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Help: 18 Almost 19 and Never had a Girlfriend or Even Kissed a Girl


#1

What tips do you guys have for this? I have obviously had chances but am just particular I guess.


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#2

I don’t think you’re asking the right question.

If you’ve never kissed a girl, but have had chances to, then (tautologically) you’ve never kissed a girl because you’ve chosen to not kiss girls.

Have you considered maybe you’re gay?


#3

fair point… definently not though because guys disgust me haha


#4

maybe not setting your standards so high would help.


#5

@rangersfan30 there is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all! If ladies knew this about you they would think highly of your decision not to go after just anyone. As for the kiss… when you find a girl you want to kiss go for it and don’t overthink or it will get awkward. Find a girl that likes to take control and enjoy the fireworks :boom:


#6

err… in other thread you said you had 8s and 9s rubbing up against you all the time, desperate for your attention :laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing:


#7

I would say take one of these chances, get the kiss out of the way then after taking some time to reflect on the kiss, go chasing the big D you truly crave.


#8

Get off the internet.


#9

Find yourself a practice girl.


#10

You’re weird.

Just kiss someone; it’s no big deal.


#11

I have been in your shoes. I was shy and a little intimidated by girls at your age. I considered any conversation with a girl that went longer than two sentences a success, and I did not have my first kiss until shortly after my 21st birthday.

From that point on, I had two extended relationships and a smattering of casual ones before meeting my wife at 27.

You’ll be fine.

One approach is the Yogi: just chill out, hit on everything that moves and eventually it will just happen.

With respect to Yogi, I think his success in pulling hot wimmenz over the course of his life may make that sound easier to him than it probably does to you. For sure, I would have heard that at your age and said “ok, but how do I actually get a girl to talk to me?”

The first thing I’d recommend is chilling the fuck out. Starting multiple internet threads first asking if a specific girl is hot and then following that days later with “how do I kiss a girl” indicated that you’re wayyyyyyy up in your own head about this.

The second thing I’d recommend is to have standards, but open yourself up a little bit. If you’re waiting for a high level fitness model to pop your cherry, you may be waiting awhile. There are plenty of very nice and very attractive girls out there that AREN’T Cassandra Martin. If fit girls are your type, that’s great - mine too. I met my wife at a hot yoga class. I met the last girl I dated before my wife in a running club. I met the girl I dated for much of my 20’s through a friend and took her rock climbing on our first date.

Which brings me to my third, most useful suggestion: assuming that you have your shit together (don’t dress like a total slob; keep yourself in decent shape; have a few interests), you should approach girls with some confidence and ask them, simply, if they want to get a cup of coffee between classes or something like that. Make the first plan low key, in a public place, you’re just getting to know one another. Some will say no, and that’s fine - they owe you absolutely nothing. Some will say “sure, when?”

When that happens: take some of the pressure off by remembering that SHE ALSO (MAY BE) ATTRACTED TO YOU.

I missed opportunities throughout college when I was so worried about myself and whether she was interested; it honestly never occurred to me that maybe the girl sitting across from me was also attracted to me, and possibly nervous herself! I would get coffee or have lunch with a girl and miss obvious signs of flirtation (or an invitation to take things further, like a real “date” beyond my rental home in the friend zone) because of that.

So. Find attractive girl leaving gym/class. Ask if she wants to get coffee. If yes, go ahead and do so. Chill out beforehand, it’s just coffee. When you meet her, actually ask questions and get to know her; if you start talking too much about yourself, you come off as a tool (it’s fine to talk about your passions and interests, just don’t spend 10 straight minutes talking about something she clearly has no interest in; find some common ground and stick to that). If coffee goes well, come prepared with a follow-up plan (“do you want to go to the basketball game on Saturday?” or something like that). Repeat as needed.

**story time: in my early 20’s my girlfriend and I went to The Melting Pot for our anniversary (1 year maybe). We barely talked during the entire meal because the table next to ours was so entertaining: a first or second date that was NOT going well. The guy was a self-impressed tool that spent stretches of 10 solid minutes talking about himself, the girl was barely saying anything, and it was all we could do not to laugh out loud at how badly the guy was misreading the situation.

Don’t be that guy. Ask the girl questions: where is she from? What’s she studying? Does she like sports? What are her other interests? Has she seen any good movies lately? - and do that because you are genuinely interested (also, those can be good conversation starters to your/her favorite movie ever, favorite sport, and so on), not just because you read that this would get you laid. One thing that’s become a problem in our culture, maybe you’ve heard, is entitled douchebag males thinking that women owe them something. Bullshit. If you take a girl to coffee or dinner, she owes you nothing in return unless you’ve actually made it worth her while.


#12

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#13

What you didn’t make clear, is it a lack of a traction or fear? Are you asking for pick up advice or something else?


#14

Whenever I’m faced with problems in life, I ask myself, “What would Nick Cage do?”. Everything works out fine after that.


#15

This is pretty much exactly my approach! Haha.

One skill I’ve developed is the ability to ask out a chick with zero fear of rejection whatsoever. Takes a little time to develop, but once you realise that it’s not that big of a deal it’s very liberating.


#16

although, there does seem to be something fishy going on here.

In another thread you say you have 8s or 9s rubbing against you, but if you are too particular to kiss these girls, by what standard are you rating them 8s or 9s? Surely if they were as hot as that they would satisfy your particulars?

Personally, I think you’re full of shit and are just starting these threads out of boredom.


#17

You miss 100 percent of the shots you don’t take!


#18

They are obviously 8 and 9s but don’t have dicks


#19

ratings are from other guys at my school


#20

And how do you rate them?