Met a Girl w/ No Straight Guy Friends

[quote]optheta wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]Waylon Benning wrote:
Meet women who are past their college years. College girls don’t know what they want.[/quote]

bad advice. You’re 19. You don’t know what you want either. So it’s perfect.

Here’s what I read in your OP: “I just met a hot college chick who likes to get down with pretty much anyone regardless of their sexual preference. So basically a regular hot college chick. Should I just whip it out, or talk to her first and then whip it out, or ask my mom what I should do or what?”

In other words, have fun, don’t get an STD. Don’t chase a commitment if she’ll put out regardless (obvi she will)

Please ignore anyone who wants to direct you to a PUA reference. That shit is so dumb.[/quote]

I seriously think you guys who Bash PUA stuff have only read “The Game” and just assume that that’s PUA still do. Which is really really wrong.
[/quote]

You seriously think wrong. I fully understand that the PUA community has a huuuuge variety of dudes in it with varying lessons. All you have to do is look at a lineup of these guys and you can see that.

I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]optheta wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]Waylon Benning wrote:
Meet women who are past their college years. College girls don’t know what they want.[/quote]

bad advice. You’re 19. You don’t know what you want either. So it’s perfect.

Here’s what I read in your OP: “I just met a hot college chick who likes to get down with pretty much anyone regardless of their sexual preference. So basically a regular hot college chick. Should I just whip it out, or talk to her first and then whip it out, or ask my mom what I should do or what?”

In other words, have fun, don’t get an STD. Don’t chase a commitment if she’ll put out regardless (obvi she will)

Please ignore anyone who wants to direct you to a PUA reference. That shit is so dumb.[/quote]

I seriously think you guys who Bash PUA stuff have only read “The Game” and just assume that that’s PUA still do. Which is really really wrong.
[/quote]

You seriously think wrong. I fully understand that the PUA community has a huuuuge variety of dudes in it with varying lessons. All you have to do is look at a lineup of these guys and you can see that.

I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

What he said.

Plus, you have to love adding to your own awesomeness just for your own pleasure. Wanna learn a new language? Go for it. Pick up some other skill? Yup. Going after intrinsic motivation (or what I think is intrinsic, it’s hard knowing for ‘sure’ what really sparked your interest) is key.

People will notice you, game among them, too, but sexual attraction is just one tiny aspect of it. I can’t speak for others, but the fact that I don’t even care for this attention (apart from certain scenarios) seems to make me even more attractive. Usually, when I go to a party, or a conference or just someplace, be it alone or with friends, I happen to be the center of attention, rather sooner than later. It’s not that I’m pushing for it, my environment usually makes me, although I’d be perfectly comfy just watching and absorbing my surroundings.

All PUA followers/practitioners I’ve met so far have struck me as insecure. I didn’t even need to cold-read them to know and feel that. They’re rather easy to manipulate and remind me of cult members. It’s fascinating how easy it is to build a rapport (lol) with them and how they confess to having been very insecure since puberty, masking said insecurity in the usual ways. I’m proud to say I’ve steered some of those guys into the direction of more autonomous ways of self-discovery and enhancement, for lack of better wording.

[quote]FattyFat wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]optheta wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]Waylon Benning wrote:
Meet women who are past their college years. College girls don’t know what they want.[/quote]

bad advice. You’re 19. You don’t know what you want either. So it’s perfect.

Here’s what I read in your OP: “I just met a hot college chick who likes to get down with pretty much anyone regardless of their sexual preference. So basically a regular hot college chick. Should I just whip it out, or talk to her first and then whip it out, or ask my mom what I should do or what?”

In other words, have fun, don’t get an STD. Don’t chase a commitment if she’ll put out regardless (obvi she will)

Please ignore anyone who wants to direct you to a PUA reference. That shit is so dumb.[/quote]

I seriously think you guys who Bash PUA stuff have only read “The Game” and just assume that that’s PUA still do. Which is really really wrong.
[/quote]

You seriously think wrong. I fully understand that the PUA community has a huuuuge variety of dudes in it with varying lessons. All you have to do is look at a lineup of these guys and you can see that.

I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

What he said.

