T Nation

ITT: We Share a Secret.


#1

When I really can't sleep at night, I shave my balls.

Now, you go.


#2

I’ve masturbated to pictures of several of the female posters on this site


#3

Before I jerk off, I coat my hand with tacky. Can we turn this into an I’m tougher than you thread?


#4

When I was a kid I cut a hole in my teddy bear and replaced its fluffy insides with bacon. Then I …


#5

I got caught kissing another man’s wife… by her husband.


#6

I was in the Philippines right before Subic Bay was shutdown. We would need a v2.0 of this thread to hold what I could share from that.


#7

I shot the sheriff.


#8

[quote]byukid wrote:
I shot the sheriff.[/quote]

I did not shoot the deputy. But we all knew that already.


#9

[quote]JaseHxC wrote:
I’ve masturbated to pictures of several of the female posters on this site[/quote]

WHAT THE FUCK?

Females?


#10

I think comic book superheroines are sexy as hell. They give me boners.


#11

dropped a 45 pound plate on three toes today from chest height…did i wins

edit: I get my post from tk42 for your reading pleasure.


#12

Bass: Why hello Mr. Plate, how are you this glorious morning?
Mr. Plate: I’m great!!! How is your foot?
Bass: Fine, fine… I’m wearing my Nike Frees today…what what!!! 0_o
Mr. Plate: Whooooopsie1?!?!?!! BOOYAH FUCK YOUR LEFT FOOT BASS!!! FUCK YOUR TOES AND YO SHIN!!!
Bass: That’s not nice Mr. Plate, my left shoe is filling up with blood and staining the grey fabric designed to offer less than absolutely zero protection.
Mr. Plate: Yup I’m Metal, not like those pussy plastic covered hex plates. I’m ole school, rusty, and probably covered in disease.
Bass: hangs head, finishes coffee, limps to car at the very last spot in the lot, punches steering wheel, notices blood oozing from shin, thinks I didn’t even feel that part, punches wheel again, drives home.

Wife: wha happened?

Bass: Please get Bass ice pack,
Bass: Takes off shoe, grabs pinky pulls straight, no pain, grabs next toe does the same, CRACK, reset toe, tapes toe, grabs toes next to that pulls crack tapes. Takes 2 Tylenol, wishes Bass had advil, ices foot.

Wife: doctor:

Bass: why to wait for them to do the exact same thing, but make bass wait 2 hours for x-ray first, then 2 hours to read said x-ray, then pay co-pay, and pay parking, and leave with a roll of tape? They don’t do anything for broken toes.

F…M…L I can’t win


#13

[quote]biglifter wrote:
I was in the Philippines right before Subic Bay was shutdown. We would need a v2.0 of this thread to hold what I could share from that.[/quote]

Was there in '88 & '90. The Honeyco’s must have been out in the streets wailing.


#14

[quote]NvrTooLate wrote:

[quote]biglifter wrote:
I was in the Philippines right before Subic Bay was shutdown. We would need a v2.0 of this thread to hold what I could share from that.[/quote]

Was there in '88 & '90. The Honeyco’s must have been out in the streets wailing.[/quote]

Awwwwwww damn son. I probably staggered by you in the streets at some point. Was there days before Mt. Pinatubo decided to go boom.


#15

Bass I’m super sorry about your foot. I dropped a plate (only 25#) on my foot (left as well) a while ago. My toenail still isn’t growing back right.

Heal up soon <3


#16

[quote]biglifter wrote:

[quote]NvrTooLate wrote:

[quote]biglifter wrote:
I was in the Philippines right before Subic Bay was shutdown. We would need a v2.0 of this thread to hold what I could share from that.[/quote]

Was there in '88 & '90. The Honeyco’s must have been out in the streets wailing.[/quote]

Awwwwwww damn son. I probably staggered by you in the streets at some point. Was there days before Mt. Pinatubo decided to go boom.[/quote]

I left long before the eruption. I miss the Battle Wagon burger at the Spanish Gate.


#17

Remember these?


#18

I miss some of my piercings, but I don’t think I have the balls to do them again.


#19

[quote]NvrTooLate wrote:
Remember these?[/quote]

Ah yes, Jeepneys (sp?). My first experience in getting ripped off in a foreign land :). They saw us coming from a mile away.


#20

[quote]imhungry wrote:
I got caught kissing another man’s wife… by her husband.[/quote]

what happened then?