T Nation

I'm Back: This Time Its Comical

“One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”
Maya Angelou

Show courage today and mock a legend.

I don’t have that kind of courage.

Not comical at all. Pretty lame, actually.

Is there a particular legend we should be mocking? scratches head

Prof X’s Split Shitting.

Honestly to tell you, the only way you’re gonna shit well is if you practice the different stages of the process once a week. But you should hit that stage as hard as possible and let it rest for a week, and then hit it again.

Sure a total shit will work the shit in general, but in order to really master the shit, you would need more than one way to take a shit at certain stages, to build the force of that particular push and movement.

For Example:
Day one, Squatting and sitting form
Day two, Intestine control
Day three, Push movement
Day four, Pull movement
Day five, wiping,washing
day 6,7 rest.

Yes, it’s in good fun and I’m talking out of my ass.

The Ramones suck. They always have and always will. Fuck the Ramones.

There’s no way I’ll ever get used to thinking of you as Professor Why. Welcome back anyway though I’m as certain there will be those who do not share that thought as I am that you already know this. Should be interesting indeed.

So, this is for real? Why the name change?

[quote]jsbrook wrote:
So, this is for real? Why the name change?[/quote]

I’m leaning towards this not being the real deal. Why not just change the name instead of re-register?

That is not Prof X.

[quote]jsbrook wrote:
So, this is for real? Why the name change?[/quote]

No it isn’t. Gay joke.

(in Cartman’s voice)
“Lame!”

[quote]MaloVerde wrote:
That is not Prof X.[/quote]

Very observant… it’s Professor Why

loving the shit split haha… all the SHIT Jedis will love it.

Sayers wrote: “A facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought.”

Not in this case, though. I appreciate this new approach.

[quote]MikiB wrote:
Prof X’s Split Shitting.

Honestly to tell you, the only way you’re gonna shit well is if you practice the different stages of the process once a week. But you should hit that stage as hard as possible and let it rest for a week, and then hit it again.

Sure a total shit will work the shit in general, but in order to really master the shit, you would need more than one way to take a shit at certain stages, to build the force of that particular push and movement.

For Example:
Day one, Squatting and sitting form
Day two, Intestine control
Day three, Push movement
Day four, Pull movement
Day five, wiping,washing
day 6,7 rest.

Yes, it’s in good fun and I’m talking out of my ass.[/quote]

You win the thread.

[quote]MikiB wrote:
Prof X’s Split Shitting.

Honestly to tell you, the only way you’re gonna shit well is if you practice the different stages of the process once a week. But you should hit that stage as hard as possible and let it rest for a week, and then hit it again.

Sure a total shit will work the shit in general, but in order to really master the shit, you would need more than one way to take a shit at certain stages, to build the force of that particular push and movement.

For Example:
Day one, Squatting and sitting form
Day two, Intestine control
Day three, Push movement
Day four, Pull movement
Day five, wiping,washing
day 6,7 rest.

Yes, it’s in good fun and I’m talking out of my ass.[/quote]

This method is crap compared to conjugate methods.

Day one- explosive effort; shit hard and fast, 3 reps/8-10 sets with focus on reducing the ssc(spink shortening cycle). Thats 24-30 kerplunks for those of you concerned with volume.

Day two- Max effort; Warm up and work up to 85-105% of your absolute max. warmups should focus on speed, but in the work sets you should be dropping a deuce that would make an onion cry.

All movements are followed by the secondary work of wiping and washing. Cryo-cups and tux are highly recomended as recovery aids.

The best potty trainers in the world allready know -“If you ain’t cracking porcelain, you don’t know SHIT!”

Special thanks to BFG, aka Bastard X for his groundbreaking work in the field. :wink:

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
but in the work sets you should be dropping a deuce that would make an onion cry.
[/quote]

LOL

I’m so confused…

After seeing some of the other work from this poster I too am skeptical of the authenticity.

[quote]Tiribulus wrote:
After seeing some of the other work from this poster I too am skeptical of the authenticity.[/quote]

Bahaha. After reading just one of his other posts I know it’s not him. This dude is trying way too hard to be poetic.

It would be fun to crack someones password and post as them. Professor X might use the name of one of his bikes or maybe Magneto. Heck, maybe bicuspid or something like that. I don’t think it would be hard to crack a lot of peoples passwords. I wonder if ya get kicked out for such an offense.