T Nation

Has Dating Changed in the Last 5 to 10 Years?


#1

I notice a change in dating since I started when I was 18 (2008). I feel like women were more approachable. I dont know if it is me (even though I was really socially awkward back then) or society has changed (maybe online dating is changing how people interact?) or maybe Im just getting sick of going out, but I find myself after these nights more confused on how to talk to women than when I was a virgin and never dated. I know that sounds strange coming from a 26 year old who’s had a few girlfriends, I find myself thinking about it more though. I talked with this about my friend and he agrees that dating has changed negatively (he is about to turn 29) in the last few years. I could give specific examples but Id just been rambling, so I figured Id reach out to my friends and enemies at T-Nation to see your takes.


#2

Go to country bar and slow dance not hard to slow dance can talk girl while dancing you’ll know with in a dance or two if your in their. Now people meet online never know what freak you will get, the best place I’ve met girls is at gym or grocery store look at what they buy if their are 5 gallons of milk and 5 loaves of bread prob family, dating has definitely changed .


#3

At 26 you are still young try being 43 and 290lbs and picking up strange, confidence is a great aphrodisiac, exuding it they will be coming for you.


#4

It sure has gotten complicated. I have to find places that my wife won’t go, make sure that they don’t have a friend of a friend in common- Facebook has fucked that up, bigtime. Sneaking out for a quickie at lunch is easy enough, but man, full on dates are crazy.

Almost not even worth it, really.

j/k! Haven’t dated since 2004, married since '07.


#5

All the 50+ yo guys here have 20 somethings hanging on them. None of them date women anywhere close to their age. That doesn’t leave much room for the 20 something guys. The girls want somebody that is already " established" .

I know I am old now, but seriously, when i was 25 I would not have jumped in bed with somebody older than my daddy. Sorry.


#6

I lost track once dick pics became a standard part of the process.


#7

If you are looking for a long term relationship, cast a wide net and just be yourself.


#8

I don’t think it has changed in a negative way, but it certainly has changed. If you don’t like the change or aren’t as good at the “new game” I can see how that is a problem.

I can tell you for certain, guys who have their shit together in their 20’s have no problem with girls. I also know plenty of girls looking for guys who aren’t douche’s looking for a one-night stand and have found respectufl guys because that is what they were looking for.


#9

[quote=“ChickenLittle, post:5, topic:220756, full:true”]
All the 50+ yo guys here have 20 somethings hanging on them. None of them date women anywhere close to their age.[/quote]

This isn’t true. In reality you only pay attention to who highly sexually attractive men date while average and below average men do not ping your radar.

Most 50+ yo guys still on the market do not date women in their 20’s and are incapable of attracting them even if they wanted to.

[quote=“ChickenLittle, post:5, topic:220756, full:true”]
That doesn’t leave much room for the 20 something guys. The girls want somebody that is already " established" . [/quote]

This is true to some extent but I don’t necessarily think it’s about being “established” in terms of career/money if that’s what you mean. It’s more than men in their 30’s are confident due to having achievements + experience with women while men in their 20s (especially in their early 20’s) are unsure of themselves.

With the nerdification of young men, I think older men who “get it” are becoming more attractive to young women. May-December relations will continue to grow more common IMO.


#10

^ shes right… For whatever reason I date lots of women mid early 20s Im 39… Its very easy… I use tinder and POF all the time. Young guys tend to be dipshits… Too many D pics and these ladies want someone a bit more mature… Its amazing how dumb some guys are. Im half a caveman and I do well… Most women just want to go out not be harrassed do fun things. Hence they like a guy with $$$ and some education…They will let you know through body language or verbal how they want the date to progress…
Yes 4 sho dating has changed… When I was in my 20’s it was about being social, smooth, and meeting women face to face… Had to go out 3+ times a week…Now I can sit at home holler at 20 different girls while watching TV eating a bag of funyons… No expensive dates… Personally I like it the web sites tend to match you up based on things you both like… Also you can get right to it because of the volume… Like hey Im down to party or looking for a relationship… Just watch out for catfish…Lots of fat chicks posing as hot chicks… Thats why I always do first dates for a drink or coffee. That way you can bail fast and cheap if shes a beast


#11

been stung by that a couple of times myself. Internet dating sites are chock full of sneaky fat chicks.


#12

I turn 'em all down.

FACE DOWN!


#13

^ haha LMAO

Hey one way to weed out the fatys is only contact chicks with full bod shots… Also in bio write " fitness is a big part of my life fitness minded ladies only" Its the politically correct way of saying “no fat chicks”

However I have to say the fat chicks are highly aggressive and love beef cake type dudes… Not saying I’d make one my bae but dont discount the quality BJ as only a fat girl can provide…jus sayin


#14

They always have food at the house


#15

If instagram is anything to go by, then fit-minded is no blockage to the fatties.


#16

She said men in their 50s not a 39 year old


#17

If you are in great shape, tall, have a decent face (haven’t aged badly) and put together a good profile you can get young women.

How many guys in their 50s are single and fit that description? If their bodies haven’t completely gotten to shit their faces have

You can’t compare your 30s to men in their 50s


#18

^ its all game bro… I got a good buddy hes 52 has a body like Gandi, balding, and constantly get hot women in 20s, 30s, 40s
Looks helps but game trumps looks any day… Also $$ women love $$$… For us normal bros its game and some gym work


#19

I guess personally, aside from looks, I find a lot of younger women uninteresting to talk too. At least I feel like I have to water myself down a lot when I go on dates. I tend to get along with older women (30s) much easier than people in their 20s. I dont think it helps that I am 26 but look like Im 16, at least in the face. But I suppose when I get divorced or never married when Im 50 and my balls dont work and everything is sagging Ill at least LOOK like im in my 30s and healthy!


#20

Even if dating didn’t change on a society level, the only way it wouldn’t change on a personal level is if you stayed the same person and continued to be part of the same activities and circles. Obviously that’s impossible.

Basically, as people get married, the singles’ scene changes/evaporates. So you either have to adjust to date women increasingly younger than yourself, get married, stop dating, or seek out the diminishing pool of women your age. None of those will be equivalent to dating women in highschool and college. So change is inevitable.