Plus, you have to love adding to your own awesomeness just for your own pleasure. Wanna learn a new language? Go for it. Pick up some other skill? Yup. Going after intrinsic motivation (or what I think is intrinsic, it’s hard knowing for ‘sure’ what really sparked your interest) is key.

People will notice you, game among them, too, but sexual attraction is just one tiny aspect of it. I can’t speak for others, but the fact that I don’t even care for this attention (apart from certain scenarios) seems to make me even more attractive. Usually, when I go to a party, or a conference or just someplace, be it alone or with friends, I happen to be the center of attention, rather sooner than later. It’s not that I’m pushing for it, my environment usually makes me, although I’d be perfectly comfy just watching and absorbing my surroundings.

All PUA followers/practitioners I’ve met so far have struck me as insecure. I didn’t even need to cold-read them to know and feel that. They’re rather easy to manipulate and remind me of cult members. It’s fascinating how easy it is to build a rapport (lol) with them and how they confess to having been very insecure since puberty, masking said insecurity in the usual ways. I’m proud to say I’ve steered some of those guys into the direction of more autonomous ways of self-discovery and enhancement, for lack of better wording.

[/quote]

Look at what you just wrote and, maybe, try again.

YOur game told you they had none, perception biases, please…

Yeah, the people you notice are “rather easy to manipulate, wha, wha ,wha”… What does it say about YOU that the people you notice are rather easy to manipulate?

What about the ones you dont notice, playing you?

If they are even interested that is, they are probably not.

But no, you are standing on the top of the mountain, you see it all.

You could not possibly be on so low a hill that all the PUwannabeA´s you actually can see indeed do suck?

if i can’t pick up a girl by being myself i don’t want to be with her in the first place. If you just want randoms find dirtiest bar in town walk in at 2 am and take your pick.

i’m engaged now so i don’t need to worry about that shit but same principle applies

Saying that it takes time and dedication to be a truly attractive person - but don’t do any of that PUA stuff is like saying it takes time and dedication to build a solid physique - but don’t do any of that bodybuilding stuff.

In the end it’s all self improvement. Say the word bodybuilding and some people think swole douchbag wearing neon polka-dot baggy pants, spaghetti string tank top and a doo rag. Say the work PUA and some people think douchbag wearing fuzzy vest, thumb rings <<>>.

Bodybuilders just started lifting because they have little dicks, so they’re compensating. PUA’s are all insecure and easy to manipulate.

Just go to the gym and LIFT, Squats and Milk, I don’t understand why these idiots don’t just go the gym and TRAIN - they’ll figure it out. Just go up to a girl and TALK TO HER. I mean, you don’t need ‘routines’ or a wingman - just be yourself!

All they have is these stupid body building magazines with the latest triple, awesome split that XYZ bodybuilder is doing - but if a regular joe tried that (unless he was shooting up tons of gear) he’d be overtrained in two weeks. All they have is these stupid websites with idiots telling you to walk up to girls and ask them if the rockstar David Bowie is hot. I mean if a regular guy tried that, he’d get shot down nine out of ten times.

All you see is supplement companies promising products to lose fat in ten days, or gain 50 pounds on your bench in two weeks, or drink this shake and gain muscle like never before! - it’s all a bunch of BS to take advantage of people who just don’t get it. All you see is these douchbags charging money for programs on bodylanguage, openers, pick up lines, how to set up a threesome, etc… I mean it’s all a bunch of bullshit taking advantage of luvable losers.

Many people start bodybuilding so that they are more attractive to the opposite sex. Many people start PUA so they can attract the opposite sex. (I would submit for your consideration that just about EVERYTHING we do has something to do with the opposite sex)

I could go on and on drawing stereotypical correlations between bodybuilding and PUA. In the end, it’s ALL just selfish masturbation (or an individual’s vision on how to be a better man). Both have hundreds of thousands of “followers”. Both have advertisers who make ridiculous claims. Both require dedication and practice to get good at. Both offer some path to self improvement. Sometimes you have to wade through bullshit to find the gold in BOTH. Both are equally valid in their own right.

Just like SOME bodybuilding ideas/programs work, SOME of the PUA stuff works as well. You can’t just paint it with a broad brush and dismiss it as a bunch of insecure douchebags. Just like you can’t paint bodybuilding with a broad brush and say they’re all a bunch of little dicked steroid freaks.

