T Nation

James Traficant - Funny Quotes

Not sure if anyone here is a reader of SomethingAwful, but today the article featured expelled Congressman Traficant and some of his quotes. The guy’s a laugh riot.

“I will take with me a file, a chisel, a knife, I will try and get some major explosives, try to fight my way out,” Traficant said of the possibility of his incarceration.

“And then when I get out I will grab a sword like Maximus Meridius Demidius and as a Gladiator I will stab people in the crotch.”

“If you don’t get those cameras out of my face, I’m gonna go 8.6 on the Richter scale with gastric emissions that’ll clear this room!”

" Mr. Speaker, as a former athlete, I thought I saw it all. Great celebrations after grand slams and Hail Marys. But this time it has gone too far.

News reports say after a game-winning goal at a soccer match in Spain, a player celebrated his teammate who scored by biting him on the genitals.

Beam me up.

Now I have heard of high fives, back slaps, butt slaps, but this takes the family jewels.

The team says the player is doing fine, but I suspect he will speak from here on in like a soprano. This is going a little too far. I yield back what has now become known as ``The Big Bite.'' "

" Unbelievable. These fat cats should not be rewarded, they should be fired. Throw these bums out. Beam me up. I yield back the fact that they should hire a proctologist to perform a brain scan on that Federal judge who is somewhere in Disney World."

That guys epitomizes all that is wrong with politics and politicians. He makes me sick.

I have to admit…i currently live in the city this man called home, Youngstown, OH. As they say, “Youngstown, OH…you have to live somewhere.”

I grew up in his congressional district.

He’s my favorite Democrat! :slight_smile:

Take a look at this…


Maximus Meridius Demidius?! ROFLMAO!

This guy makes me as sick as Dick Cheney does. By the way, is that a yeti skull cap he’s wearing?


“I want you to disregard all the opposing counsel has said. I think they’re delusionary. I think they’ve had something funny for lunch in their meal, I think they should be handcuffed, chained to a fence and flogged, and all of their hearsay evidence should be thrown the hell out. And if they lie again, I’m going to go over there and kick them in the crotch. Thank you very much.” ? Traficant’s closing statement to the ethics panel.

The guy cracks me up, Back when Rush had his TV show, he used to play video clips of Traficant on the floor of the House. He was hated by his own party, as evidenced by the silence from the left at his lynching.


Funny as hell.

I remember drawing this back when that whole thing went down.


I can see why. His image is about as interesting as his public speaking.