I’ve been accused of being anorexic, obsessive compulsive, and bulimic. I’m sorry, non of the above are true–I love food too much. But because I choose to pass on the lunch meeting at the Mexican buffet for a grilled chicken salad, I’m subject to ridicule and harassment. I do this because I WANT TO! I CHOOSE to go to the gym, spend our money on supplements, and pay attention to what and how much I eat. Just as much as they CHOOSE to be lazy fat asses. I DO NOT do this because I have an eating disorder or think that I’m fat (5’6" at 130 lbs). As far as the jealousy part–I love the fact that Lee works out. He supports my efforts, is a good role model for our son, and at the same time keeps himself healthy and strong. Plus, I have to say that I don’t mind seeing him flex in the mirror–it’s definatly a turn on!!!
[quote]maryjane wrote:
I’ve been accused of being anorexic, obsessive compulsive, and bulimic. I’m sorry, non of the above are true–I love food too much. But because I choose to pass on the lunch meeting at the Mexican buffet for a grilled chicken salad, I’m subject to ridicule and harassment. I do this because I WANT TO! I CHOOSE to go to the gym, spend our money on supplements, and pay attention to what and how much I eat. Just as much as they CHOOSE to be lazy fat asses. I DO NOT do this because I have an eating disorder or think that I’m fat (5’6" at 130 lbs). As far as the jealousy part–I love the fact that Lee works out. He supports my efforts, is a good role model for our son, and at the same time keeps himself healthy and strong. Plus, I have to say that I don’t mind seeing him flex in the mirror–it’s definatly a turn on!!! [/quote]
Are you buttering me up?
No, just being very honest!
One thing that has always bothered me is when I see a guy ‘running’ his wife. A very similar situation is when I see an experienced lifter bringing the ‘skinny’ guy to the gym and putting him on some ridiculous lifting plan.
I say this because jealousy, and complacency typically evolve out of improper techniques/motivation. Too many people never lift because they cannot deadlift what their ‘mentor’ can. Likewise, many wives/girlfriends give up on work out plans because their sig other is a maniacal tyrant. Jealousy is the inability of achieving personnal goals. That is why I love the Pavel/Waterbury saying “Train to success”. Moreover, people shouldn’t train to unrealistic goals, and they should understand the different techniques needed to achieve their goals.
I had this discussion with a buddy recently. When I have been out of the gym for awhile it is very hard to get motivated to go back. But once I set goals, and then began working towards them it becomes an obsession. I guess the end of this rant is “Train to success”
[quote]BIGRAGOO wrote:
She feels better, looks beter, and likes what she sees in the mirror more.
Any thoughts?[/quote]
My wife doesn’t help much in the food area. It’s tough to eat MRP’s while your wife is eating a heaping bowl of ice cream!
I think you should post pics of the mrs so we can tell her how great she looks and boost her confidence even more. 
[quote]heron wrote:
BIGRAGOO wrote:
She feels better, looks beter, and likes what she sees in the mirror more.
Any thoughts?
My wife doesn’t help much in the food area. It’s tough to eat MRP’s while your wife is eating a heaping bowl of ice cream!
I think you should post pics of the mrs so we can tell her how great she looks and boost her confidence even more.
[/quote]
Those will be coming in the near future. Stay tuned.
[quote]analog_kid wrote:
It’s not just your SO, family gets jealous as well. [/quote]
I have just recently experienced this and realized that people seen to be threatened by anything that isn’t ‘average’ or considered ‘normal’ in their environment. Anything outside of these boundaries is considered ‘extreme’. A friend of mine who works out recently said that she will go out to dinner with her husband and some friends and they will talk about the drugs they did in college and laugh about it. This is ‘normal’ to them. Then when she orders dinner, they give her shit about what she eats. She is too ‘extreme’.
I was trying to point out some things to both of my parents, and my brother found it necessary to rip into me for being too ‘extreme’ and saying ‘maybe every body doesn’t want to look like you do’. This coming from I guy I love, but who is at least 50 pounds overweight at 38 years old. I really hope he makes it to his kids’ graduations.
