T Nation

I Fell and Nearly Died

in 2014 I fell at work and nearly died.

Im 45 now - and ffed up- but I lived.
commented that maybe sharing this would be interesting.

forgive the novel its really long

for legal reasons I must be a bit vague - no pictures - no locations etc.

HS college and post college wrestling. collegiate and Greco.
Two D1 schools - a run at the Olympic training center in colorado springs
a few trips on a plane bus or train with a big fat USA jersey

Judo from before HS and competed thru my 30’s
jujitsu recreationally - Oishi Judo and Renzo Gracie here in NYC when I felt like it.
some international competition in Greco and Judo
kept going with Judo til my late 30’s
I wanted to go into the military - spina bifida Occulta prevented that so I did sports in college instead
I sucked - but I showed up everyday and was good at cutting weight.
figure that part out on your own.
you can read my old junk under kmcnyc

pre fall numbers- for some perspective not real strong or real fast but this was at like 43 years old maybe I weighed 175.

squat mid 400’s 3x a week squat for 5 when every I wanted.
front squat 335 for 3 when ever
pulled 475 sumo for 5 while not training any kind of pulling for over a year
OverHead squat 205 x5 when ever I wanted
clean 225 when ever
multiple 7 minute mile when ever I wanted - 10 mile run when ever I wanted
box jumps - row machines - versa climber - hill sprints - or track sprints when ever
any intense cardio I wanted. usually 3x a week
Judo 2x per week til maybe 37-38 - teaching - rolling - competing.

I work in the entertainment business its like being in the trades.
the work side- the nuts and bolts physical side required to build concerts or major sporting events

Again I have to be a bit vague here.
In September 2014 I fell at work something like 13-17 ft backwards.
Insurance is saying 13 - carpenters and building are saying more like 17.
I worked a 140 plus week and fell backward in a luxury box to another luxury box in a stadium.

I got to work at 8- clocked out late late late - like 3 am the night before .
maybe it was 9. - black ice coffee - a few tylenol and an egg sandwhich
headed up to the booth- a luxury box in a stadium converted to an announcer booth for the game.

I Fell - out of the booth.

The piece of hardware- gear I was trying to retrieve- released and I fell backwards.
I scrambled to hold on - for a hand hold
and slid backwards-
I tried to tuck in and hold myself in a ball
but I fell.

I dont know what I landed on - but it hurt as FUCK
I kept falling and bounced off what ever I landed on -
turned out to be a chest height eating bar - to stand and eat or drink while watching the game
then I bounced on some hard plastic seats and landed on the concrete floor


there was a LOUD as FUCK noise- it was my pulse in my ear
Im hyperventilating- brassy taste in my mouth
I later know its adrenaline

A women in spanish - cleaning the room I fell into -
‘ay dios mio’ 'queres Agua’
im like sure Ill take agua - can you dial 911

I take a quick inventory - i can see I can hear I think
Im breathing so loud I cant tell .
Im fucked.
I can turn my head- I see my hands moving
I can move my leg
but not my left leg
I try to stand - its not happening
I grab the seats and stand-
the poor cleaning worm in screaming in spanish- I must in some way ask her to shhh
I yell - for a co worker- and In a few minutes I see his face poke over the balcony - or box I fell out of .
He is WTF and grabs his cel phone.
I grab a chair and pull myself up - but I fall and that hurts worse
Im pretty sure I broke my leg.
I cant stand up - I have to sit in the stands and it fucking hurts like fuck
really worse then being stabbed
my left leg cant bend and cant support weight like at all.
my head is bleeding - I dont know how much and my ears are still rushing
with what I later learn is just your pulse

while the guy upstairs is yelling - hang tight- he is calling whom ever on his phone.

a gentlemen in a suit and tie walks into the suite I fell in and is like
’wtf is wrong with you’
‘im like if you dont call 911 fuck the fuck off’

he starts to pick up my tools- I had a
OHT leatherman in a pouch
a pair of Klein Diagnoal cuters 8"
a klein 3227 spud wrench and
a large srew driver in my back pockets
go google those they are all pretty big- and I am lucky none of them killed me.

none of the tools penetrated my body.

dick in the suit is like ‘why did you do this’'we are trying to clean here’
Im pretty sure I thanked him for gathering my tools and told him to kindly get the fuck away form me.

the guy upstairs has rallied the troops- but I tried to call some of my guys-
working for me
but cel service is shit.

