I am sorry to hear of your loss. It seems like there are a couple of us who have lost our fathers in the last couple of years. My dad passed away two years ago and I still deal with it on a daily basis.
Allow yourself to go through the greiving proccess. There is no set time frame for you to be over it, and frankly I doubt we ever really get over it.
Please use your brothers and sisters of the T-Nation for support.
My deepest sympathies on your loss, loosing a parent is very tough. My own Dad passed about fours years ago and even though the pain mostly fades, it will still sneak up on you from time to time. Stay strong, but don’t be afraid to lean on your friends and family for support.
-Colin
Sorry for your loss Boone. I lost my Dad very suddenly. My story is on the T-forums somewhere. I know how you feel. It get’s better, but you won’t forget him. No matter what. I would kill to talk to my Dad again.
Billy
If it helps to hear others stories, here’s the link.
Billy
You’ve got my condolences man. Just remember the pain will fade with time. Don’t keep anything to yourself. Talk about how you’re feeling and what you’re thinking with your friends and family. Keeping everything in your head will only make things worse. If you’re religious, prayer will help soothe your feelings.
Praying for you and your family,
Fish
Kia kaha, bro. Stay strong.
I recently lost 3 close friends who passed away in a car crash two weeks ago. It was a terrible time for all of us who knew them, I cannot imagine what it would be like to lose a parent.
Be proud, it sounds like your old man fought till the end.
my deepest condolences to you and your family.
Boon…
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss. My boyfriend’s dad passed away at the end of November.
As well…a mother-figure to me passed away three years ago. It’s tough. BUT it really does get easier with time. The loss remains but after awhile the pain eases a little bit and you remember the good times. Please surround yourself with people who will be there for you when you need them. And if you learn anything from this…let it be to not take anyone for granted in your life.
My sincere condolences. Take it one day at a time and vent when you need to.
Boon…
As you can see… you have support here, with friends. I am incredibly sorry for your loss, it sounds as though you were there when it happened and the trauma that you have gone through must be overwhelming… if you need to, as others have expressed, talk… we are here for you.
Chessie…
My deepest sympathies.I have also lost both my parents.But keep them with me in my heart.
Boondoggler,
Unfortunately I can relate to you on this, five years ago, my father died of a massive heart attack in similar fashion. He had just turned 50 and I had just turned 25. I can honestly say that the pain has never really gone away, just dulled a bit. My father was not just my father but also one of my best friends as I’m sure yours was. You have my most sincere condolences and I wish you the best of luck in dealing with such a tragic situation.
My condolences go out to you and your family.
My thoughts are with you.
I Hope you celebrate him for all the wonderful things he contributed to this world. I prefer to think of funerals more like celebrations of peoples life lived.
Here is one of my fav poems
by Dermot McCarthy
When my father wet to wales in 61
for his fathers funeral
I was twelve
and knew nothing
Death was real but remote
like the origins of the world
or the Ed sullivan show
But having touched my father
death became a constant
in my world. Having taken his father
my own was suddenly vulnerable
to that theft, and from then on
I guarded him with the magic of a twelve-year old: words
things, the power of thought
unknown to him kept him free of that other’s possession.
Once he came close to falling:
I forgot or relaxed or was distracted
and he glimpsed his father’s world.
Never again would I be so negligent.
And though he will fall as he must
into his arms
I know it will not be the magic’s fault
or mine or anything to do with failure
He will fall as we all must
into a world which was once his own
and seeing his old man again
he will be happy and happy
will turn to brace his arms
for me following…
Eva
I’m sorry to hear of your loss. Keep him in your thoughts and memories and he is truly never gone.
What can I say. Thanks for the support everyone. Just thought I’d share a story with you all real quick.
I was sitting on my bed talking to my best friend last night at about midnight when someone knocked at our front door. I opened the door and found one of my neigbors standing there with tears in her eyes and a huge smile on her face. She had just come from the store where she had bought a bottle of wine to help get her mind of things. She had an extra buck and bought a lotto ticket using the #'s 02 07 20 04 (the date my dad died). She ended up matching all those #'s and won a few hundred bucks, she gave it all to my family. Ran some serious chills down my spine. Amazing stuff.
His name was Thomas Michael McMillan. I wasn’t with him when it happened. My brother and I were at a friend’s house. Fortunately my mom was with him the entire time.
[quote]"I lost my Dad almost 2 years ago. Christmas time makes me miss him all the more. If you’ll allow me, Let me tell you my story.
My wife and I were going to a company Christmas party in Calgary in Dec 2001. We were to fly to Vancouver and then to Calgary but the weather was very bad in Vancouver and Air Canada wasn’t taking off from Vancouver. So we thought we’d make the best of it and visit with my Dad and my sister and her family for the weekend. the last time I visited my Dad was a few years before. We missed the party but had a good visit.
The next March my Dad was pretty sick. He had met my oldest daughter a few years befor but hadn’t met my other daughter. I really wanted him to meet her. I took a weeks holidays and flew the family down to Vancouver on March 15. (Anybody know Shakespeare?)
We got in late on the Friday and decided to just go to my sisters where we were staying.
The next morning we went out to “Codfathers” in Port Moody for brunch and then the bunch of us went to Dad’s place to visit.
His car was in the drive-way, but he didn’t answer the door. I called his house number and I could hear it ringing inside but he didn’t answer the phone.
It took a while to find a crow-bar but we got one and broke in. My sister and I ran in. (I remember thinking he’ll be pissed off at the mud I was tracking in.)
We stopped at his bedroom door. I told my sister to give me a minute and I went in, closing the door behind me.
He was laying in his bed. There was an undescribable stillnes in the air. I grabbed his hand.
It was cold and stiff.
I missed him by one day. [/quote]
I posted this a few months ago. It does me good to think about my dad. You’ll heal up good Boon, just keep talking about it. Tell people. It helps.
Billy
My condolences.
Dan
sorry bro.
Boon,
Your still a student, as am I, you may not be able find the strength to continue with alot of interest in school, but education is the key to many things, and your father would want nothing more than to see his son suceed, i lost my grandfather recently and i wasnt really the person i wanted to be at that time, so now i am highly motivated to my school work,
my deepest sympathy’s to you and yours,
-Andrew
Sorry brother… I really am.