T Nation

Need help fast!

Ok let me start by saying I’m a dumb fuck. I’ve recently met a girl and we’ve have a great connection. Every time we are together we have a wonderful time and I’m starting to care about her a lot. She feels the same way however I think her feelings are even stronger as I tend to take things cautiously when starting a relationship. Well last night we spent the night together for the first time. She had to leave around 3:00 a.m. to get ready for work and as I was letting her out we said our goodbyes and I being stupid said I love you. There was a brief pause as she pondered this and then replied in kind. Now here is the problem, I don’t love her. I care about her a lot but no way do I know her well enough to say something like this. In fact I usually get in trouble by most girlfriends for not saying it enough. I honestly don’t know why I said it. It was late and I was tired, it just kind of came out without me thinking about it. Well I’ll be seeing her later tonight and I don’t have any idea of what to do. Do I act like it never happened? Or do I explain to her that I care a lot about her but have no idea why I said that. I don’t want to hurt this girl, I genuinely care about her feelings and now feel like I just fucked and awesome freindship and the start of a great relationship. T-maggers please help me out here, I don’t know what to do.

You did it now. I guess you’re going to have to marry her, have 2.4 kids, buy a mini van and a house in the suburbs. OK, maybe not. It is a tough deal though. Those are some pretty heavily emotionally charged words. I guess you just figured out that they need to be treated like a loaded gun in the future. You can’t just go waving them around in a crowd. The best thing, and the hardest thing is to do, is talk to her and explain that it was a slip. With luck she’ll be relieved. I get the feelig she might be from the pregnant pause prior to her response.

Don’t backpedal man! Just pretend it didn’t happen, and go on with the relaitonship. And DON’T SAY IT AGAIN before you really mean it.

Just roll with it. This is the perfect opportunity to take advantage of her. Nail her then tell her to get out and never speak to her again. She’ll figure out you weren’t serious when you said you loved her.

I agree with S. Eyes. I did the same exact thing when I was about 22 yrs. old. Same type of situation, same type of slip. The next time I saw her I told her that it was a slip and that I didn’t know her well enough to say that to her and I didn’t want to lead her on. She totally understood, told me she knew it was too soon to feel that way and appreciated me being homest enough to come clean. Herc