Hats for the Husky Gentleman


Hello T-Nation, I wanted to share a problem with you. You see, my friends and I have been “working out” for the past few months and we accidentally got pretty big. I ate McDonald’s a couple times a week, did a few sets of lunges and my sixpack was gone almost instantly, replaced by shuddering roll upon roll of BEEFCAKE.

This normally wouldn’t bother me, but it seems our craniums have grown in addition to our massive arms, chest and whatever other muscle groups there are. The only one who can fit into normal clothes now is me on the right. My friend in the middle is so big he outgrew his hair and he’s bald now.

That red cap you see me wearing? That’s not a beanie. It’s an extra large tarp from Kmart.

What can we do? Will we ever lead normal lives again, or are we forever condemned to buying just slightly bigger than the ones we currently wear?

My question is how does the guy in the middle buy size thirty pants?

I think HIIT should work for loosing the guts. You may be cone heads forever though.

Maybe you can try wearing one of those slimmer belts around your head in an attempt to sweat it off.

This is what i recommend.

k, bro just do like 100 situps and push ups everynite and some tabata shit, you’ll get all ripped and hawt easy even if you eat big macs sometimes its ok, too bad for you girls really hate big strong guys.

But seriously…

how YOU doin’…

See? That’s what happens when you listen to the guys that recommend squats and milk

Squat rack curls and Diet Coke. You’ll be hella swole in no time. Like dianab said, girls don’t like big strong guys. It’s all about the gunz.

Wear these. You’ve earned it.

[quote]FightingScott wrote:
Wear these. You’ve earned it.[/quote]

The Zubas or the shoulder pads?

Or both?

[quote]Stuntman Mike wrote:
FightingScott wrote:
Wear these. You’ve earned it.

The Zubas or the shoulder pads?

Or both?[/quote]

I say both. The shoulder pads will give the appearance of a smaller head and the pants are just plain awesome.

Dang, yall are big as hell. Its going to suck dieting all that fat off (theres no other way). It will most likely take you a whole year. Good thing you have tons of muscle under there.

Looks like you’ve started to build your ‘beach head’ some.

Seriously, you think girls just like bulging parietal bones? You really need to quit with the frat boy exercises and start to build up your frontal’s and occipital’s.

Sure it looks good with a hat on but what happens when you take it off? Your imbalances will make you look like a freak.

Big, strong guys? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww!

I say a spa wrap.

[quote]elano wrote:
Dang, yall are big as hell. Its going to suck dieting all that fat off (theres no other way). It will most likely take you a whole year. Good thing you have tons of muscle under there.[/quote]

Dude, I hope you’re kidding.

[quote]elano wrote:
Dang, yall are big as hell. Its going to suck dieting all that fat off (theres no other way). It will most likely take you a whole year. Good thing you have tons of muscle under there.[/quote]

I really want to know…you think any of those guys give a shit about their fucking ab muscles being visible?

One more question…does that make them any less impressive?

Maybe you were joking though and I missed it.

I cannot find jeans that fit my muscular legs.

I hate it when I work out a little bit, eat some mcdonalds, and get huge. It’s getting annoying.

http://www.T-Nation.com/free_online_forum/music_movies_girls_life/what_brand_of_jeans_are_best_for_muscular_legs?pageNo=2#2500615

Just in case anyone missed it the first time.

This thread is humorous.

[quote]ab_power wrote:
I hate it when I work out a little bit, eat some mcdonalds, and get huge. It’s getting annoying. [/quote]

Your fucking hawt. did you find those rainbow panty hose on teh worldwide interwebz? id like to get some for my mom for crhismas. pm me baby.