Measuring Bodyfat

Can anybody living on Long Island recommend anybody and any place to have my bodyfat measured? Thanks for your help!

I would use Staten Island garbage dump, ask for Pauly or Fat Tony, they mostly deal with cadavers but for the right price… Tell them that Big P**sy sent you.

HHH, I work at a gym in Glen Cove where we have one of the best model Tanita scales. I don’t know where you’re coming from or if it would be worth the trip for you to have your BF measured in this way, but if you’re in the general area, let me know and we can set something up.

Yeah Trev, just continue assimilating your little army of Glen Cove Gym neophyte/accolytes. See if I care. Pffft, please. HHH, Trevvie will take good care of ya. Lata.

“MBE: The monkey on file with tha freestyle all the while on trial actin’ vile cuz bitch it ain’t his chile’ since 1991.”


“…and his armies did gather there, crawling like demons across a fitness floor, sitting atop treadmills like gargoyles poised to strike. And they did hoist weight of great poundage, and they did grow and did measure bodyfat. And all who saw the knew fear and did tremble at their coming…” hehehe my army is the strongest! Dance, puppets!

“…and verily the amalgamation of boy and monkey did retort towards the idiosyncratic ramblings of His T-ness Trevestious, and the subjects of the Cove Army once thought mighted were hence spited and smited like a muthafucka. Whose eyes were averted in the direct light of Trevestious’ hair, dyed with a mixture consisting of bleach and uranium, far more potent than any reptile upon the head of Medusa herself. And thus, Trevestious took to hooking up with a mentally imbalanced female, she being around at the time.”

“MBE: Far too many inside lines for one post, since 1533.”


My $.02… measuring bodyfat is the biggest waste of time. I laugh when I hear "I am 6.82564875% body fat and have set a goal to lose .0854698% in two weeks so I should reduce my calories by 12 alternating everyday with 24, but I have to eat every 3.75 hours and exactly have a 45/35/20 macronutrient split.

Checkmate, checkmate! You win, oh god that was great man. Nicely done, let’s just let this thing die.