T Nation

New Conan


Here was the backup choice… fucking Twilight.

And this is my favorite line from the article. They think this guy is stacked.

“If you were looking for a physical presence, the 6â?²4â?³ Hawaiian native certainly qualifies.”

http://www.beyondhollywood.com/by-crom-stargates-jason-momoa-to-star-in-conan-reboot/

No! Conan can not have smaller arms than me! This is just silly.

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]lnname wrote:
i guess maybe the rest of the world just doesn’t care about how much muscle someone has as the people on this website…

on the otherhand this is conan we are talking about, I’m not sure if I’d be happy even if Ronnie Coleman was playing him.

The twilight generation has a lot to answer for.[/quote]

Dude, certain characters NEED to be jacked…like Superman or Conan. I feel that Hollywood is doing a disservice to the characters themselves with this bullshit.

Spiderman can get away with being smaller. They fucked up that character for far greater reasons then his muscle mass.

Batman doesn’t have to be huge, but Bale did a great job in the first movie as far as bulking that character up.

I dealt with a smaller Wolverine simply because the guy playing him actually does a decent job…but I still cringe every time this guy does a pose that is supposed to make him look like a bad ass yet it only shows how small he really is even if he is in shape and lean.

Conan is nothing but muscle and a sword. I am not sure how the hell they feel alright with making him an Abercrombie model.

I will be greatly shocked if they actually bulk that actor up enough to make him look like he should be taking heads off of armies.[/quote]

I agree with you but c’mon its not going to happen. With all mainstream media’s attention on steroids and their “harmfulness” and illegality producers in Hollywood I’d imagine are probably very reluctant to even consider someone with REAL big muscle. Imagine if they actually cast someone large, you’re going to have people undoubtedly shout “steroids!” in the movie theater when that muscular physique is first exposed.


On another note, X I’d slightly appreciate it if you’d refer to “the guy” that plays Wolverine as Hugh Jackman. I mean I know hes Aussie which makes it weirder that I’m asking you that but he deserves respect for crying out loud! Are we so dull that we are blindly breaking down the fabric of modern society? Hes a big actor X, any movie buff will tell you that…

I need to see a link or something b4 I beleave this. I had heard that they want Fox as Red Sonja but I havent seen anything on a new Conan.


Edit: Fuck my Life!! He had best strat drinking milk and doing squats for fuck sake.


Here’s another funny Conan pic I found that turns Frank Frazetta’s iconic pic on its head

Metrosexuals pay heed…

http://l.yimg.com/l/tv/us/img/site/91/30/0000039130_20070413145208.jpg

Here is a real image of him without the airbrushing. As an actor, he can probably play the character of Conan, but without the size, it will not be good. He could have the potential to put on some size, but, as has been said, I’m sure they will not want him to do it. They’ll probably get him to be more cut, but that’s about it. These days, that’s what people consider huge. Since most of the guys that are considered as being in good shape are thinner than their female costars, then if he gets a little more cut, he will be huge by comparison.

EDIT: Sorry, screwed up. First time I ever tried to post a picture. But the link works.

I thought Conan was “Cimmerian”, which is supposed to be a mix of Teutonic/Celtic-ish. When did Conan get dreads and go Caribbean/Mediterranean?

[quote]Nards wrote:
Here’s another funny Conan pic I found that turns Frank Frazetta’s iconic pic on its head[/quote]

Feminist’s dream…but ONLY a dream.

[quote]Spartiates wrote:
I thought Conan was “Cimmerian”, which is supposed to be a mix of Teutonic/Celtic-ish. When did Conan get dreads and go Caribbean/Mediterranean?[/quote]

Exactly! This man knows his stuff.

Depends on which era they are portraying him? Younger he as more svelt and in his 40s more muscular… form a wiki post and I remeber this from the books.

