T Nation

Lying Through Your Teeth

Anyone ever out and out lie to get a job??
Just wondering as I’m sitting here in a transition period and the one job prospect that I currently have involves just that…they need someone that’s familiar with SQL…annnnnnnnnnnnd I haven’t a clue
I’m just wondering how hard it is to catch onto.

You can pad experience, you can’t lie about knowledge. A simple test would expose you. What if they gave you a question like: ‘How would you select all the elements from A not in B?’ Easy if you know SQL.

select * from A

sorry just had to.

I am always completely honest. When interviewing for a job at Kohl’s Department Store, I was asked, “Is the customer always right?” Behind the interviewer’s head was a poster proudly proclaiming ‘The customer is always right!’

My answer: “No.”

I got the job.

[quote]cryptik wrote:
select * from A

sorry just had to.[/quote]

Fail. “A” and “B” could contain exactly the same data.

Next candidate! :wink:

I told the hiring manager at the bank I work for that I knew Macintosh as well as I knew any other platform out there.

I had never even turned one on.

8 years later, I remain in technology for the very same bank.

As an aside - you could NOT do that with SQL, not a snowball’s chance in hell of pulling that off.

I never lie in interviews, just exaggerate a shit load.

The interviewer knows you’re padding what you do and selling yourself. It’s just playing the game.

But if caught in a lie, guaranteed you don’t get the position.

[quote]NeelyDan wrote:
As an aside - you could NOT do that with SQL, not a snowball’s chance in hell of pulling that off.[/quote]

Do what? SELECT set from A not in B? or fake it unless you knew it?

[quote]dennis3k wrote:
Anyone ever out and out lie to get a job??
Just wondering as I’m sitting here in a transition period and the one job prospect that I currently have involves just that…they need someone that’s familiar with SQL…annnnnnnnnnnnd I haven’t a clue
I’m just wondering how hard it is to catch onto.[/quote]

Are you otherwise a programmer? What type of job is it?

If it was something simple, yes you could lie about it.

Something like programming…not a chance in hell.

It’s pretty hard to BS through a technical interview, unless the interviewing manager is an idiot.

[quote]dday wrote:
It’s pretty hard to BS through a technical interview, unless the interviewing manager is an idiot. [/quote]

This is true. I was offered a job once (declined) where in the technical interview (there were 4 total interviews), on several occasions I corrected the interviewer, presumably who would have been my manager. I didn’t get “warm/fuzzies” about the company competency.

[quote]SteelyD wrote:
dday wrote:
It’s pretty hard to BS through a technical interview, unless the interviewing manager is an idiot.

This is true. I was offered a job once (declined) where in the technical interview (there were 4 total interviews), on several occasions I corrected the interviewer, presumably who would have been my manager. I didn’t get “warm/fuzzies” about the company competency.[/quote]

Yea that’s never a good sign. IMO a manager should have at least a base knowledge of the position he’s interviewing for. Nothing worse than a manager who thinks he knows everything and in reality doesn’t know shit.

A little “padding” is typically OK. An out right lie will more than likely catch up with you. Now ask yourself: DO you know SQL?

No, no and no!

This line of thinking is what makes the world a shitty place. Shame on you for even contemplating that.

I would classify myself as a Statistician for the most part, as most of my positions seem to revolve around statistical analysis, I’ve just never actually been in a position where I’ve used SQL though, I’ve got some programming experience…just not in that particular one

Agree with above-- don’t lie.

If you’re a statistician, then you can pick up basic SQL fairly simple. Google it-- there’s tons and tons of examples.

Familiarize yourself with it. In the interview you should tell them that you’re not selling yourself as an SQL (yes, I say “Ess” “Q” “EL”) wizard but your familiar with what it is and how its used and that you’ve been learning it (assuming that you go and start learning it).

It would be the truth, would illustrate self-sufficiency and motivation, and would show that you’re willing to man up to a deficiency and take steps to remedy.

[quote]SteelyD wrote:
NeelyDan wrote:
As an aside - you could NOT do that with SQL, not a snowball’s chance in hell of pulling that off.

Do what? SELECT set from A not in B? or fake it unless you knew it?[/quote]

SQL (development in general) is not something you can fake, is what I meant.

You can get by with a claim of OS knowledge or something, but a language/db platform is too intimate to wing anything.

Well, not even from the ‘what if I get caught’ side of things, but the whole “this is going to be my livelihood!”.

Think about that - if you lie and say you have experience with something that you do NOT - and it is something KEY to your potential position - you’re going to deal that thing regularly (not the MAC case as listed above).

What would you plan to do? Study up on it? Learn it on the job?

Now, there is a WIDE space between “enhancing” your story and lying.

For example, the first job I had out of college, I was working for a company that grew crystals for laser systems (cool stuff). Well, I had to figure out (aka, be a lab rat) why a bunch weren’t doing what they were supposed to. I tested like 40 of them by hand in a system and figured out which ones were cut at the complementary angle than they were supposed (technician flipped his protractor!). Well, when we figured that out, the ‘yield’ was improved by about 33% over where it had been (and figuring out not to cut from certain areas…blah blah blah.

How did I say that in an interview?

“Utilizing laboratory test equipment and standardized systems, developed a quality control/quality assurance initiative to improve yield by 30% in 3 months time.”

That’s glossy -that’s fluffed up - but it’s not a lie. :slight_smile: