T Nation

HOA Horror Stories and Advice

Okay, so I’m sure at least some of you live in a condo complex and rent or own.

And you have to deal with the fucking HOA and its bullshit, worse yet, is when the homeowners don’t actually control the HOA yet, and the builders run the think.

Well, at auction, I bought a place a few years ago, and it’s been “okay” at best. The weight room has no weights (nice for a little cardio but that’s it), they Executive Board (read builders) don’t keep the pool heated. They basically ignore state and federal HOA laws, and “pass” unwritten policies all the time, for which they levy fines.

While, last Thursday while I was at work was the straw that broke the camel’s back:

The Property Manager had my 78 Mustang Cobra (yeah, I know… I’m trying to sell it) towed and impounded while I was at work. No warming, in violation of no written policy: it had two low (read nearly flat) tires. On the form with the towing company, she falsely asserted that vehicle had been abandoned for six months!

I ask for her to explain what policy I violated, and show me where it’s written. Nothing. Refuses to get me my car back. So I’m taking the next step, and pressing charges for a stolen vehicle, I’m also contacting the state AG for the rampant disregard for the law at this place, HOA meetings are a joke, the management company makes up rules, and imposes arbitrary fines. About a month ago some stuff went missing in a common room and the property manager insisted that she had the right to search every unit on the premises to find it.

She’s either willfully ignorant of the law, or is being given really bad advice by her “boss” (yes, the HOA should technically be her boss, but she don’t care).

Keep in mind, I don’t rent this unit, I own it. I don’t even have a mortgage or a lean on it, it’s mine.

Anyone else have experience dealing with this bull-SHIT? Any advice, or stories of your own.

What does horrer mean?

Its funny you bring this up. I just heard a report on NPR where a family was two payments behind to their HOA because hubby who pays the bills was in IRAQ. HOA foreclosed and sold the house at auction. The 4 bedroom house was completely paid off.

I suggest you get a copy of whatever you signed or find yourself with a real nasty surprise.

The lawyers reccomendation should you get on the wrong side of a powerful HOA; Call them before the sheriff comes to evict you and cry and beg like a little baby.

Im not saying your HOA has that power but maybe you should look into this, perhaps with some legal help.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128078864&ft=1&f=1001

It’s truly amazing the kind of sway they have. Not so much because it’s legal, but because anytime you want to challenge the legality of anything they do, you literally have to file a civil suit: the cops won’t touch it.

I’m trying to file a police report about my stolen vehicle, as soon as I tell them it was a property manager, they run away.

It’s like: the car was in my parking spot, I own it. Not renting, no mortgage. It is mine!

The real problem, is it’s not the HOA running things, it’s the builders of the project who still control most of the voting seats, and so they just skip the procedures (required by law) and do whatever.

I’m filing a complaint with my State’s Attorney General, I have well documented their violations. That won’t help me with my car, but it will make me feel better… feel better about living her till I can sell my fucking unit.

I will never buy land or a unit anywhere with a HOA again. Talk about signing up to be fucked in the ass.

[quote]SickAbs wrote:
What does horrer mean?[/quote]

It’s like horror but spelled wrong.

According to wikipedia, “The Horn of Africa is almost equidistant from the equator and the Tropic of Cancer.”

That does sound pretty horrible.

HOAs are a horrible idea, and even worse in reality.

Why would anybody voluntarily participate in a community where someone else has the ability to tell you how to live?

Still wondering what exactly an HOA is… I mean, I used my context clues but they only help so much. It sounds like a landlord but… not? Home Owner’s Association maybe?

[quote]CapnYousef wrote:
Still wondering what exactly an HOA is… I mean, I used my context clues but they only help so much. It sounds like a landlord but… not? Home Owner’s Association maybe?[/quote]

yep. And its either builders who run it, or retired people who have nothing else to do but walk around the neighborhood and say that those garbage cans can’t be out more then 30 minutes after pickup, even though people are at work. Or you can’t have an unregistered car in your driveway, and you HAVE to have atleast one tree in your yard, etc…

Oh wow, its like in certain TV shows I’ve forgotten - the dickbags who walk around to remind you “YOUR GRASS IS OVER AN INCH AND THREE QUARTERS WHAT THE SHIT MAN GET IT TOGETHER”

[quote]Eli B wrote:
Its funny you bring this up. I just heard a report on NPR where a family was two payments behind to their HOA because hubby who pays the bills was in IRAQ. HOA foreclosed and sold the house at auction. The 4 bedroom house was completely paid off.

