There may be a possibility of grandchildren. We kind of don’t want any kids. That can always change down the road though. But we will see.
I’ve never had the opportunity to ask this from anyone and I’m curious, if you don’t want to answer it’s fine
We just don’t want to subject our kids to today’s fuckery. i know, I know, kids choose their own path, and you can only do your best, but still. A mother is more than just her ability to reproduce or it being a feminine word. She and the father have so much to live up to in terms of being a parent. The saying goes, “A mother is like God in the eyes of a child”, and by dammit the gravity of that statement just makes me anxious. So much stuff, so much planning, so much problem solving. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. I don’t want my parenting to be an experimentation of what to do and what not to do. I know all of what I’ve said sounds contradictory probably, but it’s just how I feel. Even now, when I see children or they’re around me I’m just completely silent. I don’t even touch them, or anything because I view them as such delicate little things. Very innocent and full of happy stuff. I know what I said could also sound cowardly and just not being brave, but I’d rather think in depth like this, than do what I see a majority of young girls my age are doing now. So many of them shouldn’t even be having kids. They themselves are practically still kids. What I believe in, and what I stand for…it just makes me think critically like that. And in return I just get rather anxious and I’d rather wait. Even if I end up waiting too long, it’s another possible life that won’t be subjected to all the worldly crap there is. But once again, this is just what I believe.
One thing I really admire about you is your ability to explain why you think in a certain way
A lot of people would’ve just said “eh, I don’t feel like having kids”
It’s like if I was reading a novel
But yes, I do get your point.
My old biology teacher once told us: “Don’t think about when you’re ready to have kids, you’ll never be ready. Just have them when you feel like it and be happy.”
I kind of like his statement, but it’s coming from a guy who routinely rows his boat to the edge of the world with Santa Claus
Actually that makes me like it even more
He was a great guy
That’s very true
Personally I want to have kids at some point, but not before I’m working full time, just to ensure that they can have a great childhood.
I don’t want wreck my own plans by having kids which is exactly what happens to people who have kids when they are 16. They drop out of school and end up doing some dead-end, low paying job they hate. I don’t want that.
And I respect that, as should anyone who isn’t a complete jerk.
Yesterday’s training session was a big win for me for a multitude of reasons
First off, the session was rather good even though I had just marched 22 kilometers with a fast pace while carrying a landmine and being under the effect of pepper spray (I was lucky enough to be pepper sprayed on Thursday and some of the capsaicin remained on my face and it begun to affect me again during Friday’s March)
Needless to say, I was pretty tired afterwards (I only slept three hours the night before the march)
Second, I was able to completely trash my upper body with a really simple session. All I did was this:
-One set of 15 (6 plates)
drop a plate
-One set of 30
Drop a plate
-One set of 30
-2 rest-pause sets for both
3 Rear delt pulls
-2 rest-pause sets
This took about 25-30 minutes to accomplish
(Yes, I’m a lot weaker than I used to be)
But still, I’m sore as hell now.
Third, I was able to do dips with no pain. That means I’ll have a way to do heavy chest pressing during the army and I have a new upper body push movement to experiment with.
AND I found organic while milk that was 30% off! (Not during the session of course)
I love whole milk.
Yesterday was a good day.
Thank you. One of the few reasons I’ve found my calling in the psychology/psychiatry professions. I find it a bit of an art, to have a way around words. They’re what pictures are, if pictures could utter noises. Big fan of poetry too. Have a closet full of them lol.
Ha. He sounds like a cool guy. And as I mentioned before, I too, do not think I’ll ever be ready. I wasn’t “ready” to get married, but here I am. Walking around with a piece of metal on one of my fingers, that makes me all happy and giddy when I catch the light bounce off of it.
And with that being so, I welcome change. With open arms.
My mother had my oldest brother at 17. Gave him the world and and everything else she could, along with my dad. Spoiled him, educated him, let him grow in his own unique way, and yet at the age of 34, my brother all my brother knows now is drugs, violence, anger, and prison. But he chose that, and my mom is still a good mother. Nothing changes that.
On the other end is me. My mom was a lot more careful and didn’t have me until she was around 35-37. I was also a very peculiar child. Wasn’t very social, left handed, always touching and tinkering with stuff, talking to myself, etc. I was disciplined rather normally. Spankings when I needed them. However my mom and dad didn’t really discipline me by means of a belt or the hand that often, they disciplined me by making me think. Allowing me to understand how A leads to Z. And they were very open to their past lives, mistakes they made. I remember one time right before I was admitted into inpatient care my told me to never view her as someone who couldn’t mess up. And even to this day I still remember that. I think a lot of parents mess up with that. Never letting their kids see how human they are.
And that’s one of many things I respect and admire about my parents, mostly my mother. And I’m glad I have a mom such as her.
