T Nation

Girls, Girls, Girls

Well, lets start at the begining, for those of you who haven’t read my post in the Training/Nutrition forum…I was rear ended by a semi on saturday! There were five of us in the car comming back from a ISHA/ISOPHE confrence. My car was over heating due to a burst cooling hose. We had taped it up and were going to meet someone at the next exit so they could take us back to school (we didnt want to wait on the side of the road for fear of being hit ironically) It was raining and we were doing about 40-45, talkin have a good time then WHAM (the sound effect not the band) we flew across the highway into the ditch and almost into the west bound lane after the semi nailed us. BuffPac, got banged up, some nice whip lash, but other than that he’s ok, the guy behind him got 5 stitches n the back of his head, the girl next to him had glass pored down her back and in her hair which caused her to loose some nice tufts (of hair) and shes got some lower back soreness, the girl behind me (the driver) was shot forward at the asme time i was going back. She broke her jaw and cracked some teeth on the back of head which gave me a 5-6 inch gash and about 25-30 stitches. So thats my story, oh by the way I’m 19 so is buffpac and the girl who broke her jaw, the other guy is 24, and the other girl is 21. Okay now the delema…so when they were stitchen my up i was loosing alot of blood, ALOT. further more they couldn’t numb me up, they tried but to no avail, so the stitches hurt like hell. Remember the 21yr old girl, her name is Allison and she was there holding my hand, rubbing me, trying to help. I havent stopped thinking about her since i looked up and saw her smiling at me asking if i was okay. The next day we went to check out the car and try and get some of our stuff back, then went out to dinner, and yesterday she helped clean the blood out of my hair after i got to take my bandages off (pause for “aww, how romantic”). So what the problem right, you like her go for it! well here’s where it get complicated, shes got a boyfriend, they’ve been together 3mo, but the dudes a two faced prick! All please and thankyous in front of everyone then he stands on his high horse and judges her like hes carrying out the work of the All Mighty. “you swear, thats not christian…you don’t go to church 3 days a week, I don’t know if your the one for me…your hic-ups don’t sound like mine you should go to the hospital…ohh you were rear ended by a semi, well i’d like to come see you but i have a baseball game” No joke on any of his words. As for me, well i broke up with my girl friend in feb, because she cheated on me, only by kissing other guys, but 3 other guys, and she consistantly lied about it for a good 4mos! But I’m a shmo, i still talk to her and see her on the weekends, and we still have sex…i was planning on getting back together some time (I mean she is moving here next fall!). So i guess my question is, what do i do, who do i chase, is this thing with Allison just temporary, what would you do? oh by the way Allison only does cardio, and tone of it, and she doesnt eat right in my opinion, but shes got the most awesome muscles, i think she the Flex Wheeler myostatin gene, she just runs and shes got bi’s and tri’s and delts and her quads (woof woof) ahhhh! Well thanks for reading my novel, and thans for your thoughts. ScottyDog

I think u should do her in da butt.Yeah da butt.

Well, sorry to hear about your accident, but glad to hear that you all seem to be okay. As for the girl dilemma, it sounds to me as though you already know what you want to do, but just need someone to give you permission. So, by all means, go for Allison. She’ll let you know soon enough if there is some chemistry there or if it’s just the effect of the accident. And as far as her workouts go–what does that have to do with anything? People who do lots of cardio will often have little body fat (especially on the legs and upper body), hence showing their muscles. It doesn’t necessarily mean they are developed, just evident.

Well, Scotty, interesting story. Man, that sucks (the car wreck and injuries). As for Allison, it may have meant nothing in her eyes. Question for you – have you been friends for a while? It may be just some endorphin enduced effects that you’re seeing her in a different light. Do you have clues that she’s feeling anything for you? And as for your ex, man, all I gotta say is that a break-up needs to be complete (as in no sex, it’s okay to remain friends), or there’s always gonna be trouble.

Hows it goin everyone? I’m feeling better today, my neck doesnt hurt that much anymore, what ever. To brock, thats down the road a bit, but i’ll post when it happens. To GM, thanks for the concern, your right, is is really good we all got away with such minor injuries…Always wear your seatbelts! Your right about Allison…so your advice is to sit back for awhile and see which direction the wind takes us so to speak? Oh just to complicate things a litle more, she’s staying here for summer school and i’m going back home so we’ll be about 3hrs from each other (and thats driving, but i don’t have a car). And as for the cardio thing, it really has nothing to do with anything, i was just thinking about it at the time, but seriously her muscles are huge, her quads just bust out, i dunno maybe it is an optical illusion, but i like it. To Brider, It does suck, but it coulda been worse. As far as me and Allison, we’ve always had a class together since we both came to school here, we’ve been class room friends, and hallway friends, but never did anything together till this trip. Which by the way rocked, we had suck a great time together pre accident, talked about alot of stuff, learned some pretty personal info on each other, she’s a real sweetheart. As fa as clues go, let first preface this with saying I suck at seeing signs, I take all the wrong things as signs and ignore the real stuff. That said, we have spent some time together, and we’ve been talking on the phone. Been showing pictures to each other and just kinda chillin together. at the same time though, i met her boyfriend. and yesterday, when i didnt call her, she didn’t call me. Today, we’re supposed to get together to buy a card and flowers for Amanda ( the girl who broke her jaw) and we’re planning on visiting her soon, and spending the night at Allisons place. But i do get these looks from her, just like really caring looks. I dont know what all it means, maybe i’ll just give it some time. Thanks to all of you. I’ll keep you posted. ScottyDog

