I used to be so shy as a kid that my parents suspected I was autistic + I’d often get stuck in some situations and NEVER ask for help and it even says on some of my school reports + my Apprenticeship portfolio that I was assessed as needing ‘assisted social support’. I also didn’t even kiss a girl till I was 20 and have had a huge amount of life problems linked to my old shy self.
Funny thing is though I overcame most of that, partly through slowly pushing myself to do stuff I used to feel uncomfortable with and partly through the realisation that most people don’t really give a shit if you say something a bit daft or awkward etc. It’s only when you consistently, socially fuck up that you have a problem which may need to be addressed through some form of therapy etc.
Over the years I’ve read plenty of advice about how to become confident & I can’t help think at least maybe a third of it is basically BS. Joining Toastmasters is often the advice I’ve heard time and time again…problem with that kind of advice though is that it’s pretty one-dimensional. Joining TM’s might work amazingly well for a person who is afraid of public speaking but confidence IME is very situational.
The best way to overcome shyness IME is to use a multi-pronged approach, make a list of ten things that scare you (starting with the least scary) and do them over and over again until nothing on that list scares you any more.
So, whaddya think? What has or hasn’t worked for you or others you know, thoughts?