T Nation

Married to a Much Younger Woman?

…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

Has anyone else followed this blueprint, successfully or otherwise?

Kinda weird to think my future wife is now in middle school…

My parents have that exact spread. They are now in their third decade of being married. I don’t think my dad looked at it as ‘I have to find a woman exactly 13 years younger than me’. There was just a click between them.

Not to say that marriage is down the road, but my bf is 11 years older than me. I’m 31 and I’ve found that men my age are too immature. They’re almost all still trying to “re-live” their 20s.

what about women that were top notch at 21ish, snatched up and married, and then lost interest in their husbands so they are newly divorced at 30ish? i would think there could be some potential there.

i think finding a girl that is as mature as they are hot at 21-24 is difficult, i dont want dates based around them telling me whats happening on rock of love bus.

[quote]belligerent wrote:
…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

[/quote]

First, you have to find a 24 y/o woman who doesn’t think a 37 y/o guy is ANCIENT. They’re out there, but very hard to find, I would think.

You have the right to feel how you want, but make sure the balls in your court when you hunt for a woman when your older. Make sure you have a house, your cars, and some decent coin in the bank that will get there in terms of stability. When women get older they tend to focus less on looks and more on stability or long term investment potential. Go for women pass 25, because 25 and younger they have the feelers out (rightfully so) and want to try different things. You can find the hot women, but as my friends and I know “hot girls come with problems” places to look though would be college (Dental School etc.), Church (if your the spiritual type), wine bars, bookstores, basically any place but the bar a respectable human would go to.

If you have money, women will find something sexy about you no matter how old you are.

money + muscles + younger women = u win at LIFE

[quote]Grneyes wrote:

[quote]belligerent wrote:
…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

[/quote]

First, you have to find a 24 y/o woman who doesn’t think a 37 y/o guy is ANCIENT. They’re out there, but very hard to find, I would think.[/quote]

LOL…

wrong

trust me, age is just a number. it always comes down to love, compatibility and respective emotional IQ. some men, and women, irrespective of their biological age, have the emotional IQ of a peanut - and they will experience relationship problems their whole life, whether matched by age, race, income, whatever.

as with any mate, just choose wisely. that probably means disabusing yourself of targetting any single age group - just find who works best for you. love is very hard to find and true love is pretty rare. if you found that with a woman your own age, you need to jump all over it. if you found it with a 24 year old - likewise.

I think trying to follow a blueprint for love is foolish.

DB

[quote]belligerent wrote:
…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

Has anyone else followed this blueprint, successfully or otherwise?

Kinda weird to think my future wife is now in middle school…

[/quote]

I cant put my finger on it, but there is something wrong in this

[quote]jasmincar wrote:

[quote]belligerent wrote:
…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

Has anyone else followed this blueprint, successfully or otherwise?

Kinda weird to think my future wife is now in middle school…

[/quote]

I cant put my finger on it, but there is something wrong in this
[/quote]

Dude, a formula for …loneliness. You cannot plan shit like this, by a certain age, with a girl a certain age…because by the time I’m ready I’ll need a young one…because they are the best and I need to get her before she’s old and over 30.

I can guarantee Murphys law will bite you on this. If you were Indian, and your parents arranged marriage, then maybe this would work out, but in America, you should marry for love and you never know when, where or how it will happen. Who’s to say in 10 years your whole life may change and you will look at the world completely different than 10 years ago.

Good Luck with the “plan”.

[quote]Rockscar wrote:

[quote]jasmincar wrote:

[quote]belligerent wrote:
…as in 10+ years younger?

I don’t want to get married until at least 35, and don’t want to marry a woman the same age becaue: 1) most high-value women are snatched up by 30, and 2) to marry a woman that age is a bad investment in terms of biology. I figure the ideal situation would be to get maried at age 37 to a woman who is then 24 - a 13 year age spread.

Has anyone else followed this blueprint, successfully or otherwise?

Kinda weird to think my future wife is now in middle school…

[/quote]

I cant put my finger on it, but there is something wrong in this
[/quote]

Dude, a formula for …loneliness. You cannot plan shit like this, by a certain age, with a girl a certain age…because by the time I’m ready I’ll need a young one…because they are the best and I need to get her before she’s old and over 30.

I can guarantee Murphys law will bite you on this. If you were Indian, and your parents arranged marriage, then maybe this would work out, but in America, you should marry for love and you never know when, where or how it will happen. Who’s to say in 10 years your whole life may change and you will look at the world completely different than 10 years ago.

Good Luck with the “plan”.

[/quote]

I didn’t know “God” was in this thread. You can’t guarantee anything because you can only share your perspective and “opinion”. There are a lot of people who plan stuff out it doesn’t make them wrong. The beauty of America is that you are “free” to do whatever you want however you choose and for every unsuccessful situation like this there’s an opposing successful situation. based on that we can only share opinion based on how we feel or experiences backed up by others in this thread. However, I respect your opinion.