"Physical appearanceConan is darkly tanned, has “sullen” or “smoldering” blue eyes, a “mane” of long black hair, and is scarred - Howard mentions most often the scarring on his face. Contrary to many modern illustrations, Conan is hirsute:

So formidable was his appearance, naked but for short leather breeks and sleeveless shirt, open to reveal his great, hairy chest, with his huge limbs and his blue eyes blazing under his tangled black mane, … [The Hour of the Dragon, Chapter 3]
He is exceptionally tall and strong. Howard is never explicit in his stories, but in a letter to P. Schuyler Miller he wrote:

At Vanarium he was already a formidable antagonist, though only fifteen. He stood six feet [1.83 m] and weighed 180 pounds [82 kg], though he lacked much of having his full growth.
Conan’s height and weight as an adult are subject to speculation - some estimates make him 6’ 6" (2 m) and up to 250 lb (113 kg) - but extrapolating the growth of the 15-year-old Conan based on modern data would make him at least 6’ 2" (1.88 m) and 216 lbs (98 kg) at 18. This talies with a comment Howard wrote in another letter that his crusader character Cormac Fitzgeoffrey is a double of Conan and that Cormac is 6’ 2" and 215 pounds.

In Howard’s tales no human is ever described as stronger than Conan, although several are mentioned as taller (such as the strangler Baal-Pteor) or of larger bulk.

Although Conan is muscular, Howard frequently compares his silence, suppleness, agility, way of moving to that of a panther - see, for instance, “The Servants of Bit-Yakin” (“Jewels of Gwahlur”), Beyond the Black River or “Rogues in the House” - or another feline:

He moved with the supple ease of a great tiger, his steely muscles rippling under his brown skin. [“The Tower of the Elephant”]
His garb is very often a loincloth or breeches and sandals, and his weapon a sword of some description, depending on his fortunes and location.

He had discarded his torn tunic, and walked through the night naked except for a loin-cloth and his high-strapped sandals. [“The Tower of the Elephant”]
His only garment was a pair of short red silk breeks, and his sandals were slung to his back, out of his way, as were his sword and dagger. [“The Servants of Bit-Yakin”]
Sometimes he wears more:

The man in the boat was a picturesque figure. A crimson scarf was knotted about his head; his wide silk breeches, of flaming hue, were upheld by a broad sash, which likewise supported a scimitar in a shagreen scabbard. His gilt-worked leather boots suggested the horseman rather than the seaman, but he handled his boat with skill. Through his widely open white silk shirt showed his broad, muscular breast, burned brown by the sun. [“The Devil in Iron”]
The stranger was clad like himself in regard to boots and breeks, though the latter were of silk instead of leather. But he wore a sleeveless hauberk of dark mesh-mail in place of a tunic, and a helmet perched on his black mane. That helmet held the other’s gaze; it was without a crest, but adorned by short bull’s horns. [Beyond the Black River]
During his reign as King of Aquilonia, Conan was:

â?¦ a tall man, mightily shouldered and deep of chest, with a massive corded neck and heavily muscled limbs. He was clad in silk and velvet, with the royal lions of Aquilonia worked in gold upon his rich jupon, and the crown of Aquilonia shone on his square-cut black mane; but the great sword at his side seemed more natural to him than the regal accouterments. His brow was low and broad, his eyes a volcanic blue that smoldered as if with some inner fire. His dark, scarred, almost sinister face was that of a fighting-man, and his velvet garments could not conceal the hard, dangerous lines of his limbs." [The Hour of the Dragon, pp. 89-90)]
He loses none of his vigour with age with the above description coming when he is in his mid 40’s.

Though several later authors have referred to Conan as “Germanic-looking,” Howard imagined the Cimmerians as a proto-Celtic people with mostly dark hair and blue or grey eyes. Racially the Cimmerians to which Conan belongs are descendants of the Atlanteans, though they do not remember their ancestry. In his pseudo-historical essay “The Hyborian Age”, Howard describes how the people of Atlantis (the land where his character Kull originated) had to move east after a great cataclysm changed the face of the world and sank their island, settling where northern Scotland and Norway would eventually be located. In the same work, Howard also described how the Cimmerians eventually moved south and east after the age of Conan. "

Re-Damn-diculous. Conan is huge. End of discussion. This is just as bad as making Spiderman an emo douche bag when he merged with the venom symbiote. This is Conan we are talking about. I dont want an actor, he could grunt for all i care. Hell, in the first one, Arnold say a grand total of maybe 20 words throughout the entire movie, half of which were simply “Crom!” That little queermo isnt airbrushed, he’s fucking airbroomed.

