Ninja Training Hub

This is for all of us, who are training to become Ninjas. Post your Ninja facts here please.

PS, don’t post anything too secret, we don’t want ninja attacks on our homes because of wreckless shuriken secret leaks.

I’m an aspiring “mall ninja” and I get my wisdom from masters like this:

The Fart of a Ninja is a million times deadlier than the venom of a rattlesnake. With the right wind, a single fart can wipe out a small village.

Ninja invented skateboarding.

Only a ninja can kill a ninja. Regular humans are useless against a ninja.

Ninja never wear headbands with the word “ninja” printed on them.

Ninja can breath underwater anytime they want.

Ninja can change complete wardrobes in less than 1 second.

Ninja don’t smoke, but they do use smoke bombs.

Ninja always land on their feet. If they don’t have feet they will land on their nubs.

Ninja invented the internet. All of it.

Ninja don’t eat or drink very much, and they never have to go to the bathroom.

Ninja always move to America when making a new start as a non-assassin.

Ninja don’t play sports. Unless killing is a sport. They always win.

Ninja can crush golfballs with 2 fingers, any two fingers.

Ninja have a bad temper when they lose at anything. They will usually cut off the winners head before they have time to brag.

Ninja lie all the time. Even when the truth serves better, ninja will lie anyway.

Ninja swords are always straight with a square handle guard. Always. Curves are for girls.

Whenever a ninja masterbates people get hurt.

Me in Action:

This ninja is tricking you into thinking he is a motorcycle, as soon as you get on for a ride he will turn back into “human” ninja form, then he will beat your ass for rubbing your package on his back.