As someone who is now 36 years old but who has had mood problems since thirteen years old, I believe I can share some serious input. I am not a tough guy or badass by any means, nor am I someone who even acts remotely confrontational. I am not someone who gets off on mistreating people at all. I believe my temper is a result of experience and natural predisposition.
Although I have learned to take more things in stride as I get older, I would say the degree of the temper and physical manifestations of it–that is, what I feel inside, physically and mentally–have gotten worse! This might be hard to understand for some who do not experience it, but I have learned to control the expression of the temper but the actual visceral feelings have gotten worse when it appears.
My temper has actually interfered with the well being of my relationship. I am not an abusive person at all, but to for a woman to be around some with volatile mood swings is no picnic. So basically the fear of a wrecked relationship and now MARRIAGE–and all the great things that have come along with this relationship/marriage disappearing–is enough to keep in check! When I feel that fiery visceral feeling and a racing mind, I try my best to calm down and think of all the serious consequences that can manifest if I continue to have such experiences and possible bad behaviors as a result. I don’t want to lose employment or wreck relationships with people.
This is taking some serious and behavior modification and a total change in my outlook on people and life and acceptance of things. I’ve thought to myself for some time why do I have this problem and how can I solve it. Some think that finding the cause of an emotional problem might not serve much good because, after all, the problem exists and one must fix it. For me, finding the cause, I mean really turning the situation over in my mind and finding out what has caused it has helped me immensely.