T Nation

Having a D-Bag for a Boss

I was wondering who here has a boss who is a total douche bag? I mean just a prick of a bastard. And if you do, how do you go about dealing with him/her? Please share

My old boss was the biggest asshole I’ve ever met. I used to get physically ill when I would walk into the lobby. He was the epitome of the incompetent asshole lawyer.

He would get a bug up his ass that Theory X applied to Situation 1, even though really, Theory X applied to Situation 2 and NOT Situation 1. He would refuse to believe it, call you lazy/stupid, let it lie, and then bring it up again months later.

He would never read memoranda or anything, and then would get furious and turn red when he screwed up in front of the client.

I had opposing counsel, on more than one occasion, pull me aside after a trial and tell me I don’t deserve to be treated the way he treated me.

He sat in my office one day, ripping me a new one, with a visible erection. My secretary and paralegal witnessed this.

What did I do? The only thing I, and dozens of other associates at that firm could do. I quit.

The asshole boss used to be a partner at my current firm. He had his office door rigged with a switch and a magnet so he could call an associate into the office, hit a button, and have the door slam closed for “discussions.”

My first interview after I decided to leave the old firm was with a woman who used to work with the asshole. She looked at my resume, laughed, and asked, “Oh! Does he still like to make people cry?”

He never made me cry, and I was usually quick enough with a quip or an answer to lighten him up, but it was exhausting.

I can laugh at him now, but that sort of environment destroys you.

I had a boss for a while who had incredible mood swings and was on occasion what I would classify as verbally abusive. What would be the right thing to do on one day would incite his wrath the next, and he would snap from Jekyll to Hyde with little provocation.

He was genuinely likeable in his good moments, though, and I wouldn’t classify him as you described, but it could be an awful experience, and I was terrified at first, frankly. I’m very sensitive to people’s opinions and strong personalities sometimes overwhelm me.

After several months I just had to realize that it was not my fault if I was the object of his tirades, and to determine to use the experience to grow personally in the areas of patience, tact and having a thick skin (which I need).

Some may say that I should have stood up for myself more than I did, but in the long run I don’t regret how I handled the situation. After a while I got up the courage to say something rational and calming in a couple of circumstances when he was getting irrationally upset with clients (which would usually lead to his taking it out on staff).

He later said that he appreciated my patience with him, and that he was rebuked by the objectivity and patience with which I handled the situations. I took it as a very nice compliment, because, like I said, I’m pretty timid, and I really did like him despite his failures.

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
…that sort of environment destroys you.[/quote]

Or it makes you become like them – which is almost the same thing isn’t it?

Better to quit and get out alive.

Worst boss I ever had was when I worked at Walgreens. Most of the employees there were women and over 80% of management were women. Now I’m not saying that women can’t do this and that and don’t belong in the work place but these women surely didn’t belong there.

Think of the most stereotypical drama queens and that was what I had for management. Just completely incompetent, talked down to employees, and enjoyed working each-other into frenzies over the littlest problems.

Most annoying thing was the store manager would bring out a list of shit for me to do and tell me to do things while I’m fucking doing it. “Dust the CCTV for me.” Standing on ladder with duster on CCTV “Uhhh right.” Luckily, she’d go back into her office and hopefully we wouldn’t see her anymore.

You can try talking to bosses and showing them through actions you aren’t a fucking idiot. Sometimes you just have to move to greener pastures though.

For any of the women who are reading and posting in this thread, how would you respond to the notion of using your “assets” to get a client of close a sale. I heard this today in a meeting and nearly fell out of my chair when I heard it. Is that not a sexual harrassment claim just brewing?

[quote]MaximusB wrote:
For any of the women who are reading and posting in this thread, how would you respond to the notion of using your “assets” to get a client of close a sale. I heard this today in a meeting and nearly fell out of my chair when I heard it. Is that not a sexual harrassment claim just brewing?[/quote]

Sexuality is present in the workplace. Men are men, women are women, whatever. The big problem is when the sex (in whatever form) is not welcomed.

Being asked to use your sexuality to advance a job goal is a Very Bad Idea. It creates a hostile work environment for the female and for everyone around her. That’s the sort of shit that gets people in big trouble. A lot of the older guys either don’t realize it isn’t kosher, or wager that the sweet young thing is too timid to do anything about it.

No matter what happens, her job is fucked. Either she will always be uncomfortable and worried that it will happen again, or she will say something and get fired and have to deal with a lawsuit she’ll probably lose and forever be branded a troublemaker.

Ick.

[quote]LIFTICVSMAXIMVS wrote:
pushmepullme wrote:
…that sort of environment destroys you.