chicks are nurturers (and doods are too aswelleth) so no suprise at seeing the nurturing looks from her. How do you turn that nurturing affection into hot steamy low bodyfat and toned muscle sexual healing? I don’t know… Perhaps tell her that your head hurts and you need sexual healing? Maybe… umm I’d use that as a last resort.

Well, with all of that further clarification it sounds as though you both are kind of interested, but you both are not sure how to proceed, or even if you should proceed–a lot of uncertainty on both your parts. Taking it easy is a good idea as long as that doesn’t get mistaken for a lack of interest. Sometimes people just wait too long to make their move and then the other party interprets that as disinterest, rather than the uncertainty that it really is.I know two people who are in the exact same situation right now. They have both been “interested” in each other for 5 to 6 years. They drift towards each other and always drift away before they give a relationship a real shot. Everyone they know thinks they are perfect for each other, and I think they think so too, but for some reason are afraid to take that step.So, instead, they see other people, drift towards one another, then show indifference and the cycle begins again. It is so incredibly frustrating! IF you think you are truly interested, and IF you think she might be somewhat interested, create opportunities to hang out, to go out for a coffee or a chat–nothing threatening or overly obvious. Her eagerness to join you on these “chillin’” outings should be enough indication of interest. If she isn’t interested, she won’t be available as often as you might like. You know, it could be the age thing too. Didn’t you say she was 21 and you are 19? If that’s correct, she may be trying to sort out the fact that she is older than you. Anyways, good luck, and let us know!

How about just being honest and open about it? Just tell her “I’m seeing some signs here and I just don’t know how or if to proceed.” Then see where it goes.

okay, just got off the phone with Allison and my hearts racing. Turns out monday after she and her boyfriend had taken me back to my dorm he went off about how he thinks that we’ve been fooling around, which we haven’t, i wouldnt do that to anybody, I’ve been cheated on and its none to pleasurable…so i would never be the other guy. But anyhow, he’s mad because he says we’re perfect for each other, we do have alot of things in common…so here i am thinking ‘man is this a sign?’ then she says she had to keep reasuring him that we’re just friends…so is it a sign. Ladies, I’m lookin in your direction to desipher this mysterois language. I’m goin over there in like 30-45min…what evers goin on i feel good. Thanks everyone, this is fun! ScottyDog

I wish you all the best. However, if she was reassuring him about you two, it may be a sign but not a good one. As long as they are together, you should stay away from that girl, no matter how much you like her. Trust me on this one, I think I specialized in this area recently. I think that both guys and girls sometimes misinterpret other party involved, and since you two were in a stressful situation, God knows where is the truth. Be alert, but don’t push anything. Good luck once again.

She reassured her guy that you two are just friends, because at this point that’s all there is. No, she is not going to say to her bf that she is interested in you until she knows that you are interested in her. This scenario played out with an acquaintance of mine not too long ago. She was involved with someone and met another guy. She and the other guy became “good friends” who liked to chill together. This other guy began to really fall for this girl and let her know in subtle ways that he wanted her. It took the girl a few weeks to sort things out in her head, but in the end she went for the new guy because she had more fun with him. Currently they are inseperable and madly in love! The girl is being cautious because she doesn’t know where you are coming from and maybe is still working through her own feelings. Take it slow, but steady. Don’t push too much or you’ll scare her, but don’t hold back too much either, or she’ll think you aren’t interested. Sounds like you’re enjoying yourself here!

I read all of these posts and I just had to put in my .02 cents worth. My brother in law went through a similar situation as yourself with the girl being with another guy. She ended up dumping the other guy and they are still together after 03 years. In your case, this is what I think. Allison likes you and you like her. I think she is looking for a reason to break up with her boyfriend but she is the one who does not want to cause the breakup but she is going to. Her boyfriend has already expressed he does not like it. If she really wanted to be with him, she would not call you and complain and then go out with you. She would call and tell you that she cannot see you anymore or you guys need to chill out a little. This is not what happened. She is making it look as if the other guy is being unreasonable because you and her are just “friends” and she is letting you know about it. Tell me women are not sneaky. Tell me that you would not be pissed off if it were you that was her boyfriend and she was just friends with some other guy under these circumstances. Guys are territorial and this guy knows that you want his girl as innocent as everyone is making it seem it is not. This is a game and I have played it many times while growing up. You want her, just keep being sympathetic and the boyfriend will either beat your ass and she will break up with him or he will get tired of her games and break up with her and then she will come to you on the rebound which is what she really wants anyways. It is a viscious game to be playing but it can be won if you keep being the sympathetic person. Bye the way, get a lawyer for that accident you are entitled to compensation as well as the occupants of your car.

