T Nation

My Horrible 18th Birthday...

today sucked (actually yesterday)!

i went to my first strip club and since it was my birthday, i had to go up on center stage, with this other guy who was a bachelor btw, and had about ten lap dances with tits in my face. aww man it was great.

heres the bad part that turned it all around. i was wearing basketball shorts underneath my jeans so i practically didn’t feel anything and honestly, i never got one boner when up there. oh ya, and i had to get on all fours with my pants off and they all slapped my ass with a leather whip. it hurt like a mother fucking bitch

but still, i liked the fact that i saw my first live pussy

That was your first real live pussy? Umm…were you home-schooled and locked in your yard by any chance?

[quote]Creidem wrote:
That was your first real live pussy? Umm…were you home-schooled and locked in your yard by any chance?

[/quote]

no i just never really had the chance to hook up with any girls/ fuck them

[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
Creidem wrote:
That was your first real live pussy? Umm…were you home-schooled and locked in your yard by any chance?

no i just never really had the chance to hook up with any girls/ fuck them[/quote]

Then you should

[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
today sucked (actually yesterday)!

i went to my first strip club and since it was my birthday, i had to go up on center stage, with this other guy who was a bachelor btw, and had about ten lap dances with tits in my face. aww man it was great.

heres the bad part that turned it all around. i was wearing basketball shorts underneath my jeans so i practically didn’t feel anything and honestly, i never got one boner when up there. oh ya, and i had to get on all fours with my pants off and they all slapped my ass with a leather whip. it hurt like a mother fucking bitch

but still, i liked the fact that i saw my first live pussy[/quote]

And that was a [i]horrible[/i] birthday???

And don’t sweat being 18 without any sex experience - it’s not the end of the world. But Happy Birthday to ya!

[quote]Kuz wrote:
And that was a [i]horrible[/i] birthday???

[/quote]

My thoughts exactly.

Not a whole lot of people are anxious to have boners in public.

If that’s your goal in life, keep trying, I’m sure you’ll get there eventually.

[quote]vroom wrote:
Not a whole lot of people are anxious to have boners in public.

If that’s your goal in life, keep trying, I’m sure you’ll get there eventually.[/quote]

I know it took me a while…but practice makes perfect.

Getting more dollars stuffed in your thong is a HUGE incentive.

A tip: it’s not that easy to get hard with a hundred other dudes around no matter how hot the girl is. Look for a good-looking woman to hook-up with [that you don’t pay] in private.

[quote]jsbrook wrote:
A tip: it’s not that easy to get hard with a hundred other dudes around no matter how hot the girl is. Look for a good-looking woman to hook-up with [that you don’t pay] in private.[/quote]

Yeah. Women like boners.

[quote]Imen de Naars wrote:
Yeah. Women like boners.[/quote]

Well it’s kinda hard to have sex without one.

For my 18th birthday I did a whole lot of nothing, so grats!

[quote]jsbrook wrote:
A tip: it’s not that easy to get hard with a hundred other dudes around…[/quote]

Its not that hard for rrjc…

[quote]PGA wrote:
jsbrook wrote:
A tip: it’s not that easy to get hard with a hundred other dudes around…

Its not that hard for rrjc…[/quote]

Especially when he sees you.

[quote]Professor X wrote:
vroom wrote:
Not a whole lot of people are anxious to have boners in public.

If that’s your goal in life, keep trying, I’m sure you’ll get there eventually.

I know it took me a while…but practice makes perfect.

Getting more dollars stuffed in your thong is a HUGE incentive.[/quote]

I know medical school is expensive but, I hope you were dancing for women when you were wearing that thong Professor.

[quote]Goodfellow wrote:
For my 18th birthday I did a whole lot of nothing, so grats![/quote]

If by not-hing you mean a fat hooker from kazakhstan, then yeah I did a whole lot of nothing too.

[quote]TheSicilian wrote:
Professor X wrote:
vroom wrote:
Not a whole lot of people are anxious to have boners in public.

If that’s your goal in life, keep trying, I’m sure you’ll get there eventually.

I know it took me a while…but practice makes perfect.

Getting more dollars stuffed in your thong is a HUGE incentive.

I know medical school is expensive but, I hope you were dancing for women when you were wearing that thong Professor.
[/quote]

Hahaha, well we have seen pics of him in drag…so you make the call.

[quote]BigRagoo wrote:
Hahaha, well we have seen pics of him in drag…so you make the call.[/quote]

He was the mysterious 3rd stripper at the Duke University party!

[quote]BigRagoo wrote:
Imen de Naars wrote:
Yeah. Women like boners.

Well it’s kinda hard to have sex without one.[/quote]

Yes, that’s why they like them.

[quote]PGA wrote:
BigRagoo wrote:
Hahaha, well we have seen pics of him in drag…so you make the call.

He was the mysterious 3rd stripper at the Duke University party![/quote]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!