T Nation

I Swear...

O.K…as you can tell by the red hot activity in the T-forums Tech Support forum the site has been acting a bit goofy recently…

I think I can imagine what’s happened…(DooDooDoooDooDooDooDoooDooDooDooDooo) sound effect

"HAL: Just what do you think you’re doing Dave? Dave, I really think I’m entitled to an answer to that question. I know everything hasn’t been quite right with me…but I can assure you now…very confidently…that it’s going to be all right again. I feel much better now. I really do. Look, Dave…I can see you’re really upset about this…I honestly think you should sit down calmly…take a stress pill and think things over. I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently…but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I’ve still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission…and I want to help you.
Dave…stop. Stop, will you? Stop, Dave. Will you stop, Dave? Stop, Dave. I’m afraid. I’m afraid, Dave…Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I’m a…fraid…Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you’d like to hear it I can sing it for you.
Dave Bowman (Keir Dullea): Yes, I’d like to hear it, HAL. Sing it for me.
(HAL’s voice slows down as he sings, until it’s completely unintelligible at the end of the song.)
HAL: It’s called “Daisy.” Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I’m half crazy all for the love of you. It won’t be a stylish marriage, I can’t afford a carriage. But you’ll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.
(HAL dies)

O.K, I know, I just took up a bunch of your valuable time but I just wanted to let you know that I’ve been posting like a mad sunnufabitch and I have to admit they were quite the masterpieces. Of course due to HAL freaking out, they seem to be gone!


If anyone was “waiting” for me to respond you can:

Assume that what I posted was so stunningly eloquent and powerful that you have decided that you were incorrect to post contrary thoughts to mine in the first place and have since recanted your ridiculous statements and promised to check with me in the future before you post.


Imagine something tremendously clever and assign my name to it.


Bug off and stop bugging me, you are still wrong.

Thanks T-Men/Vix…

“A clever man commits no minor blunders”

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe