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I'm a Train Wreck

Alright, yes, I am a train wreck. I’m 28, nearly 29. I stand 5’8" and weigh 260 lbs. How much is muscle? Not much, my BF% is a faaaaantastic 50%. Oh yeah. That’s right. I’ve got tits bigger than Lara Flynn Boyle (but who doesn’t?). My penis is like Bigfoot, I’m pretty sure it exists, but it’s only rarely glimpsed. And leaves intriguing footprints.

Anyway… I’ve got stretch marks like a woman that had triplets. I’m as strong as an asthmatic 80 year old. I breathe hard going up stairs.

I’m goddamn tired of being a fat bastard.

Here’s some history: I’ve always been overweight, but never this bad. I worked out some back in high school. In my early 20’s I did martial arts until I injured my shoulder at work (rotator cuff). Physical therapy helped until I re-injured it a year or so later working on my truck. I did yoga for a couple months and really liked it. But an extended vacation took me out of my habit and that was the end of that.

I lost my job, and so stopped going to the dojo for lack of cash. I went back to college to get a degree, and that’s when things really went downhill. I sat in my car for 45 minutes each way while driving. I grabbed fast food on my way to school. While there, I SAT in class, then I SAT in the computer lab. For most of the day. I’d SIT to study then when I’d get home, I’d eat late and watch TV. My ass was planted pretty much all day, every day. I attempted some workouts at home, but never really stuck with them for that long. Now, I’ve gotten a job where I sit at a computer for 10 hours a day. Which, also, has not helped my shoulder. Or my ass.

Well, I’ve cleaned up my diet some. I have a Cliff bar for breakfast (low glycemic, 9g of protein) as opposed to a McD’s sandwich. I have yogurt for a snack as opposed to nothing or cookies. For lunch I’ve been having lunch meat wraps or asian soups (Thai Kitchen) as opposed to Chipotle, cheesesteaks, or burgers. For a second snack I have either yogurt or an apple as opposed to a candy bar. Dinner has been cut back from being absolutely HUGE to being more reasonable and more healthy. I really only drink water, tea and coffee. I have an occasional beer and the even rarer pop. Like maybe once a month rare.

As for exercise, well, the most I get is jerking off in the shower (I’m going for strength, so I try to stick to 3x3’s). Okay, seriously, I’ve been walking more, trying to do some jumping jacks, stair push-ups and bodyweight squats. I’ve also been using some bands to try and rehab my shoulder some. The pushups kind of make it ache after 3 sets of 10.

Health, well I wheeze if I breathe really heavy for a while. I mentioned my shoulder before. I have a slight groin hernia, very slight, a doc checked it out. I laid it to my wife a little too hard one night apparently. Occasionally I have knee pain, shock of shocks. My cholesterol is 230, and my fasting glucose is 88.

So, a guy at work wanted to lose 25 lbs, from 175 to 150. I decided to make a wager with him, to give me some drive. I have to lose 37 lbs (14% of my body weight) before he does to win. So now I finally have some motivation. To beat his ass.

Equipment I’ve accumulated: ancient stationary bike, 5-foot standard bar with various weights, a thick bar made from pipe, 2 sets of adjustable dumbbells, a couple physio balls, a heavy bag, a pull up bar, an ab wheel (tweaked my shoulder a bit on that), a jumprope, and a bench.

I’ve read the Training for Newbies articles. What other reading is recommended? Although, I tend to be the kind of guy who reads all about a subject, and then does nothing with that knowledge. I do not want that to happen again.

I’ve been frustrated with myself for far too long, and I’m tired of being winded by a light jog, tired of my heart beating fast after running upstairs, tired of feeling stiff, achy and weak.

So, Does anyone have some tips for a simple fat loss exercise program? I want to clear the brush before I build a mansion. I know this won’t be easy or quick, but I’m hoping someone can slap some training wheels on me and give me a shove in the right direction. And cure me of my love of metaphor and similes, maybe.

I thank you in advance for your help.


is your routine. Do front squats instead of back if you don’t have a rack.

Eating:
5 meals a day @ about 500 calories each will vary quite a bit. =2500 calories. Which is probably a good place to start out. Lean meats, veggies, whole grains, and fruits should be your majority.

An examply would be:
Breakfast:
3 eggs
cup of oats
juice

Mid day:
beef jerky
bag of veggies
milk

Lunch:
Huge amount of variety here

PWO:
protien shake

Dinner:
huge variation here also

a shake before bed.

Now of protien carbs and fats. Fats are good for you. Trans fats are not. Olive oil is a godsend, use it in your cooking. YOur carbs should be limited. Most of them should come before noon and some at dinner. oatmeal, grain bread, veggies, and fruits should be your major carb sources. Protien should be consumed at each meal. I’m sure other people will have plenty to chip in but I need to hit the hay. Goodluck.

You need to start eating better. Your diet is way off.

Lucky for you, you’ve come to the right place to learn about proper nutrition.

The best piece of advice i can give you is to spend the weekend reading all the nutrition articles on this site. Then, come back, and ask whatever question(s) you have. The responses you’ll recieve will be more favorable/useful.

