Aren’t we going with the scenario of a young adult working, saving money, and having a life until enough is saved on a down payment for a home of his or her own and/or until marriage? There are many people who’ve done that.
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I don’t have a statistic as to what percentage of parents would tolerate this
But good parents won’t tolerate this unless the child is seriously ill (cancer, maybe has a really bad case of MS or something)
If a young adult continues living with their parents, there is somewhat of an obligatory contract that deviates from the status quo of the relationship a child had with their parents as a minor/while they were still in school.
With my parents it’s something along the lines of
- you need to study. If you aren’t studying full time and/or are on holidays, get a job because you can’t sit at home and rot.
- continuation of chores that you probably did as a kid. However now there’s more work… so generally that means you might be in charge of taking out the trash whenever necessary, cleaning up for everyone after a meal has been consumed, running errands, mowing lawn etc.
- maybe you have to pay rent… maybe you don’t… depends on the parent
I don’t know any normal kids whose parents just let their child live at home to play video games and do nothing… the caveat exists for kids with serious disabilities i.e a kid on the autism spectrum who dropped out of school and has tremendous difficulty coping with the outside world.
It’s not common… parents usually do have unbridled love for their child, but not to the point of willingly facilitating a dynamic that eventuates with their child amounting to nothing.
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Shhhhhhh!
You could OFFEND someone!
God forbid someone was to think twice before ordering that second bucket of KFC wicked wings! That’s unacceptable!
I know quite a few (about 5) from work and its sad because they are afraid to retire because of their kids…parents are their 60s
and i see it with my older brother, his 40 year old kid is a bum and a drug addict and bleeding them dry
i see it with my nieces kids in ohio, refuse to work and don’t even do any chores
and quite a few financial advisors have come out on youtube telling the parents to stop bailing out their kids
As a parent, this is the model I’m planning on executing. I want to give my kid the best possible chance at doing as well as possible.
Of course, if he joins the military and is stationed elsewhere- the door is always open when he’s served and wants to take advantage of the GI bill.
Now kids are looking at 160k in debt straight out of college at 22.
I dont want my kid to have to jump into 500-600k of debt by age 25 or so just to give the appearance of keeping up with his peers.
There are other ways to do it.
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I mean my family has this fear
But due to mounting medical issues that MAY (nor may not) become very serious and extremely costly in the decades to come. There’s also the cost of having to put my dementia riddled grandmother in a decent nursing home (VERY expensive here).
I figure I can always opt for euthanasia overseas if god forbid it gets so bad that I’m bankrupting the family as I wouldn’t want to be around if I couldn’t get out of bed or leave the house for the rest of my years.
If your brother is a drug addict and he is bankrupting your family… I extend my sympathies
MOST parents would eventually come to turns with having to distance themselves from a child who is a destructive addict. They’ll try help if they can provided their child wants help (rehabilitation etc). Once again… I can’t provide stats… but it’s kind of a ‘given’.
A parent doesn’t have a choice if their child is shooting up, stealing, manipulating, lying and cheating. Cutting a child off/out is a serious decision that shouldn’t be made lightly… I’m not qualified to comment on what the correct protocol to enact is here.
But I don’t think it’s normal for a parent to accept that their child is a hardcore addict. Especially when the ‘child’ is FORTY
I don’t know any parents who have been fine with their child becoming an addict with the exception of parents who were heavily into drugs themselves.
In my opinion, the best way is getting a full ride scholarship and going straight to college after graduating high-school.
Given the kid doesn’t study a goofball low paying major, they’ll be able to conquer the world.
Highly competitive environment. Not everyone can get a full ride scholarship.
Not everyone is a D2-1 athlete, not everyone is cut out for academic brilliance
Full ride scholarship is a dynamic cut out for talented individuals. Not the average John or Jane Doe.
Those are actually a bit unusual. My nieces went to VT on partial scholarships, work and loans and are very smart & hard working. They are both kicking major ass in life now, but yeah, a full academic scholarship?
Mmm…
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I think a lot of this falls on how the parents raise their kids.
No
Athleticism is LARGELY genetic… unless you wish to force your child into hard training from a frighteningly young age as to induce an epigenetic adaptation of sorts, D1 athlete isn’t happening
We had a cross country runner who looked like a normal kid… but was running miles in under five minutes when he was in the seventh grade. For endurance he was just a genetic FREAK! My brother was a naturally good runner and did cross country. No amount of training in the world could have made my brother as good as this guy.
IQ is up to 50% or so heritable. If you are born with an IQ of 85-90… you aren’t going to be an academic superstar…
That sounds like a victim mentality to me.
Come on now. Is this real talk here or are you just being a dick?
If you’re just being a dick, im wasting my time.
What did I say that was dick-ish?
Victim mentality?
I’ll use an extreme analogy involving myself to prove my point.
I have ehlers danlos syndrome (look up what that is). I LOVE athletic endeavors. As much as I’ve always wanted to be a fighter, or a competitive bodybuilder etc… my body is just NOT cut out for that.
My body breaks down at arguably triple the rate of a normal persons. So the issues I’m complaining about now (like pain from arthritis, back pain, chronic joint pain, cardiac conduction abnormalities etc) are issues that almost unanimously impact middle aged-senior citizens.
That doesn’t mean I’ve stopped training… you’ll pry my training away from my cold, crippled fingers! Also… being sedentary leads to more rapid degeneration…
But my point is. I will never be an athlete. I can mask my symptoms with prescription drugs and whatnot, but I’ll never be able to tolerate prolonged bouts of training equitable to what a high level athlete athlete has to undergo. I know because I trained like a madman for MANY years
Trained through dislocations, stress fractures, constsnt tendonitis, joint inflammation and more. Now I’m 22 and I’ve racked up more surgeries than most rack up in a lifetime whereas a normal person who underwent my rigorous training protocol might have had one or two issues bothering them by now… I have dozens of issues… from my shoulders to my hips to my knees to my back to my fucking jaw… you name it! I always thought pain like that was normal… comes with the territory from training hard…
My condition is a GENETIC disorder… GENETICS. Thank god my case appears somewhat mild relative to others who have this…
Genetics can make or break athleticism, just as it can make or break academic potential.
I have a family friend whose wifes daughter is ‘simple’. Not retarded… but very low IQ (like bottom 2%). She will never suceed in academia… she will never suceed in life either considering she isn’t particularly charismatic, emotionally intelligent or good looking
GeNeTiCs… sorry if this sounds mean… but it’s the truth.
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So you are being a dick!
Have fun with that.
You’re right, but it’s still worth it for a kid to try.
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Try to your hearts content
But have realistic expectations
Are you studying hard? Are you one of the top in your class?
Are you one of the better athletes on your team (if D1 aspirations… are you the best?)
If not… you can try all you want, but you aren’t going to get something just because you want it.
Life is unfair, hollywood style happy endings are unrealistic.
How do you remove the absurd cost of rent? And who removes it?
Restrict landlords from charging a ridiculous amount of rent. This will be an action carried by the gov’t.
It will be a law, and whoever breaks that law should be fined or put in prison.