T Nation

I Can't Wait


I was up kinda early this morning for a sunday (6:30) and had some things to pull of an addition job that had just finished up on this house about 40 minutes from where I live. Anyway I woke up, showered, ate ect ect. Got to the job and became very aware I had to go to the bathroom (both).

So after moving around the 300 machine and a few other really heavy things it became more of an issue.The thing is there's no bathroom :frowning: Long story short I'm on my way home, praying I make it, AND NO there was not other spots to pull off other then in the woods. The area I was in, I know well and the nearest bathroom I could have hit was AT MY HOUSE! :frowning: So I'm speading a little bit (btw in case non of you have figured it out by now it wasn't pissing that had me worried). Sure enough this piney pig pulls me over. Younger guy maybe a few years older then me. He says the usual and notices my facial expression, me sweating holding my sides ect ect. He says "MAN ! Is something wrong?" I looked him square in the eyes and said "Officer, I know I was doing 12 over the speed limit (which is exactly what he clocked me at) I was stuck on a job with no bathroom and I'm REALLY trying to make it back to my house. Now I dont' know what you're going to do, but if your going to write me a ticket and I mean this in the most respectful way possible, then please let me know now because I'm also going to get one for deficating and urnating in public. In fact right behind that big mulch pile over in that field is where I'll be." He looked at me like I was out of my mind then I could see him realize I wasn't kidding. He then said "Well shit, pull your car off to the shoulder some more and go right ahead man." No ticket and I'm still wearing the same drawers :wink:


Ha! that's a good one. Sure makes you appreciate a nice shitter with actual lights and heating...

                  tin can


I've actually shit my pant's before in a similar situation but I was stuck in traffic. Hard to explain why hubby is back from work 35 minutes after he left and the guest shower is running.


Nice to have the fuzz running security for you too while you take a shit. Cuz who are passerby's gonna call to complain to??


Nice job bro. I'm glad you didn't waste a perfectly good pair of drawers!


God Bless America!!!

\|/ 3Toes