T Nation

Gym Tales

I train at home in my garage, I have no trouble with dedication/motivation and I love the convenience. The only thing I miss are the girls (god I love g-string leotards). I always love reading stories though of all the crazy/idiotic things people do in the gym. I’m sure all you regular gym goers out there have some great tales to tell of some of the truly stupid things you have seen people do. Maybe you just want to tell what frustrates you in general. Well here’s your chance whether you just want to make us laugh and shake our heads or you want to vent some of that pent up frustration before it lands you with an assault charge. Go to it.

I also work out at home, but I have recently joined the local YMCA for a couple months to work out at lunch, 5 minute drive. Every machine and barbell was full of weights (every fucking one of them). The mad search to find the missing match to a dumbbell is always a good warm-up. And to top it off I love removing 200 Lbs. of weight just to do a warm-up set. I would have been nice to find one matching set or a machine empty (clean). Oh well life can not be perfect and at least it fells like I am working out in some one’s smelly basement!

There is this clown in our gym, a big goofy lookin white guy, glasses, clown pants… Anyway, he brings in his own captains of crush grippers, and he stands in the middle of the gym, and squeezes it shut, and tries to hold it as long as possible. When he fatigues he begins screaming and wailing, and im not just talking a little strain, this guy is screamin loud so that half of the gym stops to look at him. Ive only seen him do it once or twice, but it definately happened.

I once saw a guy get on the machine dip at a gym I used to be the manager of. The machine’s seat was so low, and the guy was so short, that the handles were just a little lower than his shoulders. He grabbed them and tried to push UP! Obviously, he couldn’t, so he gets up, looks at the weight stack, lightens it, tries again, and of course the handles don’t move at all. This went on for quite awhile. I was laughing so hard that I had to wipe my tears away before I went over and explained that the handles on a machine dip go DOWN, not up.

There was quite a lengthy and very funny thread on this exact topic on the off topic forum a while back. It is definetly worth a look.