I hit redial on my cel- it took me to my union hall
I had spoken to someone there the day before.

It rings and clearly - caller ID Is working remeber its like 8am
’que se diche how you doing?
me ‘I fucking fell at work’
guy ’ holy shit I know where you are today’
guy’ are you ok ?"
me’ im fucked - I broke my leg - call so and so and have him come to me
I tried to call - didnt work’
guy’holy fuk - Ill get him - holy shit - are you ok ?'
me ‘Im fucked - call this bro and get it going’
‘call the client too- and Im not going to be able to manage this jobsite’

withen a few minutes - I have some bros I work with and some other people
(its a big big job site) around me - and IM like call 9 1 fucking 1 fuck you.

Im surrounded by - coworkers - some of my various onsite bosses
and a TON of stadium personal
Im sure I was a model patient and told everyone I was fine.

two young like 20 year old girls medics stadium employees show up
and say they are their to administer medical treatment- but I can waive
going to a hospital.

I kindly say something along the lines of ’ we are going to the fucking hospital’

I see my Big Bosses- and everyone I have answered too in the past few weeks surrounding me.
I know Im breathing hard and sweaty and I know I broke my leg.

a bunch of Fire men show up
and start to take over- the scene
Im strapped to a gurney - full neck collar
someone grabs my bag- stuff etc.
the fireman take over thank fucking god.
and we start to roll out- they tell me to hug my arms.
hug myself…

we start a 1/2 hour push through the stadium
out doors
its psychedelic- the different ceilings lights
bright lights
orange dim lights
dim lights
sun light

we are rolling into an ambulance
I’m surrounded by fireman and Police
who all start to quiz me on questions what will be the rest of my day

‘whats your name?’
‘what day is it?’
‘who is the president?’
‘what day is it?’
‘who do you work for?’
‘how old are you?’

‘you dong look 42?’
‘what kind of drugs are you on?’
‘your heart rate is very low are you stoned?’
‘are you high - its cool we dont care’
'does your eye always look like that ’

me is it diallated?" ‘is it bleeding?’

‘yeah buddy dont worry’
'seroiously - what are you on- drinks - drugs etc?"
me ’ 4 tylenol where are we going?
pretty sure Im SHOUTING -
'you are pretty relaxed- its cool bro are you high?

Im like ’ im surrounded by professionals- going to be taken care of by more professionals’
'tell me im ok-'
all the while who is the president?
what day is it?
what is your name?
at one point they are looking at me with the side eye- and im like
’am I screaming?'
cop is like 'nah dude your good - its natural little bit of adrenaline’
we get to ER
strapped on a gurney with no mobility - its stressfull.

immediately- my clothes- shoes etc are being cut off me
they throw it all out

'what happened?
does this hurt?'
what is your name?
blah blah blah

IM surrounded by ten or more faces- asking me what is wrong
all the while being stripped - needles - eyes examined etc.

answering the same
no yes
its friday
blah blah blah

at some point they are turing me on my side- sticking me with a hundred needles
and a GIANT probe- like a two foot stainless dildo they are trying to stick in my ass
they are telling me they need to see about internal bleeding
and I am feeling this freezing feeling lube on my ass and anus

'dont mind the cold its just lube’
some cunt is sticking a stainless 2 foot long if an inch probe into my ass
all the while a light is in my eyes- saying Im dilated and breathing is shallow
is my heart rate always low -
is this typical of my blood pressure- like this normally?
your BP and blood pressure seems really low- and you seen too relaxed are you high?
‘no- just tell me what is broke’
‘are you high?’
‘are you drunk’

slowly they are saying Im stable- and suddenly they are all backing away
Strong hands are Rolling me on my side and strapping me back up
and putting me back in a collar