[quote]Akuma01 wrote:
Re-Damn-diculous. Conan is huge. End of discussion. This is just as bad as making Spiderman an emo douche bag when he merged with the venom symbiote. This is Conan we are talking about. I dont want an actor, he could grunt for all i care. Hell, in the first one, Arnold say a grand total of maybe 20 words throughout the entire movie, half of which were simply “Crom!” That little queermo isnt airbrushed, he’s fucking airbroomed. [/quote] Exactly.

While im a huge fan of the original Conans what are the chances of someone actually getting all jacked up in that type of enviroment and circumstance.The chances are slim, in reality the real life conan would be a lightly muscled very toned Christian Bale sized person.

I think The Rock should get all jacked back up and be the new Conan but its not gonna happen.

that’s why it’s Fiction, and not an autobiography. What are the chances an interstellar galactic group of beings come down and give one of us a ring, or that one among us has the ability to control the flow of Chi, or blah blah. Lol Cmon man, In reality? The Rock COULDVE played a Conan. MANY people could’ve played a Conan, or atleast a better Conan than this guy would play.

And like i said, its not about his acting. You could get James earl Jones to play Conan, and it just wouldnt fit the bill. Why? Cuz Conan isnt an educated, poetic, talking, requiring talent sort of persona. He needs THICK arms. Why? Cuz youre a fucking barbarian, if you cant swing a damn tree trunk, youd get laughed out of BU (barbarian University). You need a THICK chest.

Why? What dominant force doesnt have tits? And you need a WIDE back. Why? Cuz your a barbarian. You climb shit, you knock it over. Boulder in the way? break it. Eat it. Shit brick houses. THATS a barbarian. Barbarians dont do Aerobics. The closest thing this guy and Conan have together is their Toenail color. He paints his toenails red, and Conan stomps a bloody mud hole in your ass.

[edit] I mean hell, They got Vinnie jones to play Juggernaut (awful movie btw), but atleast they put him in a muscle suit! Vinnie jones is to Juggernaut what that kid is to Conan. unless they plan on suiting him up, lol its a no go.

I will not be seeing this new version of Conan and fuck all the women and children and men who think badass hardass he men shouldn’t be muscled up manly men. They have to keep checking their pants to see if they got a dick, Conan had one.

New Conan?!

[quote]horsepuss wrote:
While im a huge fan of the original Conans what are the chances of someone actually getting all jacked up in that type of enviroment and circumstance.The chances are slim, in reality the real life conan would be a lightly muscled very toned Christian Bale sized person.

I think The Rock should get all jacked back up and be the new Conan but its not gonna happen.[/quote]
That’s the best thing about “The Scorpion King” is that you kind of get a Rock as Conan movie.

[quote]horsepuss wrote:
While im a huge fan of the original Conans what are the chances of someone actually getting all jacked up in that type of enviroment and circumstance.The chances are slim, in reality the real life conan would be a lightly muscled very toned Christian Bale sized person.

I think The Rock should get all jacked back up and be the new Conan but its not gonna happen.[/quote]

Dude, its fiction. he weighed bout 250lbs, 2m tall, but with the grace and stealth of a ninja and the ferocity of a berserker. he was a freak of nature, not a normal guy.

[quote]Akuma01 wrote:
He needs THICK arms. Why? Cuz youre a fucking barbian, if you cant swing a damn tree trunk, youd get laughed out of BU (barbarian University). You need a THICK chest. Why? What dominant force doesnt have tits? And you need a WIDE back. Why? Cuz your a barbarian. You climb shit, you knock it over. Boulder in the way? break it. Eat it. Eat brick houses. THATS a barbarian. Barbarians dont do Aerobics. The closest thing this guy and Conan have together is their Toenail color. He paints his toenails red, and Conan stomps a bloody mud hole in your ass.
[/quote]

LOL!

They should’ve put you on the casting panel and this is EXACTLY what you should have said to any emo fairy princess that auditioned for the part.

Just for fun you could have ended with something like this…

If you can wear these horse hair underpants and hairy ugg boots and ‘still’ look like you deserve my respect then you got the part

Thought so…