T Nation

Movie Etiquette

I went and saw the Spidy 3 flick last night. Movie theater was almost full except for the neck brace seats so me and my friend sat in the back row. It was hot as hell in there and of course, I had the pleasure of sharing my immediate surroundings with an infant.

First of all, why would you bring an infant to the theater? If you can’t afford a baby sitter then go catch a matinee and spent the money you save on someone to watch your damn kid. Do you really expect the child to be quiet during a 2.5 hour movie? Waiving some fucking puppet at her did not work and of course the genius did not think to bring a damn pacifier.

This all takes place in the row right in front of me a few seats to the right. There were two women, two guys, the infant and a 3 or 4 year old kid. Not only did the baby cry for a lot of the movie, the kid was talking a lot of the time, as were the adults in addition to playing with their cell phones.

I cannot believe the people right behind them did not say anything or the ones in front whose seat kept getting banged by the baby seat. When the baby kept crying I made a comment or two and the lady finally took the kid for a walk, but this was 40 minutes into the movie. Me and my friend were so pissed and it took every ounch of self-restraint to keep my composure.

Then the behavior spread like a plague and the people behind them whose movie was ruined started checking cell phones and goofing off. I made another general comment about this movie being ruined but the fuckers of course had no response. When the movie was over I was going to ask the guy for my twenty bucks back but instead I did a serious Goosfraba and waited for a minute or so. Neither one of the adults even looked in my direction so I walked away.

So what would you have done? The people obviously were too fucking ghetto to speak rationally to and that would have likely led to an altercation. No problem there but I was with someone and that would have been disrespectful and embarassing to her.

Plus, am I going to beat up this fucking low life in front of his three year old daughter? What would that have made me? Going to get an usher seemed gay and would have taken a good 10 minutes. Moving was not an option since it was full and I was not about to sit on the front row. I guess we could have left and asked the theater for a refund but why should I have to leave?

A

I’m with ya on this, and it’s why I refuse to go see movies the first couple of weeks they are out. Unfortuantely with movies like Spider-Man that are marketed towards children, you’re going to run into this kind of problem. Like you said, getting into an altercation with the people wouldn’t solve anything.

Aside from complaining to the manager and asking from a refund, there really isn’t much you can do, even though you have every right to be upset.

Maybe someone will create an adults-only movie theater and we can enjoy our movies in peace.

Yeah, I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking going on opening weekend.

Spiderman was rated pg 13 though so these kids were just dragged along for the parents sake only, plus the toddler gets to see stuff she has no business of seeing in the first place.

Yeah I was thinking of talking to the “manager” but we had stayed and watched the flick plus this kid looked young enough to still be in high school, which he probably was. Had he said anything but “sure here is a refund” I am afraid I would have laid into the poor kid.

A

[quote]Djwlfpack wrote:
I’m with ya on this, and it’s why I refuse to go see movies the first couple of weeks they are out. Unfortuantely with movies like Spider-Man that are marketed towards children, you’re going to run into this kind of problem. Like you said, getting into an altercation with the people wouldn’t solve anything.

Aside from complaining to the manager and asking from a refund, there really isn’t much you can do, even though you have every right to be upset.

Maybe someone will create an adults-only movie theater and we can enjoy our movies in peace.[/quote]

I feel for ya. I don’t know why people insist on taking their kids with them everywhere they go, like fashion accessories. If you can’t find a babysitter, show some class and wait for the DVD.

I took my 5-year old to see the same flick opening night, but he’s very well-behaved and didn’t make a peep. He did have to pee 3 times during the movie though.

[quote] I guess we could have left and asked the theater for a refund but why should I have to leave?

A[/quote]

You don’t HAVE to leave but why stay once the movie is ruined and you’re already pissed off? People are fucking rude everywhere ya’ go and there is not a damn thing you can do about it. I would have gotten a refund and left.

When I went to see 300 there was a 400lb. fat ass guy sitting just in front of me. During every fight scene he would loudly proclaim to his wife/girlfriend “Those bodies aren’t real, there’s no way a guy can look like that” or “There is no reason to work out, it’s impossible to look like that” Just trying to justify being fat and really ruined the whole movie.

I got up to leave and somehow spilled my Diet Coke all over him. I’m such a klutz sometimes.

Do people seriously give a guy your size shit?

There are some dumb people.

Dude, you have no idea how bad I wanted to give this guy a piece of my mind after the movie was over. My friend, who knows me very well, already kind of started walking when she saw I did not get up right away. So I guess I scored a moral victory here, haha.

[quote]Ghost22 wrote:
Do people seriously give a guy your size shit?

There are some dumb people. [/quote]

That’s the key, well behaved. And I am sure that if he was not behaving, you would have addressed it. Even the little girl was just talking a lot and the parents did not reprimand her at all.

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
I feel for ya. I don’t know why people insist on taking their kids with them everywhere they go, like fashion accessories. If you can’t find a babysitter, show some class and wait for the DVD.

I took my 5-year old to see the same flick opening night, but he’s very well-behaved and didn’t make a peep. He did have to pee 3 times during the movie though.[/quote]

This is why I never watch a movie on the weekend. Late shows (9pm or later) on week nights, the way to go.

I made the mistake of going on opening night. The teen-age girls behind me never shut up. I did hear some toddler kid in the theater also. Why would anyone bring a toddler or infant to a movie? Isn’t that one of those things everyone knows you’re not supposed to do?

Yeah, I threw in the towel many years ago. For me, going to see movies anytime before the 3rd week after release is just asking for trouble. The probability of frustration, irritation, rise in blood pressure, and potential for a violent altercation are much too high for me.

