T Nation

Need Some High-School Dating Tips


“Avoid eye contact”


This is much different than dating advice imo since you haven’t even established a connection with her or really know if she knows you exist in real life. Best plan is to just go talk to her. You sound like you don’t even know her actual interests yet so that would be a good place to start.

I’m like a lot of the other guys here in the sense that dating in high school is much different now than then. My wife and I used to chat over MySpace and I used to frequent Xanga, LimeWire and NewGrounds so I have no clue about joining someone’s insta live. I didn’t even know normal people did those tbh.

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Well, the way to make a move is to make a move. And own it.

Figure out a time to approach her, alone, and in person. Like show up at lunch sometime early.

Go up to her and say “I’ve seen you around a lot and you seem pretty cool and I wanted to see if we had anything in common. Would you like it if I asked you to go have a cup of coffee some time?”

She’ll either say “yes” or “no”.

If the response is “no” – smile and say “damn it, all the cool girls are always taken. I should have known” and move on and don’t give it another thought.

If “yes” go have coffee.

Screw all the electronic stalking bullshit. Be a man. Women like men.

Odds are, it’s a “no” by the way. Because cool girls are always taken. You just need to practice the shaking off the rejection bit until your faking it becomes reality.

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I’ll have to catch her when she’s leaving lunch that’s the perfect time. Tomorrow is when we both have lunch. (It’s gonna come down to talking first but i’ll eventually ask for her number).


That’s the friendzone move. Just go ask her. She be impressed with the directness.

Mind you, she’ll probably still say “no.” But she’ll say no after talking with her for weeks, too. Women decide if you are datable in the first 30 seconds. Your approach just wastes your time.


Then this kid belongs in the beta orbiter thread

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Direct approach sounds like a great idea.
I don’t want to waste my time.


Do you know for sure that she’s single?

In my experience, and this doesn’t happen to everybody, I was decent friends with the girl’s friends, and was able to be included in group outings (with guys and girls, not being a beta orbiter) which made it easier to get to know her. Eventually started texting and that led to hanging out, and eventually dating.

If I was single right now, I’d just sit by her or something and ask her to hang out (as long as she knew I existed). How old are you/her? Flap said a coffee date is too old, but I’m technically the age of a college freshman (though not in school) and all the high school seniors and college freshman girls I know would be down to grab coffee if they liked the dude…if we move more 1-2 years away from my age I’m not sure.

Make sure you can smile, make eye contact, come up with conversation material…etc. I hear all the time about guys turning girls off by only talking about themselves on a date and I have no clue how that happens. If I took a new girl out all I’d really want to do is learn about how - that’s why I asked her out (theoretically).

Take care of yourself too. Dress well - and this doesn’t need to mean expensive clothing, with a new outfit daily, but keep your clothes clean and well fitting. Bathe often, and take care of your hair. Keep on lifting - I’ve seen your username around the forums but don’t remember what your programming/goals are. Stick with stuff long term and in a year or two you’ll be bigger than the guys who bounce around. Stand out from the crowd with big legs and a big back, but remember that girls do love those abzzz at our age so keep your diet in check and do some conditioning. Basically get big and strong without becoming fat.

And don’t get hung up on the girl. A couple times I’d develop a crush in high school and be devastated when the girl didn’t reciprocate or started liking someone else. Felt like it was the end of my world and now looking back (I’m 19) I don’t even remember why I liked them. If this doesn’t work out you’ll definitely get over it.

Best of luck dude.


Thank you for your kind words.

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Number is secured men.


Well done, young sir. Seems like acquiring the number is more symbolic than anything given you two already interact on IG and Snap.


Anyone got tips for texting?


Dick pic


ask about something mutual and neutral, like classes. If you two have some classes in common, pretend (or not) to have a question about an assignment or something and strike up a conversation


Sorry anna … your answer is bullshit.

@strongmangoals is correct.

(OP ftr listen to anna. do not listen to me or @strongmangoals - we’re morons)


Everyone has different texting tendencies and behaviors. I think there’s no shame in simply sending her a random “Good morning! I hope you have a great day :)” text on a weekend morning and try go from there. It’s a safe approach that can allow you to more easily gauge her interest since she won’t be occupied with school and allows for you two to actually have a conversation, if she’s interested and big on texting.


Hey! I resemble that remark!


If you’re shy, getting her to send one (wait, that doesn’t sound right) first will help.

Really though, a class/homework question or just a “How’s it going” seems to do the trick.


I’m confused


You shouldn’t be