T Nation

Help with a Newbie

I have a friend of mine who decided that he wants to start training hard. He would like to try out for the baseball team here at the University. So he begs me to let him train with me… I’m reluctant at first- but decide that it is most honorable to be a good friend and to put him on the path of actually learning what good training is about.

well first off, I hit the gym 2x a day. So I know he wasn’t going to do that. I told him to come for the evening session.

No Biggie.

Well, he’s still in his Muscle & Faggotry stage. I never went through that cause my dad always believed in the Big 3, and even when I didn’t lift weights I had done gymnastics.

So he’s asking me why I don’t do isolation exercises. And that he thinks full body workouts are silly. He doesn’t “Feel” it after a workout.
He thinks that we should lift 6 days a week. No days off.

(Side note, I made him ‘feel’ it last wednesday. We did Tabata Thrusters, rest for 1 minute, Tabata Front Squats, Rest 1 minute, tabata weighted burpees, Rest 1 Minute, Tabata Jumping jacks… He puked 8 times (I brought a trash bag hehe) and still was sore till this monday evening… somehow he still doesn’t believe in my training methods…though he used the bar and I used 95#'s)

He complains about pretty much everything. It may be partly because I’m a bit smaller than he is… Even though it’s obvious how much stronger I am. I can double most of his lifts, and can triple his front squat.

He really thinks that muscle and faggotry is the way to go with everything.

I explain to him that the body works as one unit, train it that way.

I explain to him that athletes train movements- not muscles.

I explain to him that you can’t lift heavy all the time- sometimes you need to lift light but with speed.

I explain to him that your posterior chain is where most athletes lack strength and is an area that can always be improved.

I explained to him that you take days off for a reason. Your body needs to rest as hard as it trains. (Especially with 2 a days)

I explained sarcoplasmic hypertrophy for cryin out loud. (IE, taking 5lb dumbbells and doing 1083084982167429.00 X 10^32 curls is just going to make you sore, not buff)

You can get bigger arms through the ‘big’ movements, not neccessarily just curls and kickbacks. (though even they have their place)

I explain to him everything that I can.

He doesn’t want to listen!

In addition to that he apparently doesn’t know that he’s the obnoxious guy I’d like to kill in the gym. The guy that thinks he needs to take a warmup lap around the gym to let everyone know he’s working out. The skinny dude wearing underarmour. He screams and grunts when it’s only a warmup set. When I say “take a break, 1 minute”… he walks off and goes to chit chat with someone from class.

Do I keep training him and put up with the bullshit, just be a good friend. Or do I ditch him???

It’s not really affecting my evening workouts, I use that as a time to kickback a bit easier anyway.

How should I deal with him???

I’d say to him, “lookit, we’re good friends, but when you train with me, you train the way I train and you don’t ask questions. If you don’t think the way I train works, then you don’t have to train with me. No hard feelings.”

If that doesn’t work then take him on a road trip to Columbus, Ohio - Westside Barbell Club. The second he asks about doing barbell curls, they’ll pound his ass into the ground and he’ll never ask again.


thats really not a bad plan.

I would institute the “shut the fuck up” rule.

The “shut the fuck up rule” is as follows.

  1. Do you squat more than me?
  2. Do you bench more than me?
  3. Do you deadlift more than me?

No? Then shut the fuck up and do what I say.

I institute the “shut the fuck up” rule with many things, including where we set the racking pins on the squat rack. I’m 5’8" so I set them kind of low, but unless you’re squatting more than me, shut the fuck up, and I don’t give a flying fuck if you are 6’9".

RIT Jared

This is a little off topic, but I live in Columbus and have always wondered, if I wandered into Westside Barbell what would they do?

Westside Visitor Welcome

HAHA thanks guys, I"ll try your approaches!

I’m with RIT Jared.

Use the “shut the Fuck up” plan.

Or just break his stupid ass reality…“why the fuck did you ask me to help your ass anyway? Cuz I fucking KNOW something. If you don’t believe in me…go ahead and jack off to (as you so eloquently put it Xen Nova) Muscle and Faggotry…I got REAL working out to do…”

Do as I fucking say or get the fuck out of my way. Simple. Fast. Effective. Period.

Tough love…it’s sometimes the only way to go, man.

my 2 cents.


I’s concur with what has been said. It’s not easy to take on a training partner. I had a co-worker that was excellent. We differed in our approach to what works but in the gym our attitudes were similar. We’ll talk to you as we walk in or out but not during.

I would put your “friend” in his place. The “shut the…” is 100% appropriate. His retort MIGHT be that he’s bigger. If so and this becomes into some pissing contest, wipe your feet and walk away. He sounds like an idiot and you’re not getting paid to deal with idiots.

actually, if he does say that he’s bigger then i’ll bust out the gloves and beat his ass…

I box (and wrestle)… he plays baseball.

Now that’s functional

lol…just like the article this week by
Dr. Lonnie Lowery.

Dude, sounds like this dude would not put on gloves…

If he is SO arrogant not to trust the person who HE asked for help, there is a limit to what you can do to help him. Period.

Whatever you do, don’t sacrifice your time for someone who isn’t willing to sacrifice THEIR time for you. Life lesson.

Keep us up to date, man. I’m curious on how this will wind up.