Goin to Winnipeg...




Pronounced “Win ih Peg”

Say it fast now, six times!

You got it!, well done. So what the fuck is up with Winnipeg you ask? Well, I just accepted a promotion in Winnipeg and as silly as it sounds one of my first thoughts when I was asked was “What about “my” cell”…sure moving Mrs. Cake, the Muffins, getting a new house, finding schools, enrolling Mrs. Cake in classes and walking into what has very accurately been described as a “shitshow” operationally in the next 4 weeks would keep most men preoccupied but not me.

I worry about my T-buddies and where I am going to work out.

While I will get back to Calgary a few times a year and will endeavour to have these times coincide with an Alberta T-Cell gathering, my need for local T-Cell connection will be high. I have never heard of anyone here mention Winnipeg but if there are any Lurkers from tha’ Peg now is the time to shout out!


Pretty Please?

Make a 'Cake a happy 'Cake…

“I wouldn’t say it’s cold, but every year Winnipeg’s athlete of the year is an ice fisherman”

~ Dale Tallon

Make sure to give US=good guys your forwarding address.

Hey, I’ll go with you. Got a spare room? Be prepared, I eat a lot. And I don’t mind sharing the shower with your wife. To save water of course.

Forgive me for not knowing, but is this closer to the West Edmonton Mall? Or further away? I like to buy stuff. What is you credit card number?

Oh yeah, when you were talking about your little muffins, I hope you were talking about your kids.

Cupcake!!! Now, I’m going to sound like a truly ignorant American when I ask this question.

How far is Winnipeg from Calgary?

The one other thing that really sucks, IMO, is that you are going from having an NHL team, to having NO NHL team. That stinks.

Best of luck to ya at your new job!!!

Jeff, Winnipeg ain’t too far for friends. I can see a road trip in the near future.

Congrats on the promotion, cakeman!

I got a promotion years ago that required relocation in about that time frame. You got your work cut out for you, buddy.

But fear not, because as you know, T-Nation has no geographical boundaries, so you can always come back here and get your fill of annoying and irrelevant posts.

Oh my god! You’re giving up Alberta for Manitoba?! All they have is flat. Flat land. Flat lakes. Flat women (okay I made that last one up).

When is this awful transition happening???


Will you be here for T3? If not we’ll make sure to have it before you go, because T3 will not be the same without you.

I think my heart is gonna break. I love Cupcake, especially with pink icing and sprinkles on top.

I don’t believe it.

After one night of passion, you’re leaving me?

For Winterpeg Manisnowba?

You brute. I let you pin me to the gym floor. I specifically “kept myself clean” for you.

And this is how you repay me?

I’m all torn up. (take that EXACTLY as you want).

Bless you Cake. I guess we’ll always have Paris.

dr. darcy

So you went and took it
I always knew you loved a challenge
you know you’ll have my support and assistance if you need it. Let me tell you brother Calgary and Alberta District are losing a very great person, Get out to Winnepeg and KICK ASS.

Hey guys, thanks for the support! While being missed is always good for the ego, the missing that I will be doing won’t be.

The good news is that I will be returning for as many T-events as possible, I have to figure at LEAST two a year…

The Bad news is that it looks like Winnipeg is a T-Desert at least until I get there and “spread the Disease”.

And yes, we will always have Paris.

“Goodbye Mr. Zanuck: it certainly has been a pleasure working at 16th Century Fox”

~ Jean Renoir


This is how I have to find out…on the forum? You could have called me you know. You can’t go. That’s it. Plain and simple. Who do I have to call to change all this nonsense? The Vixens need eye-candy too,… right girls?

You are an incredibly talented person, you will be missed by all your friends here in AB.


post script - don’t go…



Congratulations on the promotion.

Isn’t this always the wy it goes?

You meet someone

They have a great sense of humor

They like to have fun

They have the same intrests

The’re a GOD on the BBQ

Your just getting to know them and they move

(sigh) the story of my life

'Cake we want you at ALL of the T-Cell gatherings, no exceptions.

I’d wish you luck, but I think your positive attitude and your hard working personality will do better for you.

Good luck



Your nuts are gonna turn into icicles.

For the people asking where Winnipeg is in relation to Calgary, it’d probably be the equivalent of driving from Pittsburgh to Chicago. Probably a little less, but about 10 hours of driving.

I’m pretty sure.

Fact of the matter: you will no longer have testicles, you will have ice-ticles. Hahahahaha. I made that up myself.

Also, no more testosterone.


I’m so damn creative its disgusting.


Your Beautiful Wife and I have fallen in Love and our plan is to move to Truth or Consequences, New Mexico where we will craft a new life with each other using unabashed admiration for each other as a foundation to build our future.

Of course we will need some sustenance other than the emotional fodder supplied by love so I will become a world famous Baker ~ “Pastry by CAKE,” and Jac will open a pseudo-mystical head shop where local pot-heads and tourists alike may view and purchase cleverly disguised Molson Canadian bottles that will be sold as “Authentic Canadian Penguin Bongs”.

I realize that this is a sudden change of events for you, to ease the blow I have sent you my Big Screen T.V and will follow that with the delivery of my CD collection as soon as I strip it of all the CD’s that I actually like. That this will leave you with Supertramp, Megadeath and some band called “Them Damn Coyotes” (pronounced “ki Yootes”) should not diminish your enjoyment of them at all.

Even if it does, what am I going to care? I’m gonna be in New Mexico with your wife!

As far as geography goes, Winnipeg is directly north of Grand Forks, North Dakota about 12 hours east of Calgary. For those Americans who do not know where North Dakota is, shame on you and shame on Ms. Wilson your 5th grade geography teacher! I mean what the fuck were you doing in her class all that time? Obviously NOT learning about North America.

I suggest you go to her house immediately (224 Applegrove Lane) and slap her for the lousy education you suffered at her hands.

And once for me too.

“Nonsense and beauty have close connections”

~ E. M. Forster

'Cake, glad to hear that you’re going to Truth or Consequences. I’ve been through there and Elephant Butte Lake is beautiful this time of year.

Just watch out for the serial killers. . .


Late reply, I missed this thread- I’m in Winnipeg, we could use a T-Cell here like nobody’s business. Don’t know if you’ll catch this post or not, but if you do mail me at cabermcjock@hotmail.com and I’ll try to answer any questions you might have. Here’s the easy ones:

  1. Yes, the winters are cold. In fact, there are no metrpolitan centers of similar/greater size in the world colder than Winnipeg. But the summers are great.
  2. The mosquitos are BIG. if you have small pets (terriers, cats etc.) you may want to leave them at home- they’ll be carried off for sure.
  3. Winnipeg has, per capita, the highest proportion of HOT women anywhere. Seriously. It’s crazy.
  4. Gay-ass flame shirts are against the law. (kidding! It’s only a ticket.)

Good luck with your move.