I start freaking the fuck out

an Irish heavy heavy NYC accent is like if you lay still cunt Ill take a picture and find out
its an X-ray plate.
they strap me up and wheel my down to xray- where two techs take care of me

‘alright buddy hang tough hang tough’
‘lay still - shhhh shhhh where you from - which neighborhodd’
‘how did you do this?’
‘Jasus- how the fuck did you do that?’

they relax me- take their x-rays and cover me with blankets and push me down the hall
I start to have a mega adrenalin dump
and am shaking and pretty sure having tears

I guess at this point Ive been given with some morphine and had a shit ton of blood taken.
eventually im pushed in a hall way with like 7 million other people from ER

and eventually this nurse - WHO IS HOT AS FUCK - comes over and is like are you OK?
‘me ’ I fell but im ok’
nurse’ OMG are you the guy who fell ?‘
me’ yes im ok’
nurse’ are you hungry -babe do you want a sandwich’
really god bless her- hot as fuck professional as hell - and offering to feed my broke ass
I hope she is happy and has a good man or good woman.

‘are you cold? and she lifts my blankets’… ooooh your naked?‘
me ‘yes they cut off my clothes’
‘ok ok ok ok ’ let me take more blood’
eventually - Im have to pee.
I get someones attention from the deep deep hallway Ive been shoved in and
im like ’ i have to use the bathroom’
nurse’ lifts my sheet s and like your naked’
me ‘yes they cut my clothes off’
nurse’ is like ok but you have to get there on your own’
‘and take this cup and give a sample’
this was the first of literally 15 drug tests’

I try to get up and I cant
fuck you

I relly cant walk - my head is bandaged - IM on on god knows what
but I cant move right- left leg is kind of dead.
so I drag myself = crawling to the bathroom and pee in a cup.

Ive been here a few hours- had a friend call my wife- who is on her way to me-
IM like wait - its gonna be a while- Im ok.
she is in her car with borrowed shirt and sweat pants to get me home.

eventually - Im half conscious - god bless chemistry

and this guy shows up and is like
’ bubby Im your Dr,you are alive- no broken bones- no internal bleeding - your good to go.“
me ’ I have no clothes- and again someone for the tenth time is lifting my sheets to see’
dr.” if you can walk down the hall Ill let you go.’

He hands me a cane and I get up and start walking to the bathroom
’he is like Bro- you got to pee in this cup’

  • IM all sure

he is like ’ ’ its your lucky day- go buy a lotto ticket and hug your fam’

I get prescription and my kind wife is there to drive me home
she has a t-shirt- from like a ski resort and a pair of grey old school ill fitting sweat pants
part of the deal is she has to take a pic- to give to my boy who provided the spare clothes.

she has like gatorade and a chicken cutlet sandwich - in the car and a shit ton of paper from the hospital- notes for work - billing info - prescriptions

we get home- I hobble up the stairs and with allot of help
get in bed and pass out
I wake a few hours later in mega fucking pain and am having a bit of a breakdown

turns out the scrip is for percaset- and I use it.

I have to stop typing its late and this a bit emotional to say the least.

will follow up with another post


Motherfucking ouch.

I used to work at Commonwealth Stadium in Edmonton and often watching guys set up for shows would wonder how long until someone eats it badly. . .

Geez!!! That sounds horrible! I’d say you’re damn lucky to even be hobbling around after something like that.


I’ve gotten banged up at work a few times. One minute everything is fine, them Pow- it isn’t. That type of experience can be extraordinarily frustrating and demoralizing. Don’t let it get you down. Try to separate the physical pain from your psychological well being.

You sound like a pretty solid bad ass. Take inventory of those personal assets that make you one and realize that you still have them. Use them to get better.

It happens everywhere evetually - all the more reason to practice safe procedures

that is the best takeaway- that I lived.

you are so not kidding.
Heights - machinery - big voltage big amperage -
industrial settings and big equipment can make for a very dangerous work place.

Isn’t that something? I was just popping back in to see how this was going.

I was a tree cutter for 12 years and got away with just a broken hand early on. Feeding branches into our new chipper, a big cluster of branches clamped together as they went in, but my hand was stuck in the cluster. It broke a couple of metacarpal bones of the index and middle finger, but they came back together just fine.