So I know I’ll probably never be ready. Like ever. But in my mind, I always look for reoccurring instances, ones that yield accurate outcomes usually every time. Good ones of course. Sort of like a trial and error, minus the trial part. Weeding stuff out I guess you could say, but by observation. And most likely I’ll be like that if I have kids, which can be good, but also bad in that as a parent, my ability to adapt when faced with change is very important.
Even if I were to never make that much money, you’d be surprised what a well brought up and intelligent child can grow up to be. And that’s what I want to give them. The gift to be intelligent, unwavering, kindhearted, resourceful, having great candor, etc. Of course I’d still like to spoil them and buy them things, and provide for them as well.
16 is very young. Espeacially on your own. I know of only one younger girl I sometimes say hi to online, her mom let her stay with her, because she realized her daughter is still a kid. Trying to raise a kid, and I congratulate her mom for having such a degree of understanding and caring to that extent.
I’ve trained myself on learning to except even when don’t, but taking a lot of joy in those that do. So thank you
just glimpsed through the log. interesting read. thought i should say hi.
Hello and welcome aboard!
If you have any questions feel free to ask, I love having a good conversation
In my opinion your ability to express yourself in depth by writing speaks volumes about your intelligence and depth of character - the way you write also mirrors your personality in a sense. Someone who only uses short and plain sentences is usually more of a straight-to-the-point person, and someone who never uses emojis may be more serious than someone who uses them a lot.
Of course a smart person changes his/hers writing style according to the situation.
That’s sad, hopefully he realizes that you can enjoy life without destroying yourself.
That’s a great way to discipline a child, I’ve actually never heard of anyone using that.
I agree with that, all the way.
We’ve done our best as a family to help him, and at the moment he just seems to not really care anymore. But that’s one thing I’d be extremely worried about as a mom. Not just my kids but other kids as well.
I’ve heard/seen it work on kids who are a bit more analytical and smarter. Not saying any other kid is downright stupid, of course not, but for those who require teachings in a non physical type of way. As I got older my mom would just talk to me in such a way that was like, “I don’t take you as an idiot, but explain to me the things you will reap by doing this?” And she’d ask me to think about better alternatives. Stuff of that nature.
thats not toddler stuff. my 2 year old looked at me with an empty glare and then she pulled off her diapers and threw them through the living room as she yelled “just pee”.
I wasn’t implying she did that when I was a toddler. When I was that age she let me be a toddler. Like most parents. She started doing that when I hit puberty, and when I started holding conversations with more meaning.
i sorta figured. just couldnt resist the opportunity to tell about my toddler’s latest feat.
General life update
I’m home for the weekend, man was I excited to go and train hard for a couple of days
But now I’ve got fever. I don’t know where it came from, but I got it. I was feeling a bit sick yesterday, but it didn’t really bother me (I didn’t train yesterday though, thank god) but today is a whole different story.
My body temperature is around 39℃ at the moment so it’s pretty darn high for me. (Usually I’m in the 34.5-35℃ range) so yeah, no training this weekend. One thing I’m glad about is that I’m at home, so I don’t need to do anything strenuous. (Of course I could just go to the doc if I was on duty at the moment, but man I’m stubborn about that. When I rolled my ankle I didn’t report it before I was forced to. Yeah, I’m stupid sometimes)
I guess what I’m trying to say is if you are sick, don’t force yourself into the gym. Even if you need to take a week off it’s still better that way than it would be if you trained and it got even worse. Of course if it’s just a slight sickness, go ahead and train - just adjust your intensity according to your condition.
So what do I plan on doing?
Well, I’ll down a lot of food and water. I’ll try to get down, say three pounds of vegetables per day during the weekend - I’d eat more bit I’ve also got a sore throat. In addition to that, at least a bulb of garlic per day.
If you are sick there is absolutely no reason to avoid eating. You won’t turn into a pile of fat just because you can’t train for a while. By not eating you’ll only delay your recovery and you’ll lose muscle mass and strength that way.
One more tip: if you are sick, have an alarm clock or something to tell you when to eat, just to avoid “forgetting” meals. If you start to feel sleepy during the day, turn the alarm off so you don’t wake yourself up, sleep is still the best medicine.
Genral life update
The fever has settled, but since yesterday evening I’ve been coughing up blood and having terrible headaches and joint pain
Yeah, I’m not feeling too well. Swallowing anything hurts and I feel weaker than ever. Yeah, I’m not going to die here bit it sure feels like I will.
Hopefully I recover soon, next week’s schedule makes it so that going to the doc would be a really bad idea.
idk how that works, but i know ive heard different opinions on that. hope u will recover asap.
I go by “if you aren’t going to throw up right away, eat” it has worked pretty well for me
You’ve been to a doctor, right? Coughing up blood fits into the oh fuck I need medical attention section.
I haven’t, I couldn’t get a time for the weekend
During this week I most likely can’t get to the doc either - I cannot tell why but that’s just so
Of course if it gets really bad I’ll go, no matter the circumstances - I don’t want to die because of this
I’m just wondering what it could be - pneumonia fits the picture, and it has been going around here, but I hope that’s not it.
Thanks for caring