T Nation

Never get close to a stripper

I don’t know how it happened. About a year ago I ran into this girl, and we sparked. We spent the next months very close to one another and then she told me that she does private dancing. At first I thought I could handle it, I know she is faithfull but I just don’t like the idea
of my girlfriend dancing naked and that anyone can see her. So I decided to break things off. I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing? Anyone else been in this situation?

I don’t know a girl who does that, but I know of one. She’s in business at my school, so she’s obviously just doing it as a summer job & has plans for something else when she grads. I was surprised when I saw her come out on stage, but that’s all. I wouldn’t think it’s a good idea & I wouldn’t go see her at work, but I woulddn’t make her stop if she wasn’t planning to make a career out of it.

I don’t think its cool that she waited so long to tell you. Never been in this situation. Your call.

Actually I used to date strippers intentionally. Pretty fun girls. But then I always knew what they did before hand. I don’t think many of them take relationships too seriously so you shouldn’t either.

Eh, don’t date her, just fuck her.

Your girlfriend is a stripper? Ah yes, I couldn’t wait to tell my grandmother that. This is a no brainer, don’t get serious with a girl who rubs her hoo-haw all over several horny men every night to earn a honest (well kinda) dollar. There are plenty of other fish in the sea out there for ya buddy. And they won’t be rubbing their fins all over some whales wanker for a living.

“She does private dancing”? Meaning - sucks dicks for money? :wink:

But, what about LOVE, people? If a man and a woman, or a man and a man, or a woman and a 13 inch dildo, love each other, let not their wicked occupations stand in the way of true happiness! Let them roam free, side by side, embracing the wild card life had dealt them! Love makes the world go around!

Nah. Dumpity-dump-dump.

Well, obviously if it bothers YOU (and it seems it does), then you won’t be able to pursue a real relationship with her unless she stops earning a living that way. You have done the right thing in this case because you are not comfortable with her occupation. If you still remained in this relationship, with nothing changing in it, there would be a large rift there, that eventually would become bigger. The only way things can work is if you HONESTLY change the way you feel about her job, or she changes jobs (willingly, that is, and not just because you want her to).

Offer to support her financially (maybe even marry her) so she doesn’t HAVE to do the job, and see what choice she makes. If she chooses to continue, then you can walk away – she enjoys it and would resent you taking her away from it if you forced her.

The fact she does “private dancing” indicates there is a 90% chance she is doing more than dancing. If she worked in a reputable club then I would say that number would be more like 25%-50% chance she does more than dance for her customers. Personally, I would never get involved in a relationship with a stripper.

GM has it, right on the money. If you’re interested in a long term relationship with this girl and her dancing bothers you that much (which is completely understandable), you should tell her. If she doesn’t instantly do an about-face and quit, then you guys are headed for serious troubles down the road. Break it off and find a girl that you’re more compatible with. As a side note, I’ve seen strippers string guys along for months and bleed them dry, leaving them heartbroken. Their trade demands that they become masters at manipulating men (who primarily think with the wrong head). That power is very tempting to abuse.

you got out at the right time man, ya have sex with a stripper but don’t ever get attached to one, if you give a stripper you’re heart she’ll stomp on it…i hear that tired arguement about how some women, need to strip to support their child or put themself through college, which is fine, but these women have a lot of baggage

I used to live next door to a stripper. I always thought it would be neighborly of her to come over and strip for me, but she never did.

Good job nailing that stripper,boy!

I have to admit I have a soft spot in my heart for strippers. I have dated a small handful over the last 10 years and in my experience most of them were good hearted girls but were lost souls. Many of them have come from abusive childhood situations and lacked the self esteem and/or support to get a better education or skill training. It’s pretty tough to beat the kind of cash many of these girls can make In a weird way I think many of them get a sense of power and maybe some self worth from being able to get money from men for dances. I know it’s all quite disfunctional, but a girls got to make a living and it’s tough to blame them when big time quick cash is there for the taking. Having said all this, you gotta enter into a relationship with a stripper with an open mind. You must be secure enough in yourself to not be jealous and avoid going to her place of work. Many strippers are manipulative and often less than up front about the truth, so don’t get too deep into this relationship. Have fun, don’t take things seriously and enjoy the fact that your hangin with a stripper. If you do decide to stay with her accept her profession and learn to deal with it. Don’t throw it in her face all the time. If this is not possible than forget her. Good luck

Yea, you did the right thing. keep your distance…it’s a fool proof plan.

Guys, where are your manners? They are not strippers, they are entertainers. Gee whiz.

:::: Moulin Rouge :::: Dun, dun, dun! Ever seen it buddy? If not, maybe you should.

From one former stripper dater, to another… bail before, or if you think you’re going to become emotionally involved with her, which it seems like you already are. Like others have said, some are manipulative, others are hooked to the money they make, and generally their morals and loyalty are far less then what girlfriend material would be.

Well I got addicted to the rush of having all of these women talk to me at Stars. But after blowing over 1000 dollars, I realized they onlt liked my money. Made me move from Oregon back home Hawaii, so could save some money. Stay away or else risk psychotherapy.