Never Drinking Again. Ever.

OH man…It’s Halloween and I’m a vampire. I put on my fangs, eye black, fake blood, vampire medallion and cape. I drink a few gin & tonics at my house. I’m lookin pretty vampy. I figure I’m FINALLY going to get to hook up with the cute redhead that lives on the 2nd floor. They’re having a houseparty and I’m going to go to it later.

I head to a bar first and apparently get a couple rum & cokes. I head back to my apartment and head to the 2nd floor. They’re having a 40 oz.er halloween party. Perfect. I love 40s. I drink one. I see the girl, she looks fucking adorable. I realize that I’m pretty drunk. I do a quick calculation and realize I’ve probably had about 10 shots of hard liquor and a 40 in under 75 minutes.

I figure, whatever, I can handle it. I figure I’ll go talk to her after I finish my next 40. I go into the bathroom because I have to pee. That’s the last thing I remember.

I wake up this morning face down in my bed, with my costume and boots still on, an mp3 playing on my computer that’s stuck repeating a 1 second loop from the middle of the song for some reason, a half empty 40 by my bed, and my cape drawn up over my head. I get up and light shines in my face and I actually hiss and draw the cape up over my face. It would’ve been funny if anyone else was there to see it. I vaguely remember throwing up in my bathroom at some point in the night.

I see one of my room mates, he headed up there long after I had left. He actually talked to the girl and she said that I told her I threw up 14 times. The girl I want to hook up with. I walked up to her and told her I threw up 14 times.

Who the FUCK does that?? Who says “Hey there’s that pretty girl I like. I’ll go impress her by telling her that I just ejaculated my stomach contents over a dozen times.” I mean I didn’t even throw up when I was in their apartment. I didn’t throw up until later. I was lying to this girl and simultaneously killing any chance I ever have of hooking up with her.

I am never. drinking. again. after this weekend.

Atleast you didn’t show her the puke. That would’ve been awkward.

Edit: Oh hahahaha, a readhead man, you screwed up. Hehehe. Poor guy. heh

[quote]AccipiterQ wrote:
OH man…It’s Halloween and I’m a vampire. I put on my fangs, eye black, fake blood, vampire medallion and cape. I drink a few gin & tonics at my house. I’m lookin pretty vampy. I figure I’m FINALLY going to get to hook up with the cute redhead that lives on the 2nd floor. They’re having a houseparty and I’m going to go to it later.

I head to a bar first and apparently get a couple rum & cokes. I head back to my apartment and head to the 2nd floor. They’re having a 40 oz.er halloween party. Perfect. I love 40s. I drink one. I see the girl, she looks fucking adorable. I realize that I’m pretty drunk. I do a quick calculation and realize I’ve probably had about 10 shots of hard liquor and a 40 in under 75 minutes.

I figure, whatever, I can handle it. I figure I’ll go talk to her after I finish my next 40. I go into the bathroom because I have to pee. That’s the last thing I remember.

I wake up this morning face down in my bed, with my costume and boots still on, an mp3 playing on my computer that’s stuck repeating a 1 second loop from the middle of the song for some reason, a half empty 40 by my bed, and my cape drawn up over my head. I get up and light shines in my face and I actually hiss and draw the cape up over my face. It would’ve been funny if anyone else was there to see it. I vaguely remember throwing up in my bathroom at some point in the night.

I see one of my room mates, he headed up there long after I had left. He actually talked to the girl and she said that I told her I threw up 14 times. The girl I want to hook up with. I walked up to her and told her I threw up 14 times. Who the FUCK does that?? Who says “Hey there’s that pretty girl I like. I’ll go impress her by telling her that I just ejaculated my stomach contents over a dozen times.” I mean I didn’t even throw up when I was in their apartment. I didn’t throw up until later. I was lying to this girl and simultaneously killing any chance I ever have of hooking up with her.

I am never. drinking. again. after this weekend.
[/quote]

Who does that? You. Why? Because you’ve let yourself become a stupid, self-pitying drunk.

OP. Crack open a beer or two this morning and rock the hair of the dog. You’ll feel better.

I apparently drunk dialed my mom and wished her a happy halloween. She just called me and said that I sounded like I was half in the bag. I told her it was the vampire fangs making my words come out funny…

dude, your in college, who gives a shit? that’s what college is for, to screw up stuff so in a decade you have something to laugh about.

[quote]matsm21 wrote:
dude, your in college, who gives a shit? that’s what college is for, to screw up stuff so in a decade you have something to laugh about.[/quote]

Does grad school count? I’m also 27…

[quote]AccipiterQ wrote:
matsm21 wrote:
dude, your in college, who gives a shit? that’s what college is for, to screw up stuff so in a decade you have something to laugh about.

Does grad school count? I’m also 27…[/quote]

you suck…

[quote]That One Guy wrote:
AccipiterQ wrote:
matsm21 wrote:
dude, your in college, who gives a shit? that’s what college is for, to screw up stuff so in a decade you have something to laugh about.

Does grad school count? I’m also 27…

you suck…[/quote]

What year is grad school?

Welcome to Halloween
I threw up last night and plan on a repeat performance. OU woo

just laugh it off and next time you see her make a joke about it. that’s what i gotta do tonight because last night i embarrased myself a little bit with a red head, beat up indian jones and sent him to the hospital and then yaked hard! Irish whisky… who knew!
now i’m off to the beer store!

[quote]RebornTN wrote:

What year is grad school?[/quote]

A year too many for this guy.

I thought AQ dropped out of graduate school?

[quote]AccipiterQ wrote:
matsm21 wrote:
dude, your in college, who gives a shit? that’s what college is for, to screw up stuff so in a decade you have something to laugh about.

Does grad school count? I’m also 27…[/quote]

I would count it. I’m in grad school. But I’m only 22.

Drinking a “pumpkin ale” right now.

AQ, you’ll drink again. Don’t worry.

lol

[quote]VON_Ballack wrote:
just laugh it off and next time you see her make a joke about it. that’s what i gotta do tonight because last night i embarrased myself a little bit with a red head, beat up indian jones and sent him to the hospital and then yaked hard! Irish whisky… who knew!
now i’m off to the beer store![/quote]

Oh I definitely plan on doing that. (not raping indiana jones, actually talking to the girl again). I figure if I brush it off it’ll make me look somewhat better.

dont even mention it, she might have been drunk and not remember.

[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
You again? Shouldn’t you be on an AA website instead of T-Nation?

BBB[/quote]

L0L

The Chronicles of the Village Idiot continue…