Hemorrhoids

[quote]Fuzzyapple wrote:
countingbeans wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:
HolyMacaroni wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:

Holding your breath and trying to poop on every exercise? Even the leg abductor and adductor.

If you have weak abdominal muscles and hold your breath there is a lot of internal pressure put on your organs and want to be pushed outwards. You intestines can even end up in your ball sack and out your ass hole.

i honestly can’t tell if you guys are joking or not

Actually I’m being serious :expressionless: <---- look at my face, does that look serious to you?

JK I’m not serious but yes it’s a infection of your anus. I described a hernia to scare you.

woah, one of us assholes needs to look this up on the internets, because I always thought your “joking” response was what it really was. It’s an infection?

Well it can be if it breaks open and fecal matter gets into it?[/quote]

Fuck that made me gag. Why did I have to buy chocolate protein this month?

[quote]countingbeans wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:
countingbeans wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:
HolyMacaroni wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:

Holding your breath and trying to poop on every exercise? Even the leg abductor and adductor.

If you have weak abdominal muscles and hold your breath there is a lot of internal pressure put on your organs and want to be pushed outwards. You intestines can even end up in your ball sack and out your ass hole.

i honestly can’t tell if you guys are joking or not

Actually I’m being serious :expressionless: <---- look at my face, does that look serious to you?

JK I’m not serious but yes it’s a infection of your anus. I described a hernia to scare you.

woah, one of us assholes needs to look this up on the internets, because I always thought your “joking” response was what it really was. It’s an infection?

Well it can be if it breaks open and fecal matter gets into it?

Fuck that made me gag. Why did I have to buy chocolate protein this month?[/quote]

Is it more fucked up that I’m drinking chocolate flavoured protein looking at hemorrhoid pictures right before my workout?

[quote]HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?[/quote]

I’d even go as far as washing my ass after wiping. Just saying.

[quote]Fuzzyapple wrote:
Kerley wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:
HolyMacaroni wrote:
Fuzzyapple wrote:

Holding your breath and trying to poop on every exercise? Even the leg abductor and adductor.

If you have weak abdominal muscles and hold your breath there is a lot of internal pressure put on your organs and want to be pushed outwards. You intestines can even end up in your ball sack and out your ass hole.

i honestly can’t tell if you guys are joking or not

Actually I’m being serious :expressionless: <---- look at my face, does that look serious to you?

JK I’m not serious but yes it’s a infection of your anus.

i call bullshit on that face!

At least my ass hole loves me! Excuse me while I go shave it and stoke it as I call it brownie ;)[/quote]
bastard :frowning:

[quote]thorax wrote:
HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?

I’d even go as far as washing my ass after wiping. Just saying.

[/quote]

washing after you go is one of the best things to do if you already have them. i’d assume its a good preventitive aswell.

[quote]HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?[/quote]

don’t get pregnant
don’t fist your asshole…actually don’t put anything up your ass…ever, unless you are a girl or a homosexual male, then accept peni’s and the occasional tongue if your partner is down for that

[quote]Vicomte wrote:
Don’t check the wikipedia. They include a picture.

[/quote]

I looked:(

[quote]HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?[/quote]

lol. so which of these did you learn today?

[quote]ddinante wrote:
Vicomte wrote:
Don’t check the wikipedia. They include a picture.

I looked:)[/quote]

FTFY

[quote]kylec72 wrote:
HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?

lol. so which of these did you learn today?[/quote]

i mean, i guess i kinda did all of them to an extent. i guess i’m just going to pay more attention from now on

serious lols in here

If you have a hemroid/s that are flaring up, for the love of god, DO NOT use a bunch of toilet paper. It will make them burn and itch 3 times worse. I know it sounds like another pain in the ass but if you can hold off until you get home to shit, do not use TP and just take a shower afterwards (mark my words) your ass will love you for it.

[quote]Vicomte wrote:
Don’t check the wikipedia. They include a picture.

[/quote]

hahahahahahha. I totally went and checked just because you said that. Thank you!

[quote]ddinante wrote:
Vicomte wrote:
Don’t check the wikipedia. They include a picture.

I looked:([/quote]

Me too FML

i didnt have to look up wiki i just stick my head between my legs and get a birds eye view :slight_smile:

Yeah the wiki has a fantastic pic. Ill try to get one of my own but its so fucking hard to spread my ass cheeks, bend over AND take a picture. Usually its my BF that does that.

But for real, it fucking sucks and I know some of you bastards have had 1 or them. Hemmy’s FTL!!!

I don’t know if I actually have hemorrhoids, but if I don’t wipe well, or get SWAS, my ass gets really, really, really itchy. Almost like an uncomfortable burn/itch.

Maybe I should get that checked out…

…and LOL! Hairy hemorrhoid ass at Wiki. Brilliant shit.

[quote]HolyMacaroni wrote:
ok so far i’ve got:

don’t strain when i poop

eat fiber

don’t try to poop when squatting

wipe my ass

am i missing anything?[/quote]

For some reason this fucking cracks me up.

Truck drivers get them a lot due to sitting for LONG LONG periods of time…so add don’t be a truck driver to the list.

prep H cooling gel is the bomb!

[quote]paul496 wrote:
serious lols in here[/quote]

I hear that. X2