Let's Hear Them Stories: I Broke My Mrs Blasting

Hahahaha, yea i get what you’re saying. And it all comes down to the dynamic of the relationship. There is no domestic violence or abuse in my house. Lets just be clear on that one. Fuck me.

I have been banned by her doctor for a week. So that sucks.

Meh too many PC people these days.

I love your dinner comment thays epic. As i decend from survivors of the holocaust and lost most of my blood lone from it. People need to fucking relax.

Back in 1940, there was a little girl standing in field crying, a soldier walks up to her and asks why she’s crying. The little girl responds, it’s my birthday tomorrow. The soldier says no its not.

In 1940, in a concentration camp soldiers started ushering people into building, people are cheering thay are finally getting a roof over their heads.

As the people are walking into the building they notice what appears to be showee heads on the roof. Everyone breaks out in to tears of joy, their getting showers to get sent home they are saying.

As the soldiers start closing the doors behind them a little kid says, but daddy their are no drains.

Oh shit did i just say those. Fucking oath i did, sure it was a disgrace what happened in germany and my family knows all to well of the impact on lives. But there is a point in life you just need to get over shit.

It depends, you see the holocaust is something that should forever be remembered in history, as the extent of suffering endured by the people who were put through the camps, the amount of deaths in general from war, fightning, inhumane conditions etc were astounding. Whether it’s appropriate to make jokes about it depends on the individual you’re talking to. Typically holocaust humour is used as a form of shock humour. Some people find it funny, some people don’t, I personally think it depends on the joke, for instance, I don’t see any humour in these

I’ll explain, the jews, homosexuals, jehova’s witnesses etc and whoever else were being round up to be persecuted/ worked to death were already starved in the ghettos and subjected to inhumane conditions, they had a roof over their head’s, making a joke about people being happy to go into concentration camps is (in my opinions) showing profound disrespect to those who suffered in concentration camps. The shower one isn’t funny either, as that’s exactly what happened, people were given the pretense of “showers”, but were systematically gassed, whether people knew about the gassing before the shower was debatable, depends on which camp they were at, in treblinka, it was very obvious what was going on. The no drains one isn’t funny either (this is my opinion mind you) and it isn’t because I’m PC, it’s because I find them to be extremely disrespectful, in bad taste and to top them off there’s no punchline that makes them funny, occasionally a joke is extremely funny, even though it’s in bad taste, these in my opinion are not examples of them.

But this one

I can see a bit of humour in as the soldier is denying her the simple right of having a birthday, the right to be recongized as a human being, and that’s darkly humourous in a very nihilistic way. Many won’t find even this one funny, as making jokes about the holocaust is an extremely controversial (and in my opinon immature) thing to do (no offence). It’s not to say I don’t make similar jokes, for instance I was talking to this one kid who was like far right and was telling me “9/11 was an inside job, the government did it” so I said “no ways mate, the jews did it, did you know the earth is flat”, now I’m Jewish, this person knew I was jewish, therefore whether it’s an acceptable joke to make or not is debatable, many will find it to be in extreme bad taste, and while it is, I’m not disrespecting anyone who died in 9/11, you’re holocaust jokes listed above (besides the one about the little girl) disrespects those who died. While you can say “well then why can we make jokes about the spanish inquisition, or all that historical stuff” my response would be “you shouldn’t, it was still a systematic persecution of people that resulted in a lot of suffering, that being said the spanish inquisition occured in the 1400’s, the holocaust was less than 100 years ago”, to add to the time span difference in the 1400’s society was far more primitive, while there’s still no excuse for what occured, however it can easily be seen as “society wasn’t exactly civil back then, people lived their lives based on religious beliefs” the 1940’s was modern society with ethics and morals (albeit we have progressed since then with regards to views on race, gender equality etc), the fact the holocaust occured in modern society is totally unnacceptable, and to make things worse, genocides are occuring this very minute as I type this message. http://www.genocidewatch.com/copy-of-current-genocide-watch-aler

So is you’re girl okay with this behavior or not? Does she enjoy the sex? If you’re okay with it but she isn’t then that’s an unnacceptable dynamic. If you want to continue having frequent sexual intercourse and you’re significant other is okay with it could you not just go slower/ be less agressive, focus more on foreplay and whatnot, sure it’ll take longer to finish but you still get to have sex

Out of curiousity, what religion are you? Are you Jewish like me, jehovas witness? Roman Catholic?

Oh yea she complains when she doesnt get enough. She is searching for a unicore to join us in the bedroom atm. Though i have told herz she needs the relationship with this new woman first. She was a lesbian for 3 years before me. So that works.

My bloodline goes way back to the 1800s which is documented. We have napolean bonaparte on out family tree. Palace “my last name” was a palace within our family. Which is now a public site in Venice.

I decend from my grandfather only he and my great uncle survived the gas chambers.

So im not technically Jewish.

