T Nation

OK To Tell Kids They're Fat?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/13675790/

I don’t see anything wrong with telling kids the truth.

~V

Is that referring to hyper/polyphagia or other eating disorders?

I wouldn’t nesc. approach it as “your fat”. With my nephew I appraoched it as "Your getting out of shape, don’t you want to be able to keep up with other 8 yr olds; don’t you still want to be like Non’c Byron (thats me & he likes to follow me to my gym) (he was 110 on a solid frame but you could see it was taking a toll on him, fatigued, picked on; which was rather ironic because when I went to school to watch him try out for the fitness meet for his age group; 75% the kids were fat, same ones picking on him)

Well it’s sorta funny now, he’s 95-97lbs. with some cuts, you can see his arms/shoulders grew.

For training it’s stuff like pullups/dips, handstand push ups (I hold his legs while he does them) squats/deadlifts with bands. The only reason I have’nt let him touch a barbell or dumbell is because his mother (my sister in law griped when I let him an he was sore from squats)

Anyway on a side note; he came in second in the fitness meets (it’s mainly track an relay) & he is 9 now.

In middle school he says he is looking foward into trying out for the JR. Track Team an giving ShotPut a try.Anyone know what weight that is used in middle school ShotPut? I was thinking of investing in a few for him to start practicing.

O.K. This sorta got off topic, but in the end, I wouldn’t say call the kid FAT, Maybe just try and get a kid started in some sorta activity before he gets “TOO FAT” and the weight gets out of hand.

[quote]Obese “sounds mean. It doesn’t sound good,” said Trisha Leu, 17, who thinks the proposed change is a bad idea.

The Wheeling, Ill., teen has lost 60 pounds since March as part of an adolescent obesity surgery study at the University of Illinois at Chicago.

“When you’re young, you don’t understand what obese means,” Leu said. “I still don’t understand it.”[/quote]

Gee, Leu was not only obese, but she isn’t too bright either.

first of all, how old are your kids? Really, it doesn’t even matter because If they aren’t old enough to be controlling their diet, then their “fatness” is all your fault, unless kids at school are giving them candy bars all day or you’re not supervising them.

If they ARE old enough to control their diet, they know whether they’re fat or not and can make they’re own choices. In fact, they probably know if they’re fat at any age cuz kids make fun, only fat kids can’t do much about it cuz they have the kind of parents who don’t feed them properly or don’t discipline properly.

Maybe some of these parents are wondering if its ok to tell their kids they’re fat?

[quote]allNatural wrote:
first of all, how old are your kids? Really, it doesn’t even matter because If they aren’t old enough to be controlling their diet, then their “fatness” is all your fault, unless kids at school are giving them candy bars all day or you’re not supervising them.

If they ARE old enough to control their diet, they know whether they’re fat or not and can make they’re own choices. In fact, they probably know if they’re fat at any age cuz kids make fun, only fat kids can’t do much about it cuz they have the kind of parents who don’t feed them properly or don’t discipline properly.

Maybe some of these parents are wondering if its ok to tell their kids they’re fat? [/quote]

I was waiting for the hospital cefateria to open for lunch last week and there were two fat kids (obviously brothers possibly 10 and 12 years of age) waiting at the door. By “fat” I mean two chins and a sizeable belly going on and would be labeled as just north of “husky” even 10 years ago.

They looked inside the window of the cafeteria and saw one of the VERY heavy set ladies who sets the food out. They then made a joke about how she must be hungry and that’s why she hadn’t opened the doors yet. This surprised me coming from two fat kids.

When I was in high school, I remember maybe 3 fat kids in the whole school. One of them lost weight by senior year. Today, half of the class or more is fat. Who is going to make fun of fat kids if all of them are fat?

What qualified as “fat” years ago is now considered “healthy” or normal by these parents. Apparently, there are quite a few fat kids who don’t know they’re fat.

[quote]Professor X wrote:
allNatural wrote:
first of all, how old are your kids? Really, it doesn’t even matter because If they aren’t old enough to be controlling their diet, then their “fatness” is all your fault, unless kids at school are giving them candy bars all day or you’re not supervising them.

If they ARE old enough to control their diet, they know whether they’re fat or not and can make they’re own choices. In fact, they probably know if they’re fat at any age cuz kids make fun, only fat kids can’t do much about it cuz they have the kind of parents who don’t feed them properly or don’t discipline properly.

Maybe some of these parents are wondering if its ok to tell their kids they’re fat?

I was waiting for the hospital cefateria to open for lunch last week and there were two fat kids (obviously brothers possibly 10 and 12 years of age) waiting at the door. By “fat” I mean two chins and a sizeable belly going on and would be labeled as just north of “husky” even 10 years ago.