Hi there, buddy :wink:
Nice meeting you here, of all places. Wie geht’s Dir, alter Halunke?

I had a feeling you’d chime in at this one, but I wouldn’t have guessed it’d strike such a nerve.

I should’ve said: all the PUA guys I’ve met and recognized. I’m not claiming I’m not manipulable, nor did I say so - quite the foolhardy thing to read into a simple post on a message board.

Not standing on a mountain, just enjoying the view. It’s a long way up, should that be the way I’d feel like going, but also a long way down.
Also, funny how you’re thinking yourself capable of assessing me by my, if I may say so, rather abstract and general comments on PUA made on a messaging board as opposed to me assessing people I’ve met and spent time with in real life (and thus having gathered concrete data). You have a nice day.

[quote]orion wrote:

[quote]FattyFat wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]optheta wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:

[quote]Waylon Benning wrote:
Meet women who are past their college years. College girls don’t know what they want.[/quote]

bad advice. You’re 19. You don’t know what you want either. So it’s perfect.

Here’s what I read in your OP: “I just met a hot college chick who likes to get down with pretty much anyone regardless of their sexual preference. So basically a regular hot college chick. Should I just whip it out, or talk to her first and then whip it out, or ask my mom what I should do or what?”

In other words, have fun, don’t get an STD. Don’t chase a commitment if she’ll put out regardless (obvi she will)

Please ignore anyone who wants to direct you to a PUA reference. That shit is so dumb.[/quote]

I seriously think you guys who Bash PUA stuff have only read “The Game” and just assume that that’s PUA still do. Which is really really wrong.
[/quote]

You seriously think wrong. I fully understand that the PUA community has a huuuuge variety of dudes in it with varying lessons. All you have to do is look at a lineup of these guys and you can see that.

I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

What he said.

Plus, you have to love adding to your own awesomeness just for your own pleasure. Wanna learn a new language? Go for it. Pick up some other skill? Yup. Going after intrinsic motivation (or what I think is intrinsic, it’s hard knowing for ‘sure’ what really sparked your interest) is key.

People will notice you, game among them, too, but sexual attraction is just one tiny aspect of it. I can’t speak for others, but the fact that I don’t even care for this attention (apart from certain scenarios) seems to make me even more attractive. Usually, when I go to a party, or a conference or just someplace, be it alone or with friends, I happen to be the center of attention, rather sooner than later. It’s not that I’m pushing for it, my environment usually makes me, although I’d be perfectly comfy just watching and absorbing my surroundings.

All PUA followers/practitioners I’ve met so far have struck me as insecure. I didn’t even need to cold-read them to know and feel that. They’re rather easy to manipulate and remind me of cult members. It’s fascinating how easy it is to build a rapport (lol) with them and how they confess to having been very insecure since puberty, masking said insecurity in the usual ways. I’m proud to say I’ve steered some of those guys into the direction of more autonomous ways of self-discovery and enhancement, for lack of better wording.

[/quote]

Look at what you just wrote and, maybe, try again.

YOur game told you they had none, perception biases, please…

Yeah, the people you notice are “rather easy to manipulate, wha, wha ,wha”… What does it say about YOU that the people you notice are rather easy to manipulate?

What about the ones you dont notice, playing you?

If they are even interested that is, they are probably not.

But no, you are standing on the top of the mountain, you see it all.

You could not possibly be on so low a hill that all the PUwannabeA�?�´s you actually can see indeed do suck?

[/quote]

Lmao there will be no 3 ways unless it’s 2 girls and me

[quote]flipcollar wrote:
and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

Nah. Innate empathy and charisma will more than suffice.

[quote]FattyFat wrote:
Usually, when I go to a party, or a conference or just someplace, be it alone or with friends, I happen to be the center of attention, rather sooner than later.
[/quote]

Dude. When you post something like this, chances are someone’s gonna say something.

[quote]flipcollar wrote:
I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

Ah, if it were only that easy. Just because something is easy for you doesn’t mean it is easy for everyone else.

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:
This goes almost exactly with “Does your GF/wife have male friends or whatever”…I’m 19, freshman in college. I just meet a pretty cool girl who is way out of my league good looking and we hit it off. She has literally zero straight guy friends, but she showed me this video of last weekend where she was intensely making out with one of her gay friends. I don’t want to follow her around to every party nor do I want her to follow me around, so this isn’t an option. But is this a reason to ask questions or just leave it alone?[/quote]

What does “hit it off” mean? Are you in the friend zone or are you tapping it?

If you are tapping it, the response from me would have been, “wow, after he got you all riled up, we should have fucked, saved me the whole foreplay thing.”[/quote]
We’re fuck buddies[/quote]

She was fishing a reaction/for dominance over you. If your response was anything more or less than “not giving a fuck” in some fashion, you lost.

In a normal girl, this was “I care about him, let’s see if he’s jealous/cares about me.”

In a ho (which this girl is), this was “let’s see if I can shock him and dump him or make him my puppy.”

All that said, bi-sexual men are the highest carriers of STDs in the world. They get both kinds, have the most sex and the dumbest sex. Girls that fuck them are the no. 2 cariers of STDs.

So, I wouldn’t touch this chick, and I am not exactly known for my discretion.[/quote]

This seems like pretty reasonable advice IMO. That said, I don’t really understand your question in your original post. What are you trying to accomplish in this situation and what are you unsure of?

Apologies if I’m being a little slow. Humour me.

[quote]nephorm wrote:

[quote]flipcollar wrote:
I don’t like any of it, and personally have no use for it. Game is stupidly easy. There’s way too much detail in these teachings. If you want to get girls in any capacity, just become an interesting person. Be better than your competition, and if you’re not, too bad. The people who pay attention to the PUA stuff remind me of the dudes who come on this site wanting someone to write them a program for getting 18" biceps. In both cases, the real answer is taking the time to cultivate awesomeness. Getting huge in the gym takes time and dedication, and becoming a truly attractive person takes time and dedication.[/quote]

Ah, if it were only that easy. Just because something is easy for you doesn’t mean it is easy for everyone else. [/quote]

Dude, his entire point is that it isn’t easy, unless you’re born with it.

[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
Dude, his entire point is that it isn’t easy, unless you’re born with it.[/quote]

Would you prefer “easier said than done?”
He said that game is “stupidly easy.” All ya gotta do is: BECOME AWESOME.

Becoming a better, more skilled, educated, well-rounded person is good. As if that task weren’t hard enough, do I think that plan is going to, by itself, lead to “good game?” No.

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:
This goes almost exactly with “Does your GF/wife have male friends or whatever”…I’m 19, freshman in college. I just meet a pretty cool girl who is way out of my league good looking and we hit it off. She has literally zero straight guy friends, but she showed me this video of last weekend where she was intensely making out with one of her gay friends. I don’t want to follow her around to every party nor do I want her to follow me around, so this isn’t an option. But is this a reason to ask questions or just leave it alone?[/quote]

What does “hit it off” mean? Are you in the friend zone or are you tapping it?

If you are tapping it, the response from me would have been, “wow, after he got you all riled up, we should have fucked, saved me the whole foreplay thing.”[/quote]
We’re fuck buddies[/quote]

She was fishing a reaction/for dominance over you. If your response was anything more or less than “not giving a fuck” in some fashion, you lost.

In a normal girl, this was “I care about him, let’s see if he’s jealous/cares about me.”

In a ho (which this girl is), this was “let’s see if I can shock him and dump him or make him my puppy.”

All that said, bi-sexual men are the highest carriers of STDs in the world. They get both kinds, have the most sex and the dumbest sex. Girls that fuck them are the no. 2 cariers of STDs.

So, I wouldn’t touch this chick, and I am not exactly known for my discretion.[/quote]

This seems like pretty reasonable advice IMO. That said, I don’t really understand your question in your original post. What are you trying to accomplish in this situation and what are you unsure of?

