T Nation

Most Ridiculous Marketing

Which company and/or product has the most ridiculous (as in bogus or shitty) marketing out there?

Discuss

Lots of them do. Is it worth picking them out individually?

Ones i dislike are the ones that just say something irrelevant like “Joe Bodybuilder knows he needs energising for his workout to be at the top of his game” with a pro pic and then the product along with a flimsy paragraph and NO explanation of why the product will do anything for you at all! Just traying to sell it on endorsement and ‘cool’.

On a similar theme, and you may guess this one, a cool two tone picture of a BBer looking like a tough dude in a tough place with some supposedly inspiring words below it along the lines “yeah, lifes a bitch, we’re so tough and so apart from the mainstream, man!” all like some badly written teen angst song

Then the infamous before and after shots, which really should say “before i had bad lighting and stood relaxed but after taking product x I have a tan, better lighting and check out the little twist i’ve put into my pose!”

Then there’s the over the top ‘science’ 4 page ad ‘reports’. For all the excitement it should really have one word on each page “This. Is. Just. Protein!”

The adverts i can respect more are the ones that rely less on ‘cool’ and pro BBer endorsement and more on facts - e.g. quality of ingredients, amount per serving etc. That’s probably mundane to the marketing department but the rest is just noise to me.

Musle Asylum Project and another brand (same company) are pretty over the top. I love the new ad that says: "660% MORE MASS!. Cracks me up everytime.

It is just something to discuss

i hate the 5 page “science reports” with the cartoonish cells and its like a comic book strip

One company is does that quite a lot

It is just a discussion topic

Well from a marketing perspective the ones which you call “shitty” sell the most, and make the most money. So its actually good marketing.

I know what you mean though, the statements and claims made are just completely fabricated. The Bsn cell mass and no xplode always give me a chuckle when I see them in magazines.

cartoon cell ads…i just shake my head

Didn’t EAS say one of their products was “just like DECA!”

My Favorite was this one by “Rev EP HARDCOR” Slash your bodyfat by 12.3%" And of course people think that you can decrease your bodyfat by 12.3 Percentage points rather than the truth which means you can decrease you curent bodyfat% by 12.3 percent!

Example you starting bodyfat is 20% You will NOT reduce you body fat to 7.7% However thats what they lead you to beleive but in reality if you do loose 12.3% of 20% bodyfat your new bodyfat will be 17.54%…you get the Idea and of cource they have some light heavyweight bodybuilder there on the product with his shirt of @ aruond 5% saying “It worked for me”…Sure…they wont get my monney

I’d also add those adverts for “products” that sound like AAS brand names: ‘winni-v’ ‘dana-bol’ etc. You know the ones, I feel bad for anyone buying that.

Goodness know what they actually contain.

Noticed in MD they run those, also saw an ad for pills to, erm, enhance the size of your dick. Even a pic of the ‘doctor’ who made the breakthrough discovery, he’s got a white coat on so it must be true!

[quote]Rhino Jockey wrote:
Musle Asylum Project and another brand (same company) are pretty over the top. I love the new ad that says: "660% MORE MASS!. Cracks me up everytime. [/quote]

If there was ever a kitchen sink supplement, it has to be that Muscle Asylum shit. The ingredient list for that crap covers the entire label!

After seeing Bigger Faster Stronger*, I’ll never take any ad with before and after pictures seriously again (and I didn’t in the first place lol).

My favorite involves a company that uses liquid nitrogen to “enhance” the effect of some anabolic compound. And in they add they demonstrate the power of the liquid nitrogen by showing pictures of freezing and shattering some 45lbs plates. What the heck does shattering plates have anything to do with anything?

Another good one is Novedex lol I mean really gimme a break!

My favorite is “the company” :stuck_out_tongue: with the N*NO vaper and how it says to “not shake the tub or the contents will EXPLODE!” lol

DG

That company cracks me the hell up. Those adds are unreal - literally.

DJ

[quote]djreef wrote:
That company cracks me the hell up. Those adds are unreal - literally.

DJ[/quote]

And people actually think their products are the best! I work for a nutrishop and I couldn’t tell you the amount of people who come in there claiming that no-explode, etc is the closest thing to steroids you could get. (slaps self on forehead)

I mean these ads are funny to the experienced, but to the noob’s out there they really do work on them…it is a sad world we live in lol :stuck_out_tongue:

DG

[quote]BradyZ wrote:
Didn’t EAS say one of their products was “just like DECA!”[/quote]

Yeah and then there are one’s that say gives you legal performance enhancement (the word legal being in italics).

also, some give you some bogus non-important reason why their basic ingredient is better because it comes from NORTHERN Czechoslovakia or some ridiculous thing like that…yeah like geography has anything to do with anything.

[quote]DoubleDuce wrote:
My favorite involves a company that uses liquid nitrogen to “enhance” the effect of some anabolic compound. And in they add they demonstrate the power of the liquid nitrogen by showing pictures of freezing and shattering some 45lbs plates. What the heck does shattering plates have anything to do with anything?[/quote]

That is awesome. If I take enough of that stuff, could I become Mr. Freeze?

I make my own retail protein powder.

Here are the directions:

Finish Metabolic Drive tub off

Take Tub’s cover off

Print out “DA STUFF” in large text and tape it to the tub

Fill tub with flour

The end.

A company with a number of stars in its name whose printed adds show a guy whose dragon tattoo takes over his body and turns his eyes black

I dont know about you, but that turns me off from the product

i dont want any of my tattoos coming to life!