I am a 22 year old guy, I have been training for around 6-7 years now, and I currently feel like I’m stuck at a point where I feel completely worn down. I used to struggle with being obsessive about the gym, my body image, and food - however, when I went away to university, I began to build a much healthier relationship with everything and felt I found Balance with my life. However, I have now finished Uni, and find my self in a bit of a transitional period, where I am back to living at home. I feel this has triggered me to become really obsessive about everything again, and this time it has hit me HARD.
I have recently been working out more and more, (weights 5 x per week for 2 hours + 2 x cardio per week), and have been getting super abxious/angry if anyone trys to stop me from going. I have also been trying to gain size, so have been eating more, but have been truly obsessing about weighing everything every single day , and terrifying myself that I will get fat - taking pictures and looking at myself in the mirror and over analysing everything every single day. I have been sleeping really poorly the last few weeks, and I have still been forcing myself to follow my programme, even if it means getting up at 4am before work. All in all, I feel all of this together is adding up to absolutely destroy my psyche and my relationships with my family. I am miserable all the time, and I know it and I feel so bad about it because I just don’t want to talk to anyone. I feel so unhappy and stuck in this cycle of doing more and more, and analysing everything. I just need to break the cycle
I feel it might be because I am back at home so I don’t really have much of a routine or purpose like I did at university. But all I know is I began going to the gym and exercising to feel better about myself, but at the moment I feel I am just destroying myself.
If anyone can please help me or give me some advice I would appreciate it so so much. I feel completely lost and feel like I just need to hit ‘reset’. I wish I could be back feeling happy and balanced instead of having all of these unhealthy habits.
I look forward to any responses