Apologies if I’m being a little slow. Humour me.[/quote]
Idk what I should do about this girl…sketchy business

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:
This goes almost exactly with “Does your GF/wife have male friends or whatever”…I’m 19, freshman in college. I just meet a pretty cool girl who is way out of my league good looking and we hit it off. She has literally zero straight guy friends, but she showed me this video of last weekend where she was intensely making out with one of her gay friends. I don’t want to follow her around to every party nor do I want her to follow me around, so this isn’t an option. But is this a reason to ask questions or just leave it alone?[/quote]

What does “hit it off” mean? Are you in the friend zone or are you tapping it?

If you are tapping it, the response from me would have been, “wow, after he got you all riled up, we should have fucked, saved me the whole foreplay thing.”[/quote]
We’re fuck buddies[/quote]

She was fishing a reaction/for dominance over you. If your response was anything more or less than “not giving a fuck” in some fashion, you lost.

In a normal girl, this was “I care about him, let’s see if he’s jealous/cares about me.”

In a ho (which this girl is), this was “let’s see if I can shock him and dump him or make him my puppy.”

All that said, bi-sexual men are the highest carriers of STDs in the world. They get both kinds, have the most sex and the dumbest sex. Girls that fuck them are the no. 2 cariers of STDs.

So, I wouldn’t touch this chick, and I am not exactly known for my discretion.[/quote]

This seems like pretty reasonable advice IMO. That said, I don’t really understand your question in your original post. What are you trying to accomplish in this situation and what are you unsure of?

Apologies if I’m being a little slow. Humour me.[/quote]
Idk what I should do about this girl…sketchy business[/quote]

You first need to get an idea what YOU want. -Relationship, fuckslut or something in between/light dating.

For whatever reason I’ve found it a bad sign when they have lots of friends with the ghey.

From the little you’ve told us I’d let it run how it is and try and stay on good terms even if you stop screwing, - smoking hot girls are always a useful social resource

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]batman730 wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:

[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:

[quote]chobbs wrote:
This goes almost exactly with “Does your GF/wife have male friends or whatever”…I’m 19, freshman in college. I just meet a pretty cool girl who is way out of my league good looking and we hit it off. She has literally zero straight guy friends, but she showed me this video of last weekend where she was intensely making out with one of her gay friends. I don’t want to follow her around to every party nor do I want her to follow me around, so this isn’t an option. But is this a reason to ask questions or just leave it alone?[/quote]

What does “hit it off” mean? Are you in the friend zone or are you tapping it?

If you are tapping it, the response from me would have been, “wow, after he got you all riled up, we should have fucked, saved me the whole foreplay thing.”[/quote]
We’re fuck buddies[/quote]

She was fishing a reaction/for dominance over you. If your response was anything more or less than “not giving a fuck” in some fashion, you lost.

In a normal girl, this was “I care about him, let’s see if he’s jealous/cares about me.”

In a ho (which this girl is), this was “let’s see if I can shock him and dump him or make him my puppy.”

All that said, bi-sexual men are the highest carriers of STDs in the world. They get both kinds, have the most sex and the dumbest sex. Girls that fuck them are the no. 2 cariers of STDs.

So, I wouldn’t touch this chick, and I am not exactly known for my discretion.[/quote]

This seems like pretty reasonable advice IMO. That said, I don’t really understand your question in your original post. What are you trying to accomplish in this situation and what are you unsure of?

Apologies if I’m being a little slow. Humour me.[/quote]
Idk what I should do about this girl…sketchy business[/quote]

Ah… well then I would refer you back to thirdruff’s above post. The likelihood that this girl is highly promiscuous and at least somewhat careless sometimes (or an ho if you prefer) is fairly good. The statistical likelihood that she has at least one STD (herpes) is approximately 1 in 4. I would say slightly higher for her given the aforementioned carelessness and promiscuity, her propensity to mess around with higher risk groups of people and the fact that she is a woman (which makes her more susceptible).

If she does have it the likelihood she doesn’t even know it even if she were inclined to tell you is 80-90%. Condoms are not great at protecting against this (about 30%) as your balls will be rubbing up on her (possibly infected) junk. Still, they say your chance of catching it is only about 4%. However, of the dudes I know who all slept with a chick I know who has it (before she knew she had it), about 25-30% got it. Take from that what you will.

Herpes is not the end of the world, but if you do get it you get to spend the rest of your single life being the guy who a) has to tell every girl he sleeps with he has it before he sleeps with her or b) doesn’t tell her. It also makes it 2-5x more likely that you will catch HIV later on.

