http://asp.elitefts.com/qa/training-logs.asp?qid=115451&tid=
While I prefer the Peanut Butter Chip, I defend your right to the Oreo
hahaha
Greatest poem of all time, looks like it just got reposted yesterday on EFS:
Jacked
Finally, this is NOT a meal or snack.
It is just another way to add some JACK.
Sometimes you have to do things to live your dream.
And yes, this may mean eating some cream.
This may not be the best habit to keep,
but remember when the rest of the world is asleep
you will be the one paying the price
as they wake to another day of chicken and rice.
Sometimes you need to eat healthy to stay clean,
but I am here to say you may have to eat like shit to be a machine.
This may be contrary to fact,
but skinny NOTâ??let’s get JACKED.
If you want to grow up to be like the great King Kong,
then mark my words, you may need some Ding Dongs.
Listen up and make sure to get this right.
It all comes down to calories per bite.
Some of you may be saying, “Dave, you are whacked.”
This is okay because Iâ??m almost JACKED.
I have done what I needed to do.
And yes, I remember the picture at the zoo.
To keep from getting decked,
you should get your blood work checked.
A glass, ice cream, and root beer make a floatâ??
just what is needed for a monster bloat.
Please don’t get trapped.
You need to eat big to get JACKED.
There will be times when youâ??ll want to quit.
Walk to the mirror and look through your slits.
Your face is bloated and looks like dread,
but your arms are JACKED, you can’t shave your head.
Eating in class once led to after school detention,
but a must this was to gain water retention.
Go to the store and hit the cookie isle.
Load the cart up with a big giant pile.
When you check out, you will pay the toll.
Never mind, this is the way to get â??swole.â??
The point I am trying to make
is really as simple as eating cake.
Candy bars, subs, and chips are the right track.
A great daily lunch this is to get JACKED.
It has to do with more than getting big.
For some of us, this may mean being a pig.
You see getting lean is a piece of cake.
It is getting big that makes most shake.
The thought of losing their abs
has them all taking jabs.
They need to get in the kitchen and crank up â??back in black.â??
Tear open a box of pop tarts and get JACKED.
They buzzÂbuzzÂbuzz like mosquitoes
when all they need is a bag of Doritos.
I will say this one more time.
What they say and do is such a crime.
They have their ass tied and bound.
Here is a clue â?? fudge round.
Dieting is easy when you set your way.
Adding mass is without a doubt a different day.
They have their way, and I have mine,
but please remember, I walk the line.
They might have been the head of the class,
but they can kiss my JACKED up ass!
THE MAGNIFICENT BLOAT
Bump on my 7 minute 8 second oreo box single stuffed. I’d have video, but my room mate stopped it a minute in, so you can only get to see me eat all of like 8-10 cookies. I blame his mac.
I’ll have to do it again in a couple minutes less next time though, and I WILL have it on video.
[quote]hockechamp14 wrote:
Bump on my 7 minute 8 second oreo box single stuffed. I’d have video, but my room mate stopped it a minute in, so you can only get to see me eat all of like 8-10 cookies. I blame his mac.
I’ll have to do it again in a couple minutes less next time though, and I WILL have it on video.[/quote]
Man The first person I actually see pollish off a whole pack of Oero’s in one shot I will mail off the “GYM” t-shirt of there choice to any address they are willing to post
[quote]hockechamp14 wrote:
Bump on my 7 minute 8 second oreo box single stuffed. I’d have video, but my room mate stopped it a minute in, so you can only get to see me eat all of like 8-10 cookies. I blame his mac.
I’ll have to do it again in a couple minutes less next time though, and I WILL have it on video.[/quote]
not sure if this is a serious post but i could beat that easily.
Haha thanks for sharing. I’ve never tried to polish off an entire pack of oreos, but those things are like crack. So i think it would be fairly easy to do.
Not as easy trust me
Well you could be right, i most likely will never know due to the fact i’m one of those endomorphic types who gains weight easily.
Perhaps for refeed day this sunday i should give it a try and report back.
WHY did I open this thread?
I can never pass up a challenge.
Especially one that involves food.
Uh yeah, I could house a package of oreos with no problem. But you can’t eat oreos without alternating b/w eating them hole, twisting apart and dunking. That contest ain’t for me.
I could do it!
I would prefer a birthday cake challenge however. Or cinnamon melts.
Apple pie challenge.
Or pie of any kind.
Nice. Currently cutting, but maybe this winter I’ll try this on a REALLY dirty bulk.
you can really tell he is in love with junk food.
[quote]debraD wrote:
Or cinnamon melts.
[/quote]
these sounds delightful.
guy who doesn’t have access to these cry’s
I have no sweet tooth. You are all talking Greek to me.
[quote]RBlue wrote:
Or pie of any kind.[/quote]
Almost disappointed in T-Nation that no one took advantage of this layup…
I mean, do you not have 3-7 bad jokes running through your minds?
If you want a challenge, lay the cookies out on a naked women covering all vital areas. Or Women, lay the Oreo’s down on a man on all vital areas. And see how long it will take you to eat every single one, trying to resist that urge to pounce on your prey, the Oreo’s that is.