Or it makes you become like them – which is almost the same thing isn’t it?

Better to quit and get out alive.[/quote]

Good point. The Senior Associate (at 59, he should’ve been a partner, but the asshole had his number for some reason) also worked at my current firm back in the day. Everyone here loved him - great guy, so kind, great daughters, so witty, etc.

After working with the asshole for ten years, he was a completely different fellow - cussing at the top of his lungs, throwing books, etc.

And he smelled bad, too.

How do you think they became boos in the first place?

D-baggery is FIRST requirement even before references and experience !

You best bet is to get out of there, your boss is the single most important factor in whether a job is tolerable.

Not money, not the job, it’s the boss that will make it unbearable.

Well, I work at Best Buy. So…

Yah. There’s a few.

[quote]SSC wrote:
Well, I work at Best Buy. So…

Yah. There’s a few.[/quote]

Amen to that
My general manager is a fucking twat fister from hell
Hes a stubby little fat guy who loves football and talks like he was some sort of star when he played… yeah… that guy.

[quote]MaximusB wrote:
I was wondering who here has a boss who is a total douche bag? I mean just a prick of a bastard. And if you do, how do you go about dealing with him/her? Please share[/quote]

Forget, one time, to pick up your paycheck. Get it a week or two later, as if you didn’t need it. Its your need of the money that he’s using as a weapon to rub shit in your face.

Many people in this world love to exert power over others. Unless you don’t need the job, he’ll continue to treat you poorly.

I treat the people in my department as if they were volunteers. Had too many assholes for bosses and could never do that to any one.

Keep hunting for a new job, in the mean time.

Most jobs just plain fucking suck. If I had to work under what most people do, I would seriously buy 40 acres somewhere and just survival farm. I am VERY lucky to be in my present circumstances.

I’m generally uncomfortable around most people (most tend to be irrational and unpredictable) and the thought of being at their mercy, for a paycheck, is awful.

I had a boss who screamed at me the words ‘you aint learnin nothin in school’

I just looked at him and said ‘I learned not to structure a sentence like that’ and walked away.

Realize you wont work for a douchebag forever and learn to laugh at him. There are a lot of douchebags in the world. Sometimes you work for one. That old saying what goes around comes around. It’s so true. Those douchebags usually get what’s coming to them.

[quote]eric_lacrosse wrote:
I had a boss who screamed at me the words ‘you aint learnin nothin in school’

I just looked at him and said ‘I learned not to structure a sentence like that’ and walked away.

Realize you wont work for a douchebag forever and learn to laugh at him. There are a lot of douchebags in the world. Sometimes you work for one. That old saying what goes around comes around. It’s so true. Those douchebags usually get what’s coming to them.[/quote]

Exactly. sometimes the only way to handle a Douchebag boss is to be a sarcastic little prick. out-douche them, but on your own terms, and only when they truly deserve it.

I’ve been at the same shitty job, part time for the last 3 years. My boss is an ass, but if you dish it right back in just the right way, he realizes he doesn’t get the effect he wants, and leaves you alone.

Shitty jobs like Best Buy and other “highschool-college dominated” jobs are filled with douchebag managers, pissed that the farthest their life took them was a “shift co-coordinator” job, managing smart ass college kids.

As for douche bosses in the real world… I guess I’ll figure it out when I get out there in it…:stuck_out_tongue:

[quote]SSC wrote:
Well, I work at Best Buy. So…

Yah. There’s a few.[/quote]

Oh suck it up “I” work at Wal~Fart.

Best Buy? HA! It can be worse.

play the game.

what I like to refer to as social engineering.
find out what your boss is into, learn a few things about that so you have something besides work to discuss. ask about the company’s goals and what employees in your position can do to help the company realize those goals. if you can get this motherfucker to respect you, even a little, when review time comes around you’ll be considered the top-performer (even if you aren’t).

and when the powers-that-be start looking for someone to move into a higher position and they pull the appraisals for review - bingo - you get out, make more money and if you feel like putting in the effort, you can probably “engineer” yourself into a position directly above your old boss and proceed to make his life a living hell.

(and yes I realize I’m a sick bastard).

except most of us arent looking to get into a position higher than our boss’ cause that would mean this place is now your career.

i was always afraid to take on more hours or put in too much effort at my old retail job because i didnt want to even start to imagine that being my “career”. i dont know how anyone can do that forever to be honest. i get drained out just from being under florescent lights for too long.

[quote]Steve8867 wrote:
SSC wrote:
Well, I work at Best Buy. So…

Yah. There’s a few.

Oh suck it up “I” work at Wal~Fart.

Best Buy? HA! It can be worse.
[/quote]

Didn’t realize it was a competition.