Don’t mean to be a buzz kill, but sex with sketchy girls is risky business. Unfortunately, sketchy girls are most likely to have sex with you in an NSA type of context. Catch-22, I know. Shouldn’t kid yourself though.

All the best.

[quote]chillain wrote:

[quote]FattyFat wrote:
Usually, when I go to a party, or a conference or just someplace, be it alone or with friends, I happen to be the center of attention, rather sooner than later.
[/quote]

Dude. When you post something like this, chances are someone’s gonna say something.

[/quote]

Well said, chillain.
I expected something along the lines of what orion said (and I also expected him to chime in on this). I was also aware how my words could (and most certainly would) come across.

For the sake of the whole confidence tangent to this thread, I want to make absolutely clear that I’m in no way conceited, nor imagining things, just sharing my own experience. Nor is what I stated positive through and through, since, every once in a while, you just don’t want to be noticed over someone else (say, you’re out with someone rather insecure and don’t want to be overshadowing that person in any way) - sure, you can always redirect the attention away from you and on to other people, but if you’re with someone who intimately knows you, chances are, he or she would notice.

Also, I’d like to add that, whilst being in the center of attention, I make it a priority to divulge as little substantial data about myself as possible, while mirroring emotional states and desires of people around me: I’m primarily out there to have fun. To me, that also means learning about other people and to help them. It’s not as much about self-promotion as my statements in this thread would make some believe.
I’m not faking it, though: this comes naturally to me and as a child I found it quite taxing because I had no idea what was happening to me.

One of the reasons I’m sharing this is my relative anonymity, here and because it’s interesting to share and discuss stuff just a handful of my closest friends know and understand. It’s not so much that I’m applying methods learned from books, but more along the lines of consciously (as much as it’s really possible) controlling my own psychological make-up, most of all stuff like emotional contagion and empathy.

Of course, this necessitates building some inner rapport with yourself and finding ways to verify what you think you’ve found out about yourself. Which might require acquiring some deep knowledge of psychology and neuroscience. Also, being a trained scientist with access to state-of-the-art research, equipment and data gathered from such, such as fMRI, helps in that regard.

Of course, I could just be talking out of my ass, but both you and I know there are simpler ways to have some good old-fashioned e-fun and/or to cater to one’s own delusions of grandeur :wink:

To be clear - and I mean it: I’m not out to convince people here of my views, I just felt I needed to clarify (not defend) my first post in this thread for the sake of information. If someone doesn’t agree, that’s perfectly fine with me and I’d like this thread to just carry on.


Cliffs notes:

learn about and foster your psychological make-up instead of rather blindly applying methods that might not resonate all that much with what makes you tick.

My experience with women who only have gay friends is not very good. I’ve found that these women are very one dimensional and don’t really have much to offer in the personality zone. I think these women are the women that repeatedly get used by straight guys and in order to have friends who are men tend to gravitate to gay guys only.

Personally, I think they may have a lot of hidden issues since they can’t have a healthy relationship with a straight male without opening their legs. None of this is fact, just things I’ve noticed over the years. I’ve spent a lot of time at clubs with higher gay populations and this is just basically the trend I’ve noticed.

[quote]Rattler wrote:
I think they may have a lot of hidden issues since they can’t have a healthy relationship with a straight male without opening their legs. [/quote]

At another time in my life, I’d have considered this a plus and used some of the gays that followed me around at various gyms as a means to get to those girls.

Instead, I just got annoyed at them.

I dated a girl once who had what she called a “platonic relationship” with a gay guy, and it was an exclusive boyfriend-girlfriend deal. They broke up but still remain very close friends.

We had a really intense and short(3 month) relationship. She had some major sexual issues that I could never figure out. I could never even discuss the issue of sex with her in a mature manner…she would just shut down completeley. I remember the 3rd or 4th we had sex she got drunk and scratched the fuck out of me, almost to the point of bleeding.

Anyways, she told me about a lot of her exes and it was clear she had sexual issues with all of them as well.

It got to the point where I just kind of figured she had been molested/abused/raped at some point.

Would not reccommend.