Recently I stumbled on this guys channel. You can tell something bad is going to happen, then it does.

Doesn’t look like much at first, but its a doozie.

I was just watching a couple of the follow up videos before I got here.

thanks for the replies-
that was the blow by blow of the fall.

I get home in my borrowed grey sweats , and cane-
hop and hobble up the stairs and lay the fuck down.

I probaly sleep for a few hours - but keep getting up as its hard as F to sleep when shit hurts.

I will skim again over some of the legalities - insurance ect.

wake up the next day- cant get up the first few times,
Im home alone- I take a percaset- the gift bag form the ER
eat something have coffee take a shower and get dressed

I lived - I feel awesome
i foam rolled and used an LX ball thinking that would help with some of the swelling.
have not turned rainbow colors yet.

hobble down the stairs and head out- I walk something ridicueles like 2 miles-
just strolling around finding out how to use the cane and be somewhat mobile

I did promise my wife that I would not go to the gym.
get home - and go through the start process of seeing a dr
I look up some local Dr. and find someone what runs a physical therapist office-
I et an appointment monday as its saturday.

the hazy drugs wear off - and I am in a bit of pain - but fuck it I lived.
I am trying to figure out what I should do about work on the following week.

sunday is a haze of chemical happiness
monday my wife drives me to see the Dr.
I meet with a nurse- physicians assistant
and are both - like
you did what?
you fell?

from how high?
, that sounds bad.
like really bad.

what are you on- how many did you take.
we are going to take blood.
and can you pee in this container.

Physicians assistant is a big big football type-
gets me on a table- helps me undress- and is like
’yeah’ your jacked up.
Im saying like 60/40 that you might need surgery.
lets get you off to an MRI and some other imaging’

I am standing - and turn around to pick my track pants- and he is like
’shit- hold on, lets see that’
he helps me over to the mirror - where from halfway up my hamstring and trough my calf
is red’
me 'that isnt good’
PA- ‘thats blood, pooling in there’
'I lied - you are like 70/30 that you will need surgery’
He also leaves to ge the DR.
the Doc is an even bigger guy- well over 6 feet and jacked in that I was big once way.

I must be high as a fuking kite.
He checks out my knee- the swelling the hamstring- and is like
’this- this slackness- is looking pretty bad, your going to get an MRI and then I will call you tonight.

we get an MRI same day- I should have figured this was unusual.
but Im stoned off my ass.
5 minutes into the MRI ai am passed the fuk out.
probably the best 45 minutes of sleep I got that week.

after the MRI they are doing some ultra sound on my knee- my phone rings.
Its the Dr, - he is like you need to come back to my office asap.

what the fuck.

so we drive the 5mins back to the Dr, and he is in the lobby.
'hey- we need to talk’
me – how bad is it.
Dr. just smiles.
'do you have a GP?
me- no we just moved.
dr- do you have a surgeon you have worked with? maybe you have a sports guy?
me- are you serious? fuck.
dr. 'lets step in here- he helps me sit on the table - and wheels over a skeleton.
he starts and clearly he is perplexed- Im sure im grinning stupid on pills.

‘I dont know where to Start- this is a shit show of a knee’
You have destroyed the ACL, the post lateral corner is torn and your PCL might also need replacing,
MCL_ gone, meniscus dont bother. your patella is kind of fucked - and you tore two heads of the hamstring off the bone’

I cant really say much here- but ‘get out’ how am I walking around?’

he is like- well your gonna stop- your going to need at least two maybe three surgeries.
the acl is easy- the hamstring and other repair- they are probably going to staple screw wire and sew back in place- let me call this surgeon for you right now’

Im sitting there wondering wtf this means with work and how long will I be fucked.
and who is going to tell my wife.

Dr sets up an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow- shit is fast

'I over hear them talk and this dr is like the MRI results are staggering- you are going to have to see this kid tomorrow. Its that bad.