It basically comes down to this “money + muscles + younger women = u win at LIFE” granted love is a beautiful thing and you will find love, but the type of love available to you is based on you. Money helps, Muscles help for sure. Figure it like opening you up to a larger slice of the pie lol

[quote]prizm wrote:
I didn’t know “God” was in this thread. [/quote]

All I said was that life tends to not happen as planned. I think if he were to say “Marriage at 35” and just that, then he may be on track, but whos to say he’l even have a relationship at that time, and with a -10/15 years woman or girl. Life tends to change as you age, and therefore your plans do too, but to put ages out there is too specific, and it won’t turn out exactly that way.

Also consider this…I have a few friends who are pushing 40 and had the same ideals. They were all divorced after 1-2 years, with kids. Turned out that the women were still too young and felt like they still needed to party and ‘discover" who they were as a person. There was also a huge intellectual gap in generation that led to them not sharing the same ideals and wants in life. The funniest thing is that these guys still date 22 year olds, tell me about their “great new Girl” and how this one is "Mature’…always ends in a breakup for them. Maybe the OP could get lucky.

The deck is stacked against that approach though.

[quote]dollarbill44 wrote:
I think trying to follow a blueprint for love is foolish.

DB[/quote]

I agree w/ DB and the rest of you who, in not so few words, said basically the same thing.

I’d also like to add that over the course of the last 20 years I have become both richer and uglier and have noticed girls are less attracted to me now. I suspect that the common wisdom that women are attracted to the mighty dollar might not be as true as we all thought.

The basic idea Belligerent is presenting does sound nice, though. Locking in a young babe who’s got 20-25 years of babeness ahead of her verses a 35 year old whose looks could turn south at any time, is appealing. A neighbor of mine was a jaw dropping 41 year old a few years ago. Now I’d have to say no thanks. A woman’s looks can turn quick in the 35 to 45 year range. I hope my wife’s looks hold on longer. So far so good.

if any of you think love or muscles has anything to do with love, you’re in for one big fucking disappointment. the only woman that swayed by that is one you don’t want anyway. money usually means power. muscles may imply health or be a basis for attraction. but at the end of the day, love rules whether you are happy or not. i know many many unhappy rich people. i know many lonely physically fit people. find love first.

[quote]prizm wrote:
It basically comes down to this “money + muscles + younger women = u win at LIFE” granted love is a beautiful thing and you will find love, but the type of love available to you is based on you.
[/quote]

If you truly believe this formula, you will likely never find real love. You may delude yourself into thinking it’s love, but it won’t be. If you’re attracted to someone, get to know them. You will like some, you will not like some, some will like you and some will not. If things click, pursue a relationship. If the relationship works and you find yourself consumed in this person, then you have a shot a marriage. If you put artificial restrictions (like 10-13 years younger) on what attracts you, you may be foregoing the best match for you.

For example, I never really found redheads very attractive - until I met my wife. I was always more drawn to brunettes and blondes, but I was so attracted to her right from the start that I couldn’t stop thinking about her. After spending a lot of time with her, I found her to be a really cool girl and I didn’t like being apart from her for very long. After a while, we got married. We first met 22 years ago and we’ve been married 17+ years.

Your formula does not = winning at life. There is so much more to it than that. If you are lucky enough to grow old, money and muscles will come and go and women always age. With each successive trade-in for a younger woman, the gap between man and woman increases and eventually she will be nothing more than an expensive escort for you and you will be little more than a trust fund for her.

DB

[quote]Grneyes wrote:
Not to say that marriage is down the road, but my bf is 11 years older than me. I’m 31 and I’ve found that men my age are too immature. They’re almost all still trying to “re-live” their 20s.[/quote]

Wow, I guess I have you fooled, huh?

OP, you can plan all you want when it comes to marriage, kids, and the age you think you’ll be doing all these things… But, life can and will, make sure that it won’t stick to any “plan”.

Otherwise, good luck.

[quote]dollarbill44 wrote:
If you are lucky enough to grow old, money and muscles will come and go and women always age. With each successive trade-in for a younger woman, the gap between man and woman increases and eventually she will be nothing more than an expensive escort for you and you will be little more than a trust fund for her.

DB[/quote]

I currently work in security at a more or less exclusive location and I see that combination of rich and old coupled with young and hunting for money all the time.

I can´t say whether they are happy or not though. Probably they are just semi miserable.

10 years younger bitches, but neelydan didnt plan it that way…don’t have the looks or personality, as evidenced by photo, to plan anything

landed her the same way i knocked out the quarterback of the guelph university football team…close your eyes and swing for the fences, sometimes you get lucky