My parents are both over 60, former smokers (thank god), overweight, and both had parents that died from heart complications. Funny thing is they both workout. Everyone in my family except the one brother works out. My father still plays basketball weekly, against 30 something?s, and he owns them. But watching what you eat is just not ‘normal’ in most Italian families. Everything revolves around food. Every event, every gathering, every celebration. So when I make comments about the food they eat, and the sheer amount of dessert our family consumes, I am considered the ‘extremist’.
To me it boils down to comfort level. Americans especially seem to be obsessed with being average, or normal. Don’t do too much or too little. In my opinion, if you are going to believe in something, do it or don’t. I am just glad I can come to this site and feel, well, normal.
[quote]chrisp23 wrote:
analog_kid wrote:
It’s not just your SO, family gets jealous as well.
I have just recently experienced this and realized that people seen to be threatened by anything that isn’t ‘average’ or considered ‘normal’ in their environment. Anything outside of these boundaries is considered ‘extreme’. A friend of mine who works out recently said that she will go out to dinner with her husband and some friends and they will talk about the drugs they did in college and laugh about it. This is ‘normal’ to them. Then when she orders dinner, they give her shit about what she eats. She is too ‘extreme’.
I was trying to point out some things to both of my parents, and my brother found it necessary to rip into me for being too ‘extreme’ and saying ‘maybe every body doesn’t want to look like you do’. This coming from I guy I love, but who is at least 50 pounds overweight at 38 years old. I really hope he makes it to his kids’ graduations.
My parents are both over 60, former smokers (thank god), overweight, and both had parents that died from heart complications. Funny thing is they both workout. Everyone in my family except the one brother works out. My father still plays basketball weekly, against 30 something?s, and he owns them. But watching what you eat is just not ‘normal’ in most Italian families. Everything revolves around food. Every event, every gathering, every celebration. So when I make comments about the food they eat, and the sheer amount of dessert our family consumes, I am considered the ‘extremist’.
To me it boils down to comfort level. Americans especially seem to be obsessed with being average, or normal. Don’t do too much or too little. In my opinion, if you are going to believe in something, do it or don’t. I am just glad I can come to this site and feel, well, normal.
[/quote]
Let me start by thanking Bigragoo for this thread. What a great topic. Probably one that every reader on this site has experienced in one way or another. You and MaryJane are lucky to have one another.
I can totally relate to the post quoted above. Proper nutrition is so misunderstood in this country. I could be a meth addict and probably garner less concern from my family.
My own mother has said, “Honey are you eating enough, you look awfully small” followed by “Have you seen the amount of food I consume in one day?” Leanness vs. Skinny Fat is so misunderstood. Since when did lean meats, fruits, vegetables and whole grains become extreme?
Thanks to Biotest and all the T-Nation readers for coming together on this site. It gives all of us fitness ‘freaks’ a place to feel ‘normal’!!
My question is…have any of you ever had a relationship end b/c your SO wouldn’t get on board with the being healthy program?
C
[quote]Creidem wrote:
My question is…have any of you ever had a relationship end b/c your SO wouldn’t get on board with the being healthy program?
C[/quote]
I have found relationships to be harder if the person you are with does not ‘understand’ what you are doing. MaryJane said it best when she admitted to trying to stop Bigragoo from going to the gym or taking supplements. Life is better with someone who is on the same page. Mutual support, understanding, similar diets, shared experiences…it all makes it better.
[quote]maryjane wrote:
I have to say that I don’t mind seeing him flex in the mirror–it’s definatly a turn on!!! [/quote]
[quote]BIGRAGOO wrote:
Are you buttering me up?[/quote]
[quote]maryjane wrote:
No, just being very honest![/quote]
Get a room. <:-)
|/ 3Toes
[quote]chrisp23 wrote:
Creidem wrote:
My question is…have any of you ever had a relationship end b/c your SO wouldn’t get on board with the being healthy program?
C
I have found relationships to be harder if the person you are with does not ‘understand’ what you are doing. MaryJane said it best when she admitted to trying to stop Bigragoo from going to the gym or taking supplements. Life is better with someone who is on the same page. Mutual support, understanding, similar diets, shared experiences…it all makes it better.[/quote]
She knew she could persuade into being lax about training when I told her “I lifted before you, I’ll lift after you.” After that she began to see how involved I was with it. It wasn’t a harsh statement , but it conveyed my message.