'I ask - when can I get back to work?
how long is this going to fucking take?
He is like you are going to be out for the better part of a year.
maybe in 8 - 10 months you can point and supervise.
but I can tell you like your gym- thats gonna help you.

he explains that this surgeon is a 'bread and butter orthepedic knee guy and does 20-30 knees a month- he is a bit eccentric and has no bedside manner .
but he is great ’

he helps me out to the car and offers to tell my wife-
I tell my wife and she is all WTF

sleep like ass- and my leg is starting to really turn colors now - I fell on Friday its tuesday.
we drive over to the Surgeon and its not to far either.

hobble into the office-

Im asked
injury- I fell
how far?

'oh thats pretty far’
left or right’
knee or shoulder’
what are you on currently? how many?
can you please provide a urine sample while we wait for the dr.

are people just roaming the earth on meth- going to work on a cocktail of heroin and crack? or on 20 oxy cotin ground up and snorted.
I must be missing out.

I get to see the Dr - he is a thin guy - like high 50’or early 60s.
he is like ok lets see.
grabs the now swollen leg- has me turn standing and laying down .

Tells me he is going to have to do a ‘big cut’ and replace the ACL
from the middle of my patella tendon - I only do the patella graft "
‘then Im going to roll you on your side - and repair all that other crap’
should be about two - maybe three hours.
Ill set it up with insurance - see you in 5-7 days, thanks’

I actually ask him for some drugs.
the 10 or so pills the hospital left me with is gone.
He is really stern ’ and give me a note for more percaset
and also warns me- ‘you have to really watch these’

and again Im leaving a Dr office wondering WTF happened.

the next five or so days kind of blend- and my shit is like purple
swole as fuck and just as painful.
the hamstring is kind of crawling up the back of my leg towards my glutes

I have a pre-surgical visit- they do an electrocardiogram
and yes- they ask to pee in a cup.

they go over the procedures- etc and set a date.
I cant sleep and am having some serious nightmares
waking up terrified
dreaming of being knocked out- and a black rubber thing engulging my face and I cant breathe

Ill type more in a day or so…

All my respect. Thanks for sharing your story and recovery. Just be safe.

sorry you had to go through this but god damn you tell a good story

Damn, sorry to hear

a regular thing, or like special project/golden overtime pay or something?

I did a couple 120+ building a Costco. It had a 50K/day penalty for non-completion. Some guys were pulling 24’s, sleep 8, repeat.

That was a meat grinder. One guy fell off of a ladder, another got hit by a van, I got a drill bit driven into my leg.

Thats when things get ugly.

You have my respect. The fact that you still rep out squats over 3 plates is testament to your character.

thanks- just be safe is the most important part

over time is part of the entertainment business.
that project was an exception not a typical week

12-16 hour days are pretty common.

thanks- I have to keep training at any level - or I loose some sanity
and I really cant walk or do stuff well without training

then you can go on instagram and find 125lb people crushing what I do in the gym

thank you I thought sharing was the best point.

your so not kidding.
there are a ton of new entities that do studies workshops and try to enforce stuff- so shit like this doesnt happen.

but it does.

so - I am counting the days to surgery at this point.

in all fairness it happened very quickly.
fell on a friday- had first dr visit on a monday- saw a surgeon on a tuesday
and had surgery something like 10 days after the accident.

I have to fast- for like 24 hours or something - no water for 12 hours or so pre surgery.
we et to the hospital - its like 430 am - I get admitted- change into a gown or two gowns- and blood is taken - right hand is prepped- for a port for the happy knockout stuff.

and yes- Yes YES I have to pee in a cup.
I mean really what is the point of continuing this saga if I didn’t pee in a cup.

nurses are prep people are legit and very kind.
I walk on a cane into the surgery clinic- and am asked to lay down
one nurse is shaving my leg- and the anesthesiologist is
talking to me- my Dr comes in and is like are you ready-
me 'lets go’
I have to sign- like a phone book of stuff.
Im sure I have just given my first borns rights to any music he makes away.

