[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
[quote]Uncle Gabby wrote:
[quote]Steel Nation wrote:
[quote]honest_lifter wrote:
[quote]MartyMonster wrote:
[quote]honest_lifter wrote:
I don’t want my wife to have to work much (if at all) and to do that I need to live simpler. [/quote]
Why in Gods name, Why?
If my wife ever thought of not going out and earning a decent wage I’d go nuclear. If she earned way more than me, I’d be totally stoked, no problems. And if I told her I’d prefer her not to work and earn a wage…she’d geld me.
[/quote]
Good question.
I know that I can handle stress much more efficiently than most and if I can take more of a burden on me (specifically at the beginning) I know it will make her transition easier. She is uprooting her life to move in with me; meaning she will be away from her family and friends. That stress alone is enough, and I don’t want to burden her with more, until/unless she feels she can handle it.
Plus, we both do volunteer work in excess of 70 hours a month so I want her to focus her efforts on that to prevent her from getting burned out, which would only cause harm to our first year(s) of marriage; those being especially difficult (transition and such).[/quote]
This doesn’t make any sense to me. A SAHM still doesn’t have enough to keep herself busy unless there are multiple children at home full-time, so I don’t know what a childless woman is going to do with herself all day. ESPECIALLY one with no family or friends in the area.
People tend to flounder and look for something to fill the void when they don’t have a damn good reason to get up in the morning. Bored, lonely wives tend to fill that void in a very specific way. Not saying that this is what will happen, but this is how a lot of those stories start.[/quote]
I wouldn’t say that she will fuck around, but having a job, and therefore structure in one’s life is a great way to ward off depression, which she sounds like a candidate for, being separated from family and all. I’d say she’ll be more likely to get fat.[/quote]
Yeah I’m not saying she will either. I agree with you about the depression though, and depressed people try to find ways to comfort themselves. There are a lot of ways she could do that, but cheating is the first one that I think of when I think “depressed, lonely housewife.”
OP, I think the stress a job would cause her is better than the stress of NOT having a job. Otherwise, all of the tips given are solid and I can’t add anything else constructive.[/quote]
Those are good points. I may have not been clear earlier, but we both spend 70+ hours a month doing volunteer work. This would be in addition to caring for a household, which she has never done before. So she is going to have plenty of things to keep her busy, I just don’t want her to be TOO busy, especially if she is overwhelmed with the whole move and transition to a new life. If she wants to work, I am willing to let her obviously, because that means we won’t have to be as tight with money. BUT if she is overwhelmed and doesn’t want one, I don’t have to put us in a position to MAKE her (financially), if that makes sense.
I have never had cable before, I can’t see the value in it. In fact, in my first apartment, I didn’t even have internet. I am looking into phone plans that don’t contain data, as I never even thought about that as a “luxury” but it is a perfect place to trim off some serious expense. I guess that is how people view TV now too.