They looked inside the window of the cafeteria and saw one of the VERY heavy set ladies who sets the food out. They then made a joke about how she must be hungry and that’s why she hadn’t opened the doors yet. This surprised me coming from two fat kids.

When I was in high school, I remember maybe 3 fat kids in the whole school. One of them lost weight by senior year. Today, half of the class or more is fat. Who is going to make fun of fat kids if all of them are fat?

What qualified as “fat” years ago is now considered “healthy” or normal by these parents. Apparently, there are quite a few fat kids who don’t know they’re fat.[/quote]

Those 2 kids probably get made fun of at school (maybe everyone makes fun of everyone and they all know they’re fat) and are projecting it on someone they think is “fat” by their banned together (acceptable) standards.

On another note, are people getting stupider? Everywhere I look, I see obese ppl as if they have no fuckin clue or care in the world about their health. funfact: IQ and obesity are inversely related.

Back on the subject, i remember when i was like 4, I was trying on clothes to buy and my dad told me i was getting fat. i was only like 4 and it kinda hurt and probably why i remember it. If I could go back to then with my current mind i would say, who’s fault is THAT? Kids of all ages aren’t going to turn down fast food everyday (my case), and if they’re whining and begging for it, its the parents resposibility to say no. So yea, get your kids fat, and then tell them that they’re fat.

[quote]Professor X wrote:
Obese “sounds mean. It doesn’t sound good,” said Trisha Leu, 17, who thinks the proposed change is a bad idea.

The Wheeling, Ill., teen has lost 60 pounds since March as part of an adolescent obesity surgery study at the University of Illinois at Chicago.

“When you’re young, you don’t understand what obese means,” Leu said. “I still don’t understand it.”

Gee, Leu was not only obese, but she isn’t too bright either.[/quote]

I’m taking 2-1 that she wasn’t saying “obese”, but “O-beast”. takers?

Right. So we stop telling kids that they’re obese because its hurtful to hear. That being so can we in turn start creating euphemisms for the diseases that accompany obesity? Like when a fat kid develops type II diabetes we call it something like ‘sugar no-like’ or something equally easy on the ears to avoid damaging their feelings?
This whole thing strikes me as similar to schools not using red pens to mark tests anymore because red is too stigmatizing for the student. the pussification of the modern child continues.

[quote]marathe wrote:
Right. So we stop telling kids that they’re obese because its hurtful to hear. That being so can we in turn start creating euphemisms for the diseases that accompany obesity? Like when a fat kid develops type II diabetes we call it something like ‘sugar no-like’ or something equally easy on the ears to avoid damaging their feelings?
This whole thing strikes me as similar to schools not using red pens to mark tests anymore because red is too stigmatizing for the student. the pussification of the modern child continues.[/quote]

agreed, but what good is telling the kids ANYthing? you tell the kids they’re fat and hurt their feelings…mission accomplished? The problem is with the parents and doctors. BOTH are too liberal in judging what’s fat, and the former are too irresponible in general to do anything about it if they knew.

[quote]APE. wrote:
In middle school he says he is looking foward into trying out for the JR. Track Team an giving ShotPut a try.Anyone know what weight that is used in middle school ShotPut? I was thinking of investing in a few for him to start practicing.[/quote]

Brother, that is the way to do it. Congratulations on being a worthwhile human being. You will change that kid’s WHOLE life… He might have grown up a fat schlep being abused by society and his wife. Instead, he’s going to find the way.

I’d suggest getting him a shotput just a wee bit heavier than the one they use in middle school competitions.

Not a lot heavier, just the next step.

That way, when he steps up to throw in middle school, he’ll just WING that fucker.

I think it helps a lot to explain to the kids what they will get from fitness in terms they can understand. Mention how it will change his standing in school in the male hierarchy that exists there… Mention how it might feel good to give one of those kids picking on him a black eye, and shut them the hell up.

Of course, that may not be the best advice to give little kids - but I think it is.

For good or for ill, if I were mentoring a young male, I would admit to him all the truths about being a male - young or old.

The male hierarchy bullshit continues on into his adulthood in the office, in the factory, at the job site… Doesn’t matter where he goes - it will always be much like highschool was…

He may as well learn how to “wait until the other guy walks in the men’s room and deal with him there” now… Cause that is the way the world seems to work - at any level.

The way I see it, is if the world is a violent place full of bullshit games, I’d rather the kid I love be the one on top.

[quote]marathe wrote:
Right. So we stop telling kids that they’re obese because its hurtful to hear. That being so can we in turn start creating euphemisms for the diseases that accompany obesity? Like when a fat kid develops type II diabetes we call it something like ‘sugar no-like’ or something equally easy on the ears to avoid damaging their feelings?
This whole thing strikes me as similar to schools not using red pens to mark tests anymore because red is too stigmatizing for the student. the pussification of the modern child continues.[/quote]

Absolutely. I totally agree.

I also think people should remember, though, that there is a difference between “letting a kid know he is fat” and “humiliating and abusing him while telling yourself it’s for his own good.”

If any of you guys “tell a kid he’s fat,” then do it in a very supportive fashion.

He will probably resist what you are saying - don’t get annoyed and irritated at that point. Just let it go.

He will think about what you ahve told him about himself and the world that is his environment.

That time bomb may not go off until he is 18.

But it will lie inside. And if you do it with love, it will be more likely to go off in a positive way.

Vivekananda had a great saying, and I am only paraphrasing:
Never say anything to make anyone feel worse about themselves - it will only deepen the intensity of their bad habits.

This is oh-so-true.

Everything good I’ve done for myself has grown from a root. That root was the love that was given to me.

Most kids know they’re fat.

[quote]wires wrote:

If any of you guys “tell a kid he’s fat,” then do it in a very supportive fashion.
[/quote]

I like to roll down the window as i drive by and scream LOOSE SOME WEIGHT FAT ASS!

or

throw weight watchers snacks at them.

j/k :slight_smile:

[quote]blitzkrg wrote:
wires wrote:

If any of you guys “tell a kid he’s fat,” then do it in a very supportive fashion.

I like to roll down the window as i drive by and scream LOOSE SOME WEIGHT FAT ASS!

or

throw weight watchers snacks at them.

j/k :)[/quote]

This is a tricky subject, if you yell at a fat kid (coming from experience) it will make him feel bad. BUT I think the true problem is the parents responce. If the parent comforts the child and tells him/her its ok to be big , love yourself ect. the kid follows the parents advice to find they only get fatter and miserable. So i think the parents should approach the children with a positive attitude and try to help them change their ways before it becomes too late, if that means to light a spark under their ass and flat out tell them the truth, then so be it. The kid will be thankful someday

i was fat when i was like 10. i oviously knew i was fat. i think all kids who they are but are jsut too lazy to do anything about it. so many people are fat these days its ridiculous. i think parents and doctors should tell kids there fat. when i was little my parents never told me i was fat. but if i ever got them really pissed off or something theyd like call me a fatass lol.

Lois: Peter, where’s Chris?

Security Guard: All right son, I’m going to need those two hams back.

Chris: I… I don’t have any hams.

Security Guard: Lift up your shirt son.

Chris: I need an adult. I need an adult.

Security Guard: You’re not a shoplifter, you’re just a fat kid. Sorry about that fatty, fat, fatty. Hey Tom, he’s just a fat kid. Aren’t ya fatty? He’s a big ol’ fat kid. Here’s some chocolate fatso.

Chris: Thanks.

[quote]montini1 wrote:
blitzkrg wrote:
wires wrote:

If any of you guys “tell a kid he’s fat,” then do it in a very supportive fashion.

I like to roll down the window as i drive by and scream LOOSE SOME WEIGHT FAT ASS!

or

throw weight watchers snacks at them.

j/k :slight_smile:

This is a tricky subject, if you yell at a fat kid (coming from experience) it will make him feel bad. BUT I think the true problem is the parents responce. If the parent comforts the child and tells him/her its ok to be big , love yourself ect. the kid follows the parents advice to find they only get fatter and miserable. So i think the parents should approach the children with a positive attitude and try to help them change their ways before it becomes too late, if that means to light a spark under their ass and flat out tell them the truth, then so be it. The kid will be thankful someday [/quote]

ahahah i was just kiddin… i dont throw stones… i still have a lot of weight to loose myself…
but i’m -32lbs and counting…
when i loose another 30, then maybe i’ll make fun of fat people… (ahhaha still j/k)

There’s a girl in my school who weighs 250lbs (her friend told me) makes fun of this girl who weighs probably 170lbs at the same height for being FAT! It makes me wonder if people actually realize how fat they are.

While we’re somewhat on the subject, it really bothers me how fat parents of fat children make parents who restrict fast food and soda from their kids out to be terrible parents. The ideas of fatness are starting to shift… fat people are normal sized and people who are “fit” are called “anorexic”.

It’s just a stigmatized word. It’s like telling someone they’re tall. Is this an insult unto itself? No. But if you tell someone they’re tall constantly, they’re bound to get pissed off. It’s one thing to tell someone the truth, it’s another to hold it against them.