There is no need to guess(wing it/play it by ear,etc)- all the info you need is here on this site.

educate yourself and apply it- it’s a lifestyle-not a quick fix.

Good luck.

[quote]zephead4747 wrote:


is your routine. Do front squats instead of back if you don’t have a rack.

Eating:
5 meals a day @ about 500 calories each will vary quite a bit. =2500 calories. Which is probably a good place to start out. Lean meats, veggies, whole grains, and fruits should be your majority.

An examply would be:
Breakfast:
3 eggs
cup of oats
juice

Mid day:
beef jerky
bag of veggies
milk

Lunch:
Huge amount of variety here

PWO:
protien shake

Dinner:
huge variation here also

a shake before bed.

Now of protien carbs and fats. Fats are good for you. Trans fats are not. Olive oil is a godsend, use it in your cooking. YOur carbs should be limited.

Most of them should come before noon and some at dinner. oatmeal, grain bread, veggies, and fruits should be your major carb sources. Protien should be consumed at each meal. I’m sure other people will have plenty to chip in but I need to hit the hay. Goodluck.
[/quote]

I’m not sure that’s a good exercise program at this point.

Train Wreck - which exercises hurt your shoulder? Can you bench with a BB or DB? What’s wrong with your shoulder?

Sandoval’s on point with the shoulder question. It will limit much of what you do, and it’s best to clear up what you can or can’t do.

Your’s is perhaps an extreme case of ‘walk before you run’. I know you want to lose a ton of fat really quickly, but your body is literally not in condition to do a bunch of strenuous stuff. This isn’t an excuse to not work hard, but the sweating and pining will be more relegated to the kitchen than a gym.

Start by walking. It doesn’t burn a whole bunch of calories, but it’s effective in almost direct proportion to how much you do. An hour is great. Two hours is better. Don’t throw your life away for it, but walk a great deal.

For you, bodyweight squats, pushups, and rows are a great starting point (rows are the exact opposite of pushups- you pull your horizontal body towards something above you). Pick a challenging number of reps, and do five sets of each, three times a week. It’s not the greatest program ever. The point is to

a) Get in your schedule time to workout and
b) Get in your body the ability to handle itself.

I’m assuming these won’t harm your shoulder. If they do, don’t do them. Just do more squats.

As far as diet goes, the point for you know will be to clean it up. You’ve done a good job so far. Junk food is out, pop is out (do you guys really call it that? It just sounds so… strange), you’re packing a lunch and getting good protein. Good so far.

Zeps main points are right: eat often, eat protein, eat healthy fats, and limit carbs to the early part of the day. I’m gonna go a bit farther and recommend that the last few meals you eat (basically lunch, snack, and dinner) you have a slab of meat (8 oz), a thick slab of veggies, and some healthy oil. I recommend this because

  1. Veggies fill you up, and are healthy for you.
  2. Healthy fats (extra virgin olive oil, flax oil, grapeseed oil… but mostly extra virgin olive oil) have incredible properties regarding heart health. That and the more fat your body gets to use for fuel, the better your body gets used to using fat for fuel and the more of your body fat it’ll use for fuel.
  3. Meat is just cool to eat. You don’t feel like you’re dieting when you’re downing steak (or chicken, or fish… or horse, if you do that sort of thing). I mean, yeah, change it up, but meat is good for you. 8 oz is usually easy to measure, it doesn’t have to be exact, and it usually has about 50g of protein in it.

Beware of supplements. Supplements are wonderful, they really are, but they’re no substitute for good diet. They also won’t work if you fall off the wagon, and are pretty much a waste of money unless your diet is spot on.

That’s all I can really think of. Get back to us on your shoulder injury and what you can do.

And good luck.

You probably don’t need this, but it’s something Aragorn wrote for another member that I feel is important to hear.

[quote]Welcome. I’d suggest reading the stickied threads at the top of this Beginner’s Forum. Then read the articles that are linked in those stickied threads. Read, read, read. Knowledge is power when it comes to transforming yourself.

Also, you should be warned that this site is sort of a ‘playground’ or locker room for alpha males and alpha females. So there tends to be a lot of tough love that goes to everyone, especially the newbies/beginners. Some times it goes beyond tough love.

But at any rate I would grow a thick skin and be ready to take advice, even when it is offered in kind of a ‘back hand’ fashion. It’s a rite of passage for a lot of people–I went through it when I joined this site many years ago as well.

The people who are coachable will stay and transform themselves, the ego driven people or the people seeking ‘half measures’ and quick fixes will leave to lick their wounds.

That being said, it really is a very helpful place. Vets know their stuff, contributors stay around to answer questions in their forum area, it really is the best place on the net for changing your life. We just don’t coddle anyone for any reason. :slight_smile: You have been warned.

Rules to changing your life and physique:

  1. There are no shortcuts. Consistency and perseverance are almighty.

  2. There are no shortcuts. Consistency and perseverance are almighty.

  3. There are no shortcuts. Consistency and perseverance are almighty.

  4. Use the search function before posting questions–generally it will save you time and some criticisms. If you read something you don’t understand in an article, ask a question about it! Generally if people know that you’ve been doing some background reading they don’t give you a hard time. We’ve been having a rash of lazy posters who don’t use the search function lately.

