Major Roommate Problem

My roommate was one of my best friends in high school, when we graduated I went to college, he went to the marines. Now were both 25 years old and he moved in with me. Im a work out junkie and got him into it. he lost 30 lbs and things were going well (He was chubby).

THE PROBLEM

After a few months of unemployment he fell into depression and started dating a girl that is horrifically ugly and fat. She is a 2 out of 10 (Massive fat ginger, Acne, doesn’t brush her teeth, so tops of teeth are full of plaque and yellow)

He knows that I’m not accepting of her because she is a horrible influence on him. She eats donuts and cake for dinner and he has put on 35 lbs in 2 months of dating her and doesn’t care because “She Doesn’t”. Now that he knows I don’t like her, he has nasty FAT SEX when im in the apartment and she yells “Fuck me” super loud when they have sex. We still have six months on our lease and he owns all the furniture in the apartment so if I kick him out he takes everything and I cant leave because I cant break the lease. What do I do? How do I get this to stop?! How can I bring this up in a nice way…

Do you know how disgusting it is to be grilling chicken and ten feet away behind a closed door there are 2 fat people having loud sex and I hear there stomachs hitting each other…

405lb Bench Press
495lb Deadlift
250 lbs at 12% bodyfat

Jizz in his shampoo

My friend! We’ve got a couple problems here.

  1. Your friend has been ensorcelled by a foul succubus.
  2. Your deadlift needs some work.

As for one, if he is or at least once was a true friend, you must broach the subject candidly and aggressively. Remind him he’s a goddamn US Marine. Tell him to get strong, get lean, and get rid of this life sapping hamplanet. He has but one life, and she is seeing prescious time doomed to ruin.

For the second one, post a form vid and give us an idea of what your back training looks like.

[quote]SuperHuman25 wrote:

405lb Bench Press
495lb Deadlift
250 lbs at 12% bodyfat

[/quote]

You don’t have to like her but you should still be respectful of her and your friend’s decision to be with her.
If you don’t like his lifestyle, be an example to him. Don’t bitch to him.
You should ask that he keeps the noise down
You can absolutely break a lease, there is some things you need to do around it though
He can move out, and you can buy furniture
LOL@posting your lifts, I know it’s tnation but still.

First off, decide if he’s still a best friend. (ie. times change and ppl change, and so on)

If he is - tell him that you refuse to let him settle into complacency. That you’re happy to help him change for the better, but that he needs to respect both himself and your time and effort. And that he’ll thank you for this later.

If he isn’t (or you just cannot get through to him) - just move out.

[quote]chobbs wrote:
Jizz in his shampoo[/quote]

Um, no.

You put hair dye in his shampoo.

The jizz goes into a syringe, which allows you to put it in his toothpaste.

If he was willing to drop the progress he made and go full retard with donuts and fat chicks that quickly and easily, you stand no chance.

Tie them up in what appears to be an elaborate S&M rig and burn the place to the ground.

Just bang her one day when you know he’s gonna walk in. Then maybe he’ll wake up and see how far he’s gone.

Well I, uh, I’m not sure how to pronounce it pronounce it or anything but I believe it’s menage a trois?

[quote]xboxwarrior wrote:
Well I, uh, I’m not sure how to pronounce it pronounce it or anything but I believe it’s menage a trois?[/quote]
You usually pay double for that kind of action.

[quote]bdocksaints75 wrote:

[quote]xboxwarrior wrote:
Well I, uh, I’m not sure how to pronounce it pronounce it or anything but I believe it’s menage a trois?[/quote]
You usually pay double for that kind of action.[/quote]

^^^

knows what he is talking about

[quote]xboxwarrior wrote:
Well I, uh, I’m not sure how to pronounce it pronounce it or anything but I believe it’s menage a trois?[/quote]

What the fuck do you need furniture for?

Seriously, you’re 25 years old, you don’t need furniture and nobody needs friends who are rude and disrespectful to you in your own home. Tell him you don’t like the way things are going and to save your friendship he is going to have to move out. And stop worrying about fucking furniture.

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:

…And stop worrying about fucking furniture.

[/quote]

Why would anyone want to fuck furniture?[/quote]

If you need to ask… you haven’t lived.

[quote]pushharder wrote:

[quote]on edge wrote:

…And stop worrying about fucking furniture.

[/quote]

Why would anyone want to fuck furniture?[/quote]

Ask Superhuman25. He’s suspiciously attached to that furniture.

The only furniture you need is a chair, a desk, and a bed.

You can get all of those for under 50 (I think) USD on craigslist.

Take a real look at whether he’s still your best friend or not.

If he is, then have a real heart to heart with him and deal with the consequences.

If he’s not, then kick him out and buy your furniture for under 20 USD. I’m sure your bed isn’t his.

Seriously, fuck furniture. Incredibly annoying to move into and out of the house.

How else are you supposed to interpret “love seat”?

Answers to a few questions posed

  1. He is no longer my best friend and Im contemplating if he is even a friend at all.
  2. I could never fuck her, she looks like a the Exorcist but fatter and with red hair. I would post a facial pic but I think it would be censored.
  3. He fights really dirty. This is the worst part of his personality. He knows things about me that others don’t and he doesn’t give a fuck about privacy and will bring everything to light if he thinks it will help him.

I think next time he is sitting on the couch Im going to approach him face to face and just tell him straight up that his gf is a horrible influence on him. Give examples (Weight Gain, Unemployed, does nothing all day but text her) Then tell him that when the lease is up either he must move out or Im going to move out. and offer him the opportunity to move out now and I just fully take on the lease.

Just so you guys don’t think im a vain fuck. This girl isn’t an example of an ugly girl that has a great personality. She is a huge piece of shit that’s anti-social and awkward around everyone. When I let her in the door she doesn’t even say hi, she puts her head down and walks quickly to his room.

Im also getting a lock on my door. I almost fucking lost it the other day. He asked where the wifi code was then said, “I walked in your room and looked all through your drawers and dresser and couldn’t find it anywhere, Gingersaurus needs it because she doesn’t want to use her data while she’s here”

So he invaded my privacy because his fat fuckng loser gf JUST HAD to have wifi for her phone…