T Nation

Home Depot 10 Man Battle


#1

Got this from deadspin.com, thought it'd be fun to discuss here.

"You are chosen to compete against 9 other people. All ten of you are locked in a standard Home Depot. The place is dark except emergency lights above exits. The goal is to kill one another to become last man standing. Last person alive gets to leave.

You are allowed to choose 3 pieces of equipment to aid you. Anything with a bar-code counts as one piece of equipment. For example, if you choose a nail gun, then a container of nails will be needed, so that would equal two pieces of equipment. You can use only the equipment you choose, no scalping from dead guys.

What three weapons would you choose and what would be your strategy?"


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#2
  1. Large spool of rope/line/wire (it'd depend on the strength and pliability). Would be good to make snares, trip wires, "clothes lines etc."

  2. A very sharp knife. It'd be pretty easy to sneak up on people and bam. game over.

  3. An axe. Would more than likely remove the blade and use it like bat... but the blade could be usefull still.


#3

A sledgehammer, one of the mini forklifts hopefully with lights, and a garbage can lid for a shield.


#4

Ill take a toilet bowl, some beef jerkey from the register, and a garden hoe.

climb to the top of the tallest shelf, camp out eating jerkey and dropping dueces until everyone else is dead. Then ill throw some shit at the last guy and jump down and hack him up with the hoe while he's still confused/tired.


#5

You disgust me!!!

no toilet paper??? You animal.....


#6

1: Knife
2: Baseball bat
3: Night-vision googles


#7

http://www.homedepot.com/

For your research.

Greg I like your style.


#8

what home depot are you shopping at?


#9

Lol


#10

Coast PX45 Focusing LED Flashlight - it comes with batteries, and can be adjusted from flood to beam/ anything in between.

Real-Kill 20.5 oz. Wasp and Hornet Killer - 25 ft spray, a long distance weapon intended for blinding.

Estwing Sportsman's Axe with 10 in. Leather Grip Handle - highest quality axe they have, and not too long to use as a weapon.

I also considered a combination of like a propane tank, lighter, and fire safe large enough to hide in. Kinda thought that idea was fun, but I had concerns about: a) getting out of the safe afterwards, and b) the fire safe not holding up long enough. Most seem to be rated for like an hour, and the parameters you mentioned weren't specific enough to tell me whether this is a viable strategy.


#11

Gregron, I was going to say almost the same thing ...

I'd use the ax and the spool of wire for the snare/trip wire ... but instead of the knife I'd take a box of nails and scatter them on the floor to slow down/incapacitate my foes

I also like the idea of a shield, but I'll stick with my ax, nails, and wire


#12

I'd use plastic carrier bags and use them for stealth attacks, putting them over the victims head to suffocate/disorientate before killing in another way. These are free so don't count towards the three items (cheating or ingenious?)

1 - small knife for close combat/random slashing like crazed mad man.

2 - 1 trillion candle power torch to blind people in the dark. Before using above knife.

3 - Axe or some blunt weapon. You could use this to smash kneecaps and let the person lay there screaming, luring other people towards the downed person. Bam stealth attack.

I'd be like those sneaky velociraptors in Jurassic Park.


#13

Come on! The guy's ex-SF. He should be DQ'd. Limit him to only stuff found in a Home Depot cash register and he'd still kill us all (probably with a piece of receipt paper).


#14

is that when you turn off all the lights in your house, turn on your computer and google stuff?


#15

Okay, you say anything with a barcode.

Does this mean anything with a barcode attached to the equipment?

Can you utilize whatever the employees have in the break room?

How about the bathroom plumbing?

Would this include lumber? (Last I checked, no barcodes, but then again I buy my lumber from the local lumber store.)

I think the first thing I would do is find out where the maintenance room and start scavanging equipment (no barcodes, right?)


#16

revision: would trade in my previously listed axe for this:

Woodman's Pal 10-1/2 In. x1/8 In. Carbon Steel Blade, Military Style Handle Machete with Honing Stone Kit


#17

In the same depot where you kill other people in the dark. Anyway the staff would have a baseball bat under the till for robbers and bandits and the night vision goggles would be from the nerdy worker who bought the COD MW2 prestige edition with night vision goggles but he left it there one night....


#18

I think in this scenario stealth would be to your advantage ... any kind of combustion/light emission would give away your position in a dark store and any competitors around you would know a.) where you are and b.) be knowledgeable of your strategy.


#19

5 gallon bucket of flooring adhesive

A trowel, to spread said adhesive along 1 aisle in the store

Forklift (originally thought of the rental pickups, but those aren't kept indoors...) to chase and herd the other 9 down the sticky aisle of doom, and impale every one of them on my forklift.

And before someone says they guys can climb the aisles to avoid the sticky floor...forklift to knock down the shelves!


#20

polo: good point. set up your flashlight in a fixed location, and don't be in that location. problem solved!