T Nation

How Would You Kill Vegita?

Theres something inside me
Its, it’s coming out
I feel like killing you
Let loose the anger, held back too long
My blood runs cold

Through my anatomy, dwells another being
Rooted in my cortex, a servant to its bidding

Brutality now becomes my appetite
Violence is now a way of life
The sledge my tool to torture
As it pounds down on your forehead

Eyes bulging from their sockets
With every swing of my mallet
I smash your fucking head in, until brains seep in
through the cracks, blood does leak
distorted beauty, catastrophe
Steaming slop, splattered all over me

Lifeless body, slouching dead lecherous abcess, where you once had a head

Avoiding the prophecy of my new found lust
You will never live again, soon your life will end
I’ll see you die at my feet, eternally I smash your face
facial bones collapse as I crack your skull in half

Crushing, cranial, contents

Draining the snot, I rip out the eyes
Squeezing them in my hands nerves are incised
Peeling the flesh off the bottom of my weapon
Involuntarily pulpifying facial regions

Suffer, and then you die

Torture, pulverized

At one with my sixth sense, I feel free
To kill as I please, no one can stop me

Created to kill, the carnage continues
Violently reshaping human facial tissue

That’s how I’d do it. I know it seems strange that I’m nawt using my RapeAxe but I just bought a Rape Hammer…DBCooper has a little bit of everything.

How would you end Vegita?

Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Theres something inside me
Its, it’s coming out

As it pounds down on your forehead

Steaming slop, splattered all over me

At one with my sixth sense, I feel free

[/quote]

What are you REALLY talking about doing to him?

[quote]Seego wrote:
Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<[/quote]

Gathering the Dragon Balls and wishing that he would die and never be able to be brought back to life would be more effective. Just make sure you kill Dende when you’re done for shits and giggles.

[quote]Mettahl wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Theres something inside me
Its, it’s coming out

As it pounds down on your forehead

Steaming slop, splattered all over me

At one with my sixth sense, I feel free

[/quote]

What are you REALLY talking about doing to him?[/quote]

sex

[quote]Haavik wrote:

[quote]Seego wrote:
Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<[/quote]

Gathering the Dragon Balls and wishing that he would die and never be able to be brought back to life would be more effective. Just make sure you kill Dende when you’re done for shits and giggles.[/quote]

You can’t use the Dragon Balls to wish people dead.

[quote]Seego wrote:
Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<[/quote]

Seego who is that in your avi and where can i get one

Gag him to death?

Dunno really

[quote]chimera182 wrote:

[quote]Haavik wrote:

[quote]Seego wrote:
Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<[/quote]

Gathering the Dragon Balls and wishing that he would die and never be able to be brought back to life would be more effective. Just make sure you kill Dende when you’re done for shits and giggles.[/quote]

You can’t use the Dragon Balls to wish people dead.[/quote]

Pfft, that’s a gyp. You can still wish that someone could never be resurrected (again), right?

[quote]Haavik wrote:

[quote]chimera182 wrote:

[quote]Haavik wrote:

[quote]Seego wrote:
Get him to realize the futility of fighting Majin Buu so he self destructs and dies and in an unsuccessful attempt to take Buu out.
Solid plan imo >> <<[/quote]

Gathering the Dragon Balls and wishing that he would die and never be able to be brought back to life would be more effective. Just make sure you kill Dende when you’re done for shits and giggles.[/quote]

You can’t use the Dragon Balls to wish people dead.[/quote]

Pfft, that’s a gyp. You can still wish that someone could never be resurrected (again), right?[/quote]

I don’t remember, they never tried that in the show. If someone dies more than once, or in the afterlife you can’t revive him.

Unless you have namekian balls, then you can revive more than once.

How wouldn’t I kill that pedophiliac monster is more like it. I’d throw his ass into my bombshelter to start and leave him locked down there long enough for the carbon dioxide to build up and leave him incapable of resistance.

Then I’d go down there and rape him, but in a real gentle way that would disorient and confuse him. Perhaps after this I’d use my nunchuks to choke him a little bit and bring about hypoxia, then use the nunchuks to shatter his fibia.

After that I’d slowly carve pieces of his flesh off of his body with my deluxe set of Cutco knives and eat feed them to him under threat of violence. After that I’d go back upstairs and bring a gallon of gasoline and my PA system down there. I’d keep the gas on a table in front of him with no intention of actually using it (that shit’s too expensive out here to waste on a piece of shit like him), but he would never know that, so the specter of the gas just sitting there would be too much for him to handle.

I’d use the PA system to blast the sounds of things like Arabs arguing with each other, the Kingsmen Trio, wildly distorted male orgasms, dripping water, buzzing bees, Hank Williams, incoming artillery fire and laughing children. After that I think I’d slowly pluck his toenails off with my teeth, then lick his face. I have a garden out back with a bunch of habaneros, and these would be his only food. I’d give him water, but only after I’d poured a bunch of salt into it.

Lastly, I’d slit his fucking throat, but very, very slowly. What else did you expect? Oh yeah, and a little ass-to-mouth action for him too, strictly to satisfy my own needs.

[quote]countingbeans wrote:
Gag him to death?

Dunno really[/quote]

Oh shit, Beans is bringin out the Bulge to gag him!

Sick

I would kill polo and then wait for V to kill himself after hearing the news.

Nah…I could never kill polo.

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:

[quote]Mettahl wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Theres something inside me
Its, it’s coming out

As it pounds down on your forehead

Steaming slop, splattered all over me

At one with my sixth sense, I feel free

[/quote]

What are you REALLY talking about doing to him?[/quote]

sex
[/quote]

Sounded to me like you were going to tie him up and jack off on his forehead. Which would be hilarious, by the way.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:
How wouldn’t I kill that pedophiliac monster is more like it. I’d throw his ass into my bombshelter to start and leave him locked down there long enough for the carbon dioxide to build up and leave him incapable of resistance.

Then I’d go down there and rape him, but in a real gentle way that would disorient and confuse him. Perhaps after this I’d use my nunchuks to choke him a little bit and bring about hypoxia, then use the nunchuks to shatter his fibia.

After that I’d slowly carve pieces of his flesh off of his body with my deluxe set of Cutco knives and eat feed them to him under threat of violence. After that I’d go back upstairs and bring a gallon of gasoline and my PA system down there. I’d keep the gas on a table in front of him with no intention of actually using it (that shit’s too expensive out here to waste on a piece of shit like him), but he would never know that, so the specter of the gas just sitting there would be too much for him to handle.

I’d use the PA system to blast the sounds of things like Arabs arguing with each other, the Kingsmen Trio, wildly distorted male orgasms, dripping water, buzzing bees, Hank Williams, incoming artillery fire and laughing children. After that I think I’d slowly pluck his toenails off with my teeth, then lick his face. I have a garden out back with a bunch of habaneros, and these would be his only food. I’d give him water, but only after I’d poured a bunch of salt into it.

Lastly, I’d slit his fucking throat, but very, very slowly. What else did you expect? Oh yeah, and a little ass-to-mouth action for him too, strictly to satisfy my own needs.[/quote]

Its a party now, Vegita!!

DB is here to play.

[quote]Mettahl wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:

[quote]Mettahl wrote:

[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
Theres something inside me
Its, it’s coming out

As it pounds down on your forehead

Steaming slop, splattered all over me

At one with my sixth sense, I feel free

[/quote]

What are you REALLY talking about doing to him?[/quote]

sex
[/quote]

Sounded to me like you were going to tie him up and jack off on his forehead. Which would be hilarious, by the way.[/quote]

The Vegita Bukkake!!!

I say we make V the “middle man” of a human centipede.

It won’t kill him, at least, not at first.

And just what is a human centipede you might ask? Well, I’ll let the good folks over at ED explain it to yas.

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Human_centipede

I am going to cut off his head…see if that works.

[quote]DBCooper wrote:

Lastly, I’d slit his fucking throat, but very, very slowly. What else did you expect? Oh yeah, and a little ass-to-mouth action for him too, strictly to satisfy my own needs.[/quote]

Not to get all technical geek like, but when you do the atm, is that from the standard entry, outside of the body inward, or are you going inside out from the flesh wounds?

I imagine that Vegita has a very delicious septum and I’d love to nibble on this for a while, until I become fully erect, whereupon I would lightly slap him with my engorged cock. This most likely would result in him becoming aroused as well, at which point I would take advantage of the situation and use my RapeHammer ($29.95) to smash his shaft.

Furthermore, I would relish the opportunity to remove the rack tom from my drum kit and replace it with his face. I imagine that, with a bit of creativity and the right tools, I could string that daffy bastard across the kit and use his asshole as a ride cymbal stand, his face as one of the toms, and perhaps his hands and feet as further percussive accompaniment. This worked well for me with Neal Peart’s bloated body and now what’s left of him is stuffed into my bass drum.

Eventually I would tire of this and be forced to dismount Vegita from my drum kit. When this happens, I suppose I could string some steel cable through his sternocleidomastoid and use him as a sort of real, live weight for my seated row machine. It is a very real possibility that, despite the requisite loss of blood from all of this, Vegita will still weigh too much for me to perform more than a couple sets of low-rep seated rows, so I’ll have to remove some weight. A possible method would be to remove whatever internal organs are not necessary, along with one of his legs, which are sure to be gangrenous by this point anyways. I’m not great with a sewing needle, but I have an acetylene torch/tank that I could use to braze his surgical wounds shut. After all, I wouldn’t want to risk ruining the fun too early by accidentally causing his intestines to spill out while I’m doing rows thanks to a sloppy stitch job. I have a feeling I’d really enjoy the sight of that stupid fucker getting yanked up and down like a fucking marionette by the pulley system on my row machine while I concentrate on scapular retraction.

The sewing thing gives me good idea, though. After practicing for a while on Vegita, I could run some low-voltage wire from my doorbell to Vegita and use the wire as stitching for whatever wounds I happen to open up in his mouth. I could even run the wires between his teeth, like dental floss. His mouth will be crammed with 16ga. 24v wire so that everytime someone rings the doorbell, it just lights that fucker’s mouth up with enough electricity to elicit some sort of vocal response (provided that I’ve resisted the temptation to chew his voice box out of his neck up to this point). The doorbell alarm will essentially be his beta-male screams of agony. I love it!

I’ve always been fascinated by the hunting of men, and although at this point there will be no way whatsoever that I can risk letting Vegita out of my house, I live in a home large enough to give him plenty of hiding spaces while I roam the place with my stungun. I’m sure that hunting him in this manner would grow old quickly, and I doubt he’ll provide much of a chase, let alone be able to muster much resistance to my stungun, even if I detune it a little bit (which I don’t even know how to do). After growing bored with hunting him myself, I’ll invite my friends over to do the same, then afterwards we’ll play a version of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey that I made up myself called, How-many-cocks-can-we-fit -into-Vegita’s-gaping-wide-asshole-at-once. After this I’ll rent him to the esteemed Count Rockula at a discounted price, as long as he returns him in a couple of days with a heart rate of no less than 5 beats per minute.