Im feeling scared - very scared of being knocked out.
and dying - dying and suffocating from the mask.

and there is chatty - slick anesthesiologist- hooking me up to happy juice in my arm using the port they made on my wrist.
they are using an ultrasound to do a nerve block on my leg.
Its the left one - I dont think I have mentioned that.

they jab like an 8" needle into my thigh and its not pleasent
but lets go.
Lets Go.

I think Im shouting again- as Im asked 9million questions
todays date
the president
which leg are we operating on.
maybe I can get you to breath this gas from this mask.
Im wrapped in heated blankets that was actually really nice-
a miliion little beeps beeps and im drowsy as fuck.

can you count back form 300 - I got to like 245
and next thing I know Im waking up.

what the fuck happened to me
Im in restraints
and my mouth feels like a racoon took a shit in there then died in it
and is dry like the gobi desert

Im surrounded - by people in white ninja outfits.
my Dr. is saying you did great- Ill call you tomorrow
Im turned over to a team of nurses- who are patting my face- and telling me its ok.

‘what did I do?’

they are giving me a dixie cup of water-
and forcing my jaws to crunch crunch crunch
god only knows what…
me ’ thats not water’
nurse’ shhhhh just drink it’
what ever oxy and nubain concontion Ive been giving
combined with the anesthesia is like some DMT trip.

Im being wheeled back to my room -
my wife is there - and one of the nurses who checked me in -
and did the ECC a few days ago- she is hot- I know we spoke about her
doing crossfit and likeing it .

wife tells me the surgeon said I did great and that Id be a dick for a few hours - Id sleep it off and in a day or two Id be in allot of pain.

so super hot nurse is patting my face- and cooing -
and telling me how nice I am.
me ’ really’
then she brings me a turkey sandwhich and some orange juice
and tells me Im here for a few hours - Im going to have to eat.
Im fucking staving.
but the sandwhich on stale as white bread - makes me choke.
but its as glorious as the nurses ass.

im in coherent - my wife is there - signing another phone book.
nurse comes back-
‘there is my boy- look you ate that sandwhich’
'your so good’
my wife is shooting us both withering looks.
and yes of course Nurse produces a cup
actually several cups and tells me I have to pee in them before I am discharged.

Im awake- a few different nurses visit - and eventually the hot nurse
comes back with her hotter friend.
or maybe Im just stoned as fuck from the shit pumped into me.

hotter brunette friend - is the Physical Therapist- she has some crutches.
and tells me I have to practice.
so she helped me put on my one shoe and sock that fits-
air force ones if anyone cares- black and silver.

then Im being helped up- and I am walking.
then we walk up and down the hall.
with my balls and ass in plain sight.

PT ’ we have to do the stairs"
me 'ok" so we go up and down the stairs.
and back down the hall.
and they are like ok you can go.
so more paperwork- more signatures

a packet instructions-
filled prescriptions from the lobby
and the valet is brining our car around.

Im still incoherent
and some other debutant - seems to be a theme here
is helping me in a wheel chair - which is painful as fuk
as she smashes my knee and leg into every doorway
even in my legal heroin daze it sucks
god bless her.

we drive home and my tongue feels like sand paper with a lighter on it
wife has gatorade and gum in the car - which is awesome
but I pretty much bite my tongue in half

we have stairs- I somehow hobble up stairs.
and after some moaning and pillows being fluffed up
I pass the fuck out.

alcohol I am familiar with- it wears off- even if it takes two days
of still being drunk.
presriptoin opiates wear out in like 1 second .
one minute you are having in coherent dreams
next minutes you are wide WIDE the fuck awake and everything is screaming.

luckily - chemistry is available.

Dr sent me home with 10 Oxycotin
I dont remember which ones but there where big.
5 days worth - one in the morning - one in the evening
then a bunch of percaset.

I wake up and its sucks - feeling like i got hit by a truck
and have a hang over.
and everything hurts.
but Im alive.

how much more do people want to hear-

the hallucinations I had?
how the first day of PT made me cry and fucking hate myself?

that everything was a challenge- from trying to take a shit- to standing up.
I mean seriously- trying to take a shit- with a giant ass leg brace sucks .

again thanks for following this novel-
writing it out - even for some lulz makes it easier to relive.

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