How to Leave a Bad 'Hobby'?

Hi exemple to smoke or drinking ? somethime i think to just stop to go outside for a while, i don’t know when u learn bad routine u are like in a kind of spiral that is difficult to go out of that, or something really bad happen and make u out but a lot of time u stay in this bad “spiral” i try to learn about myself and how i can leave this shit, bc i lose time and fuck my health, so maybe some peoples who have the same reflexion before can give some advice

peace

what type of addiction/bad habit/“hobby” are we talking about?

Are these hobbies tied to certain people or locations? Sometimes it isn’t the hobby itself, but the where, the who, and the why that sucks you in.

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exemple to drink a lot, i just drink in the weeknd but is enough for fuck my wek, the hobbits of drunking party, the bad lifestyle like smoke and so on

You have to address the “why” behind the drinking. If it’s to be social then you might need to stop going to those events. If you’re drinking alone then it’s probably to mask some other underlying issue like depression. If that’s the case then you need to treat the depression.

It sounds like your drinking is a response to a stimulus. You have to identify and address the stimulus.

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I know that there’s a bit of a language barrier, but categorization is important.

Hobby: my hobby is fly fishing and related stuff. If I never did it again that would suck but life would go on. Someone that likes to try a couple of craft beers every now and then could say that is their hobby too.

Habit: happens often enough that it’s incorporated into regular activity. Wind down at the end of a day, weekend pass time, etc.

Problem: Bad health effects, loved ones become upset or leave, job suffers or are lost, serious hangovers, blackouts, legal problems.

Addiction: compulsion to use, physical withdrawal if you don’t. Life altering consequences accumulate, can’t live with it, can’t live without.

So, where do you land?

hey is righ, is ok, i don’t know maybe a addiction, the best record was 4 month, when i drink is friday and saturday, never drink alone, don’t feel that i need, but when i go outside, with people, they drink, i just feel that i want drink with them, the problem is i don’t stop so iam carreful, i would like to live a different life of that, and in the same time i need.

i was hyperactif maybe that play in my caractere also, and i know that i need to understand the deep reason of why, it is like my “big fight” in this life, to be freedom of that.

it is also like i progress in the gym and when i start to come back in this shit routine i lost, and is all of the time like that, and i know more i control more the thing start to be bigger because maybe i don’t understand how manage that, how to leave that and why i do that

i want to try to learn fighting sport maybe that can make me more peaceful inside

so maybe some peoples have a close experience with addiction and they can have good advice

I’m an alcoholic/addict but have been sober for 17 years.

So, if I’m hearing you right you had 4 months no drinking.

But when you go out and are around people you want to drink with them. When you do it gets out of control, bad for your health, and the harder you try to control your drinking, the worse it gets.

Is that right?

Hello; sorry i take a long time to answer, i living in a new city, a lot of things…

Yes is right… Is harder for me to control how much i drink when i start to drink, iam like a fire who continue to grow untill he die.
When i was young i was “shy” maybe i start to drink for that, i got some fear from peoples in general, even if i can talk with them, i stay “close” inside.

But after i start to like drink, but not for the same reason, i start to feel the failure, to break the brain, i try some others stuff but nothing was like alcohol for me.
I don’t have so much fun when iam in some party, it is ridiculus i know, just im feel bored, iam not more clever than peoples, i just don’t laugh with them so often so alcohol was also a way to go out of myself, not because i don’t accept myself.

i take a bad routine when i was young, because all of my relationship with girl start by drinking alcohol, of course i get some relationship without that, and they was the best, but drinking was always close to me, even if i “control” and drink in the weeknd, somethime that was often but never a long time.

I just know that i like that, so i can’t continu to drink because i really like that, somethime in party, my pleasure is not to fuck, to talk and so on, but to feel this sensation of to be drunk, that make me in a sense peaceful, the feeling that for a time i stop to exist, even if iam not particular sad, i like this feeling to stop to think and exist for a while

sorry that my english is not so good, tell me if u understand, if u don’t i will take my time for make something more clear

That’s a very good description and easy to understand

It does sound like you could use some help with this. Unfortunately one can only do so much online.

Do you think you’re ready to speak with others face to face or in a group?

i don’t know, i believe that iam the only who can change something, and talk in a group will not help me, and i also believe that can help…
i need to find the rooth of all this things, even if i stop to drink i don’t know if i will resolve the things, if i will find the roots of “why”

i will try again by myself, and if i can’t i will search some “help”, u didn’t drink for a long… time did u miss that ? i hope after some year i will not thinking about that, this feeling, when i didn’t drink for month i was good but somethime i miss the taste of failure

I did for a while. Now, not at all. It’s almost funny to think about how much a part of my life it used to be, but how removed from it I am now.

It’s never too far away though. If ai ever want another beer, my neighbor own the bar right down the road.

yes when we want to drink, it is always easy to find a way for, i never drinking alone, but find the good person for ^^’ it was my “rules” but who know how long time can stand a wall…

Yeah. That isolation drives people either back to the bar or to find other people and things to do.

It sounds like you are predisposed to alcoholism. If you can’t control it then you are probably better off just avoiding alcohol altogether.

yes i think the same, or smoke some weed somethime is “better” i can still control myself, my familly was addict, i hate that a long time, start really late and still dont like, and it is ironic because now it is different

“That’s the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen "

always find a reason, iam just lucky to not fall complety inside, to have the reason, but even is not easy, i have bad experience and crazy but still i fall again, break fall break fall, my life is a slackline, my fear it is not to die because of this shit, but to make bad things to peoples, because when u drinking so much, not for all maybe, but for me, that can make me like " doctor jekyll"

Yeah, me too. My wife and son have never seen that part of me.

so i know that u understand me, really is good that u leave this shit, maybe some peoples can die peaceful with that, they are not crazy, but maybe some of them inside i already " crazy " so when they drink…

It’s in there. The persistence of the idea “Hey, maybe I can have one…” is incredible.

It’s really just a daily decision to not do that, which has become easier over time. But there is still a good deal of inner turmoil, which had also calmed a lot as I’ve worked on it over the years.

As long as I maintain that I am the source of my own discontent I’ll have something to work on, but the moment I forget it my work on that subject is done.

And if I’m lucky, I’ll only pick up again.