I can still get enraged in a mostly empty theater, though. The morons who bring babies are bad enough, but what I’ve come to hate more are the groups who must sit either directly in front or directly behind you in an otherwise COMPLETELY EMPTY THEATER! DAMN THEM TO HELL!!!

I’m embarrassed to say that, yes, I usually do make a scene when they do this (“Come on, kids, I guess WE’LL have to move since THESE PEOPLE can’t seem to find ANY OTHER SEATS in this COMPLETELY EMPTY THEATER! BOY, they sure aren’t very smart!”…or something like that).

…yeah, this bugs me.

Having children of my own, I understand why people bring their children. You dont want to leave your child with just ANYBODY and sometimes a babysitter is not available.

On the other hand, it is impolite to bring your child to movies that are unlikely to absorb him/her, because you know that, sooner or later, s/he is going to start doing something distracting.

At these really big movie theaters, where the same movie gets played many times per day, they should have a couple of showings which exclude kids, say, under 12.

I think adults are just as bad as kids. One of my dumbass friends actually answered his phone during a movie. I could not believe it and told him exactly how I felt about it. The most annoying thing is half of the audience is texting on their cell phone.

I do what someone else said, wait a couple weeks to see the movie. I think it also depends what theater you go to as well.

Some idiotic fuckwads insist on talking through and commenting on the entire movie. Years ago I made the mistake of going to see “Blade” in a full theater. The two twenty-something girls sitting a few rows behind me filled the WHOLE movie with callouts to the screen like, “Wesley ain’t daaaaay-ud!!!” (when it looked like Wesley Snipes’ character might’ve been killed).

A friend of mine tells a story about a movie he saw once where a couple was sitting behind him and the husband would semi-whisper to the wife the whole time, TRANSLATING EVERY LINE INTO SPANISH FOR HER.

Some people should just be taken out back and shot.

[quote]Amsterdam Animal wrote:

So what would you have done? The people obviously were too fucking ghetto to speak rationally to and that would have likely led to an altercation. No problem there but I was with someone and that would have been disrespectful and embarassing to her.

Plus, am I going to beat up this fucking low life in front of his three year old daughter? What would that have made me? Going to get an usher seemed gay and would have taken a good 10 minutes. Moving was not an option since it was full and I was not about to sit on the front row. I guess we could have left and asked the theater for a refund but why should I have to leave?

A[/quote]

Fellow Beneluxer, I know how you feel.

I’m a teacher and it bugs a fucking great deal when people can’t control their kids. I usually almost burst in frustration too, but now I force myself to make it a habit to take the parent calmly by the arm or wrist(NOTE : I actually do this - also on other occasions like in a theathers), and ask them on a calm but strong tone to "make sure that they keep their child under control, so everyone can enjoy the movie, including their child itself.

If otherwise, it would be best to go for a walk and allow the rest of the audience to enjoy their money’s worth."

I’ve used this more times than I can remember, and one time(during a play), I even got a thank you from the actors on stage.

Learn it by heart and use it plentily. (how hard you grab the wrist is up to you)

People in the theatre are so rude. When I saw Pirates of the Caribbean 2, there was this jack ass behind me who, throughout the ENTIRE movie, kept saying “Jack Sparrow!”

I remember as a kid going to certain theatres who had a room in the back with glass for moms and their kids. If you came with anyone under 10, you had to sit there.

I know how you feel man! Shit sucks either way.

On your original message when you said, “If I beat the guy in front his three year old, what kind of person would that make me?”

I know this isn’t realistic, but maybe the guy needed to get his head kicked in in front of his kids so A)He doesn’t do that stupid shit again and B) his kid won’t do that same type of shit.

I know I’m just wishful thinking here, but if the parents are too stupid to realize what they’re teaching their kids, then they need to be taught a lesson.

Kudos, on keepin it cool though. You’re a better man than I!

Sadly, you cannot control the scum of the earth. You just have to plan your life around them.

The other day I was at the dog park. A dog took the toy my dog and I were playing with and ran away with it. The dog’s owners were such low-lifes they couldn’t control their dog to retrieve the toy. The dog kept running away from them. I said to them, “Your dog is like a hyena. You should have control over him. You need to start training him.”

Their answer: “Don’t bring a toy to the park.” I said, “Well, I don’t mind if other dogs play with the toy, but I need to leave.”

Finally, I said, “Hey, I need to get my dog a new toy, anyway. They are $20 new. Since your dog likes the toy, give me $10 and we’ll call it even.”

This sent her over the top. (Her boyfriend just cowered and said nothing like the little bitch that he was!) “I would never paid $10 for that piece of shit toy.” When I said, “Well, your dog seems to like. Take personal responsibly. It’s not your dogs fault he’s not trained,” she said “I’ll get it from him when we leave and leave it here for you.”

I said, “You’re bad people. I don’t want anything to do with you” and walked away.

It’s a typical day in the life, unfortunately, which is why I avoid other people whenever practical.

I had some guy in back of me sing all the show tunes during the coming attraction and coke advertisements. I was going to kill him if he did it during the movie. He didn’t. He’s still alive and I’m not in prison.

I woulda went Costanza on him. lol.

“Cause I would love it!”

[quote]btm62 wrote:
I had some guy in back of me sing all the show tunes during the coming attraction and coke advertisements. I was going to kill him if he did it during the movie. He didn’t. He’s still alive and I’m not in prison.

I woulda went Costanza on him. lol.

“Cause I would love it!”[/quote]

Er, sorry about that. I like show tunes.