  5. Read first, ask later. This goes with the above rule, just to make your life easier. We have 10 years of articles on here in the archives. Also, you are GUARANTEED to get confused by reading things–this is fine, this is normal. The nice thing about this site is the info.

By far the best and most thorough on the web. The bad thing about this site is “Analysis Paralysis” for newbs. ASK Questions on stuff you read!

  1. Along with the above point–doing >> reading. Pick a program and a nutrition plan, and STICK TO IT. You can read while you work. Besides, even if your plan isn’t the best thing, you’ll make progress as long as you put effort into things. And some progress, even if it is slow or less than optimal, is always ALWAYS better than no progress.

  2. This is a bodybuilding site. We have lots of guys interested in strongman or powerlifting or martial arts or athletics more than bodybuilding (I would be among those people). It’s perfectly OK if your goals aren’t to bench 500 lbs, or get to 250 lbs of lean muscle. That’s fine, we accept all serious comers.

And many of us started out “just getting in shape” but somewhere along the lines we converted to the “dark side”. But this site is about getting big and strong, so please respect those who choose the competitive bodybuilding lifestyle, including steroids. (We’ve been having a rash of the “I don’t want to get too big” and bodybuilding bashing posters lately too)

  1. Don’t get impatient–total transformation takes years. Not a couple months. Lots of progress can be made when you start, sure, but build the foundation strong and deep.

  2. Simple = Progress. Don’t overthink things. Well, do that, but not while sitting on your arse. Doing anything is superior to doing nothing, even if you are confused in your mind.

  3. Forget everything you “thought” you knew about lifting, diet and nutrition–everything the infomercials tell you, every thing the popular media tells you. Trust me on this. High protein intake will not destroy your kidneys, steroids will not kill you, training your lower back is in fact GOOD for you, all fat is not bad, all carbs are not bad…blah blah blah.

  4. this site is about the pursuit of excellence. Period. It doesn’t matter how long the journey is, only that you pursue it whole heartedly and unrelentingly.

  5. This road is not easy. This road is not short. This road is beset on all sides by saboteurs who want to see you fail. This road is painful. This road is also enlightening in every sense of the word.

  6. Changing your physique is the Single. Hardest. Thing. you will ever do, unless you count beating brain cancer or similar. Changing your physique required wholesale LIFESTYLE changes. Not a ‘diet’ but a lifestyle. For the rest of your life. Forever.

Change the way you think about food, the way you act, the way you plan your day, the way you walk into the grocery store. There’s no other way to do it. I did it this way, and you can too.[/quote]

great advice from everyone here for this guy.

only thing I can reiterate is start slow.
if you are anything like me you wont want to but just start by walking and eating right.
the fat melts off when you start eating the right things in the right amounts.
everything else follows

I think otep hit it on the head with this one, especially his point on #12 from Aragorn.

Especially in this case where you are competing with a coworker… be wary that others my try to tempt you into failing on your diet in more ways than one. Diet is what can ruin it all… the mentality that (one cheesecake won’t hurt, i’ll just spend xx amount of time walking/running)… never works out.

I read on here someplace about a trick you can use to offset any negative thinking.

use the rubberband trick.have a big newspaper rubber band around your wrist and anytime you have a self defeating thought you snap it and replace it with a good thought.

eg. that muffin Sally Rottencrotch brought in to work looks good snap ewww that stuff she has will give me man boobs…wheres my carrots.

I have a thought, but it might not meet your needs as far as speed is concerned (i.e. you are competing with a coworker to lose weight quickly). It might be good to start with some work on your GPP (Gross Physical Preparedness) given how much ass-sitting you claim to do in your life, and how little you are physically active. It might not be a super-fast weight-loss plan, but if your main goal is weight-loss and generally increasing your fitness levels and health, it is a great place to start, especially if your goals are more longterm.
If this sounds good to you, search the site for GPP, and some stuff will definitely come up!
Dan

Sounds like you’re off to a good start. The hardest part is DOING it. Read the nutrition articles, but try no to overthink it - that’s when most people up and quit, because they think it’s too complicated.

Eat Meat, Fish, Poultry
Eat Green Veggies
Eat Whole grains and nuts (but watch the calories on nuts - it’s easy to go over)
Eat the occasional fruit
Use Olive Oil liberally :slight_smile:

Most important of all, though, is listen to that little voice inside your head that says “I DON’T WANT TO BE A FATTY ANYMORE.”

Every time you have a moment of doubt, instead of using a rubber band, just jump up and feel the weight of your moobs come crashing down. I’m sure that will give you the motivation to remain in control. When you can jump up and not feel them, you won’t need the reminder anymore.

Good luck on your transformation!!

Hey dude, you doin it?

Don’t leave us hanging Trainwreck. : )

I know it seems overwhelming now, but it’s worth it.

I know it’s a corny sounding cliche’ but it’s true: “Nothing taste as good as fit feels.”

You can do this bro.