But im an aussie but, no religion. Religion is only a means to control the masses and a reason to start a war for.

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I wouldn’t approach trestolone even if it was side effect free lol, not enough data on the compound to verify it’s safety besides short term studies relating to male contraception.

I was reluctant to respond at first, but not anymore.

So, what kind of stories do you want to hear? Do they need to involve steroids? Do staph infections count if there’s a backstory of rough sex that threw the emergency room doctors for a loop? What about tales of seduction involving women with lacy bras waving cleavage in front of you while pretending to pet a dog? Does getting your personal space seriously violated by a mother of four whilst on duty as a bouncer float your boat?

If so, I have tales to tell, my friend. Sadly, none involve steroids or land wars in Asia.

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I have no idea what you’re response meant but if you’re serious I actually am intrigued by this one. Do tell young whippersnapper, do tell.

Well, the thread title asked for stories, but I don’t want to get off-topic with tales that do not involve steroid-fueled sexual mishaps or land wars in Asia. Not without the OP’s permission, of course. That’s kind of rude.

And thanks for calling me young. I’m glad you think I’m young. I feel young when I’m not hurting or injured or explaining odd circumstances to emergency room doctors. Age is just a number!

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Go for it man.

Was meant to be an area of stories, good or bad. Funny or not

man I love this thread, some people take things way too seriously. suppose everyone has a different senss of humour though. I mean no offence.

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no part says she’s very unhappy about the situation, you are assuming she doesn’t like being roughed up. she has to see a doctor yes but it could be the price she’s willing to pay.

Oh no she love it.

Doc said a week, so he mouth will just get more usage

You’re going to let the doctor suck you off? R U sure ur gf is okay with that?

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Oh yea, she is she is trying to find another woman for out home life thats all cool. Hahaha

Oh hey @unreal24278, so good news. I went to the pharmacy yesterday and again 191/102 BP.

Went to the dr this morning again. But it was 138/86. Anyway i now have on hand some diuretics and an ACE inhibitor to help balance me out.

Then i had to go back to the pharmacy and school the on their blood pressure machine and do some experiments to prove either their machine was broken or the cuff.

But it just turns out they needed to be using an extra large cuff to give the correct results

Thank fuck for that.

It reminds me of and old schoolfriend that went into the navy, and came out a bit of an animal. He had this girlfriend who had to go to the dr because she was bleeding from the rectum. It turns out he was banging her 3x a day up the date. Apparently she liked it but her butthole was really getting punished. I think he might have used steroids before, but not necessarily at the time if this qualifies it as a pharma story.

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Honestly, this just sounds messed up dude. And I’m someone who really enjoys sex with my girl. Like even if you guys have an active, intense sex life, really sounds like you’re viewing her as a sex object.

This kinda sounds like you’re just trying to appear like you’re pretty hardcore and tough, by making a joke about millions of innocent people dying. I’m Native and I make a lot of innapropriate jokes but I’m not like “fuck the Trail of Tears bro it’s funny as fuck that 4,000 people froze and starved to death.” Not cause it’s not PC, but because it’s honestly just not funny at all. It’s people. Humans. Dying.

But fucking right you said that. Way to go.

Did he learn this in the military

.
(just kidding, no disrespect for those who serve in the military, on the contrary I hold nothing but respect for people in the military)

Got lots of mates in the navy, the chicks innthe navy are the biggest gangas there is no need to for the men to get each other off

Not really, im probably one of the most quiet guys in my group. I despise they guys who carry on like they’re king shit.

Humans die mate, fact of life. If you can’t make lite of bad situations then all you’re going to do is be a depressed fuck all your life.

Sure you remember and respect for all the bad that happened. Lots of bad shit happens on a daily basis.

If you cant make light of bad situations life is always going to feel bad.

For instance, i barely watch the news its all about bad things. When your not constantly hearing about the bad you feel much better about the present.

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I was joking, but the male to women ratio in active duty is like less than 6:1, and I can see why, it’s a very physically demanding job, while some women are suited to it, men tend to be physically stronger and more endurant than our female counterparts (and no this doesn’t make me sexist, I’ve been called sexist for saying the average untrained man vs the untrained female 99 percent of the time the guy will bench press more, it’s our biology, we tend to carry a higher level of muscle mass, have a higher level of athleticism and whatnot), therefore it’s probably harder for a woman to get into active duty. Secondly, the percentage of females who report having been either sexually assaulted or harassed in the military is very high, therefore this may be a further deterrent for girls who want to enlist but then see these stats and they’re like “no thanx”. Although less common, male rape does seem to occur in the military, I know someone who served overseas who came back early due to the strain it had on his mental state, I asked him and he said “it happens, we just don’t talk about it” (talking about man on man rape), I doubt it’s common but I’m willing to bet in areas where men haven’t gotten action for months/ years on end it happens.

Wow this place can be so serious sometimes