Your doc does not want you higher? Find another one. Or lean on him until he sees the errors of his ways.
After all you could also get testosterone illegally without his medical counseling so he should be happy that you even listen to his advice.
My testosterone is definitely not low, but with Alpha Male it is probably very, very high (never had it tested), and my mood is so much better now that I will gut anyone that tries to take my black-green little babys away from me.
Seriously, your doc sucks. Get another one. Bribe one. Get Androgel on the black market. Do whatever it takes, but to accept borderline depression for the rest of your life because testosterone is EVIL?
If you accept that, you probably deserve it.
Hint: If you are not even a little bit angry now, your testosterone is too low .