorry for the long post, but this shit hits home for me, pm me if you have any problems or questions.
In my experience even if you catch the person, you can really do nothing of consequence anyway short of cutting them off from whatever they may be relying on you for if you havent already. Dont believe that ‘intervention’ bullshit.
[/quote]
That’s the whole point of an intervention - get help or get nothing. Anyway, maybe check out Al-Anon for those who can’t cut the guy off or yourself.
As others have said, he has to want to stop himself. Whether that’s absolute rock bottom, prison, whatever. Opiates are nasty shit to get addicted to and oxycontin could probably be the worst next to heroin (especially if he is snorting/injecting it.)
Opiates inspire some incredibly powerful feelings in users and it could be argued that the body “needs” opioids in some form in order to survive (whether endogenous or exogenous.)
I’m not going to suggest any course of action, as that is many times a case-by-case basis, and I’m in no position to offer such advice. I hope this info helped though, to know what your dealing with.
We are taking “action” to an extent. To the extent that we can keep ouselves from going down with him.
Changed locks, added locks, trying to shut off his support system which unfortunately has been rather tough.
It’s coming down to worrying if the “You can’t come over, and can’t see my kids anymore” confrontation will send him over the edge. The edge that comes when you decide you’ve fucked up beyond help and you need to end it all.
It’s that serious.
Thanks for helping everyone, it’s so pervasive today, this may help others.
This is a tough situation. Having gone through this on his side, I can tell you that he needs to hit bottom, and just because he’s lost all those things, doesn’t mean he’s done so, yet. You’re doing the right thing by changing your locks and such, but really making him take a UA isn’t going to do anybody any good. What will it prove if you already know he’s using and he sure as hell knows. You just have to be there for him when he realized he needs help. Otherwise, I’m sorry to say there’s nothing you can do besides love the guy. I hope this helps.
Josh