T Nation

If you found out...

I guess this one depends upon if the guy knew she was in a relationship or not.
If not then no there is no reason for giving the guy a good pounding.But if he was aware and went ahead anyway then to be quite honest he deserves a good shooing.
However there is never any justification for hitting a lady no matter how you feel.

I totally agree with Bp.
Just don’t totally dump her.
Keep her on the side everytime you need to get your rocks off.
Treat her like the slut that she is and it’s up to her if she wants to stick around.

She’s no lady if she does a thing like that, but I get the idea. :stuck_out_tongue:

This subject came up several years ago while having a few beers with my brother-in- laws and thier cousins. Some said they would kick the guy’s ass,others said they would just leave etc. My father- in -law,who was about half lit then spoke up and said “Hell, I’d just hand the son of a bitch ten dollars and tell him to go find some GOOD pussy”.

I’ve waited on this one, but think it’s time I weighed in. I read this one in (of all places) a Stephen King novel years ago (forgot which one). The guy comes in and see’s this little $h!t moving on his wife. He gets out the shotgun, puts it up to his mouth and pulls the trigger (with an appropriately dramatic lead-in conversation). “Click” Gun is empty. The guy is totally whimpering and messes his drawers. He then sends the guy packing.

Totally humiliating. Shows her that he’s a total wimp. It’s just poetic.

Reacting in anger/violence is simply further abdication of your power to her. Think about it–what such violent reactive behaviour is really saying is “your actions determine how I feel and how I respond.” This is how chumps respond to such situations. True alpha males are in control of their emotions and they will not allow a female to manipulate, exploit or control them–directly or indirectly. In short, real men do not allow a woman to be the thermostate for their emotional state. They are in charge of themselves–not her. I’m not propounding a fantasty here–as if a man can our should remain totally unaffected by the negative behaviour of a female he cares for–as if he is a robot without feelings. What I am saying is that an alpha male retains control of how he chooses to respond and to simply react in anger is female-like and childish and not how a true man should respond. Another thing: such a response places more value on such a woman than she merits. To fight for her or because of her places her on a pedestal of which she is not worthy. Violent Reactive actions say, “your valuable enough for me to invest time, effort and risk.” Men need to start sticking together and stop allowing women to play them off against each other. Men who act in the manner that you described are insecure and that is why they tend to experience being cheated on more than what is typical. Women are attracted to and desire a man who is in control (despite what they may tell you or themselves when deceiving themselves). A man who cannot control his own emotional state has lost that battle before it has begun. Such men will tend to not hang onto their women because as soon as a women can control you or manipulate you emotionally, they will begin to lose respect for you and will start to stray. True Alpah males never show excessive anger; never allow a woman to “get their goat.” Never show their full hand. This keeps a woman intrigued and mystified. She wants to be in control but cannot; because she cannot, she admires & respects you. Also, Women want emotional stability because that is precisely what they lack much of the time. Of course, once your married the whole power dynamic changes and, therefore, so do much of the relational rules–but the whole respect/control element still has it’s, although less important, place. This whole control thing explains allot. This is why you should never ask a female for her number or email–you should structure opportunities and challenges in order to ellicit this information from her. At the outset, you should never state your desire or attraction for/to her–that will only bore her and she will stamp “LJBF” on your forehead. If she is a 9 or a 10 you need to lower her self-esteem a little (called a “Neg Hit” by pickup artists) not boost it further. Chumps and suckers supplicate and abdicate power. Alpha males practice the principles of the Tao of Steve!

Give her the gift that keeps on giving. HERPIES.LOL

I’d kill the guy based on principle. And if he didn’t know you I can’t think of a better way to meet. Think of yourself as a male lion defending your pride (literally and figuratively). It happened to me once and I gave the guy a good beating. as far as beating up your girlfriend, ex or otherwise, that’s a little much. Sleep with her best friend or sister or something like that. Or put her picture on the internet if you have a good one. Send it to her dad if thats an option.

Wow Anna, that’s quite a story. You moved here for love, and this guy cheated on you with some heifer. I have a question: you wrote “it has affected the relationship in and out of bed”. Does this mean you’re still with him? If I’m not overstepping any boundaries, would you mind telling me why? And how has the relationship changed?

I really don’t know where to start on answering this one! However: there was so much going on concerning my situation and after all the arguments about what happened and so on…without going into details here. I told him I would stay and if he wanted to hang around fine, but he would have ‘earn’ my trust again! I have made some pretty stupid mistakes in my life andno one is perfect. I know I would want another chance if I really wanted to be with someone. Things are very different from when I first met this ‘chap’. I have changed and obviously so have my feelings! I know that I will not tolerate another instance of this. In the beggining I tried to pretend it never happened and got on with it. It was not that simple! I had to work with her. Her friends would tell me all the details to try and find ‘a chink in my armour’. I knew I was better than that and I never showed any reaction to it, ‘‘you can’t dress mutton up as lamb’’!I found out her husband had hung himself, her children had been taken away from her, and how she often attemted to kill herself. I realized what a sad person she was and was going nowhere in her life! The ‘guy’ I was with was just another of her many sad attempts to find someone to be with and 'took advantage of her being so desperate… easy lay my friends! He took the easy lay thinkig I would never find out about it. I have sooo moved on from all this and get along with him now and use him when I feel like it. He begs for me to say I love him again and will do anything for me. Whats done is done! I don’t know if that answers anything for you…

I’d turn my baseball cap backwards, march my ass right outside, get into my parent’s Toyota Corolla, and circle the neighborhood playing “Cop Killer” really loud with the window rolled down That’ll teach ‘em all! Suckas! And make sure the ex hears how loud your music is, it conveys how angry you are. And if you’re cryin’, you can always call my cell.

MBE: "Evidently the potency of translingual Powerdrive lasts over 10 hours, since 10 hours ago."


This has happened to me 3 times now. Sure, I get mad but I have found that the best response is to “swear off” this girl and simply never talk to her or give her the time of day again. Ever. Works like a charm. In the end, you have your self respect and, if she’s a cheater, then she ain’t worth a dime to begin with. Be tough man.