I suggest you get a copy of whatever you signed or find yourself with a real nasty surprise.

The lawyers reccomendation should you get on the wrong side of a powerful HOA; Call them before the sheriff comes to evict you and cry and beg like a little baby.

Im not saying your HOA has that power but maybe you should look into this, perhaps with some legal help.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128078864&ft=1&f=1001[/quote]

Truly outrageous.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128078864&ft=1&f=1001

Damn. I can’t even comprehend the composure required to not hunt down and kill everybody even remotely associated with a maneuver like that.

That is the most unscrupulous abuse of a position I’ve ever heard of regarding HOAs.

my HOA was whining that I was using too much water. Even though I paid all the fees. Also, my bikes can’t be stored on the balcony.

No lie son, no lie.

Just recently bought a condo. Closed in May and moved in last week. On day 1 of me moving in my downstairs neighbor comes up to me. This is how our interaction went:

Me: Hi! I’m Nate. I just moved in and I’m the new neighbor. Nice to meet you!
Her: Hi, I’m _____. Did you know you are in violation of the CCRs of the HOA by having hardwood floors? We’ve already talked to our legal counsel and a complaint has been filed…

This is within FIVE SECONDS of me meeting this person. I wanted to kick her down the fucking stairs.

Anyway, the matter has not been resolved yet. And no, I didn’t read all fucking 250 pages of the CCRs. I am thinking about getting a doctor’s note claiming that I have severe allergies and having carpet would not allow me to function as a normal human being. I have a couple lawyer friends who might throw me a few bones of legal advice. We’ll start there, and see what the fuck happens. I could potentially have to rip out the hardwood floors and replace it with carpet. This could cost me upwards of $4,000. I’ve never been fucked out of $4,000 and there’s absolutely no telling how I will react. I don’t expect it to be pleasant.

The lady below me is in her 50s. She’s single. She has dogs. And she’s a wretched old bitch. I’ve tried my best to be nice to her, but it seems as if her sole purpose in life is to fucking police my actions.

The sad thing about all this is that I absolutely love my condo. The layout, the size, the location, the pricing - it’s all so perfect. And then day 1 I realize I’ve got an abhorrent cunt living below me.

I took a risk on neighbors (my #1 fear)… and got fucked. It doesn’t help that this banshee below me used to be the president of the HOA and is now on the board.

I originally had no intention of buying a condo, but the pricing in California is just so expensive its too hard to buy a house in a decent location. So I went with a condo. The HOAs were low, the community seemed well kept, the location was perfect, and the place was great…

My advice to anybody looking to purchase property: Don’t buy a condo. If you can’t afford a house and are priced out of the market, then don’t buy. I don’t care how low interest rates are, or how cheap the real estate is.

I don’t own shit here. The only thing I own is the right of first refusal. I could go on but I’m just gonna get fucking frustrated and pissed off… don’t buy a fucking condo.

For anyone thinking of buying into a development with an HOA, you can request the minutes from the meetings of the HOA for a few months back so you can see how picky they are. That way you can decide if they are just too draconian for you before you put your money down.

[quote]Spartiates wrote:

[quote]SickAbs wrote:
What does horrer mean?[/quote]

It’s like horror but spelled wrong.[/quote]

lol just bustin stones.

As for your HOA they sound like a bunch of power hungry douches. How long had your car been there before they towed it? I would be flipping shit.

So, are buyers informed of the fact that their property is under the control of an HOA by the Realtor, or is their some disclosure that states this before you purchase?

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
So, are buyers informed of the fact that their property is under the control of an HOA by the Realtor, or is their some disclosure that states this before you purchase?

[/quote]

It would be disclosed, I would think. PMPM probably would have a better answer.

[quote]Eric 2.0 wrote:
According to wikipedia, “The Horn of Africa is almost equidistant from the equator and the Tropic of Cancer.”

That does sound pretty horrible. [/quote]

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
HOAs are a horrible idea, and even worse in reality.

Why would anybody voluntarily participate in a community where someone else has the ability to tell you how to live?
[/quote]

You can’t always build a house on some secluded personal property. HOA’s suck and as one of the other posters wrote, seem to be filled with retirees with nothing better to do but point out what they don’t like about you. All of this is new to me too. I got fined when living in a townhouse for having an air-conditioning unit in my window.

I didn’t even know someone could dictate what you put in your own windows. So, instead of quit using it, i began taking it down in the morning and putting it back in the window late at night when I got home. This just pissed them off more…and proved they were driving by my house at night.