Plain and simple. You say ‘Ever since the accident(and other stated situations) I can’t stop thinking of you and I wanted to know if you felt the same.’ You can say something about it being fate , but I would just feed of of her. If she says anything about the guy she is with, don’t trash him, just tell her that you don’t think he is right for her, and you want a chance. They have only been together 3 months. You never know until you try.

Man, I am in such a great mood! Just wanted to give a little update to the situation. Went shopping for a card with her yesterday, and we spent a good time talking about things, her and her boyfiend go into another fight yesterday because she has two tattoos, and he thinks they’re trashy and not christian like. Then we went back to her place and continued to talk just about things…she eventually went had to start studying for her finals, but said i could stay if i wanted too, so of course i did. she went to type a essay, and stayed in the other room cause i didnt want to bother her, but i couldn’t stay away, so went to bother her. She showed me some pictures of when she went on alternative spring break and helped paint stuff for this ranch for abandond girls…she such a great girl! then she started typing again, and i put my hand on her shoulder and said i’ll be in the next room…and she stopped me and asked for a back rub. I’m really fallin hard for her! So, I admitted to myself i like her, and the majority of my body says she has some feelings back, but theres still that part of me that thinks she just see’s me as a friend and this is just the way she acts (but its a really small part). I guess, the biggest problem i have is that i’ve turned into the guy i hate…you know that guy your girl is “friends” with, and you know that the other guy likes your girl, but you can’t do anything because she’s allowed to have friends? That’s me! i’m pretty sure that her boyfriend doesn’t like me much, i just feel like a bit of a prick (just a bit though). So who knows whats going on. well, so far we’ve always been doing stuff related to the crash, so i guess today i’ll just ask if she wants to do something. I would like to end this update by thanking everyone, whos contributed…you help and concern just shows how great this small community of t-maggers are. Thanks again, dont stopp with the advice…I’m enjoying it. ScottyDog

Ok, let me give you my 2 cents now. I have been that other guy, the asshole boyfriend. Boy you are going to like this story. Anyway, this kid she worked with started really comin’ on to her, and she said they were just friends and what not, so I just grinned and beared it. I was a big pussy back then, but I was also getting some so thats probably why. But then we broke up in the fall after she went away to college and that was that. That kid that she was friends with went psycho calling her 10 times a day and was waiting on her porch when she got home from school one day, tryin’ to get with her. So she stopped talking to him and that’s all I know. Then just a few weeks ago I got back with her for a couple weeks, thought it was somethin good, but then she dumps me for no reason(that she gave me anyway.) Well, it turns out this kid that she had been friends with had told one of her friends that he wanted to get his stuff back, and she decided to dump me and get with him. So the moral of the story is, if you don’t get her now, just have patience and just maybe you’ll get her when you least expect it.

Well, seeing as we are sharing stories here. I have been on both ends of the situation. I have been the “Friend” and the “boyfriend” You cannot get any friendlier than fucking her so go ahead and do it, you know you want to. The boyfriend is not even in the picture anymore because he is arguing over stupid shit like tattooes. Tell her you think tattooes are really sexy and ask to see them. I think you need to give her a little kiss on the back of the neck next time she asks for a back rub. Yeah, ScottyDogg, rub her back alright. Just make sure you are rubbing it the right way! Let us know when you light the candle.

ru12nvme your crackin me up. As much as I’d like to count out FuckFace (her boyfriend), it’s because of him that this whole affair has moved into hyperdrive. He’s graduating saturday, and leaving for Indianapolis sunday! Sounds great at first cause he’ll be gone, but the trouble is I’m leaving saturday! Whats worse is that since he’s leaving sunday, he’s trying to get as much time with her as possible and she is of course going along with it all because he IS leaving and she has a current comitment to HIM, where as our feelings are still unspoken. I swear he planned it! But, on the bright side, I think i got a big hint today…she had just mentioned him leaving for his internship when she mentioned the fact that he might meet someone else while their, after which i said i’m sure he wouldnt cheat on you, to which she replied he wouldn’t and if he does meet someone else, i might too. Okay, so I’m really reading ito things here, just let me have my moment, and ru12nvme i’ll try and work that neck kiss in, but what do you mean by rubbing it the right way? I like all this story sharing and advice, lets keep it comming. Thanks again, ScottyDog

bro speaking with 5billion years of evolutionary experience and being able to plug myself into the very nature that makes us what we are I say with all the backing of evil unseen powers to go for it. Don’t worry about being that jerk that steals her, she’s not married, he’s a dork. Think of it this way if there were only 2 doods on a planet and 1 chick and the 1 dood was a wuss and you were strong what would you do? would you let this wuss repopulate the earth with wussies thus leading to the eventual conquering of humanity by aliens? or worse damned dirty apes? HELL NO! IS SAY SAVE HUMANITY AND DO HER LIKE SHE’S NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE! DO IT FOR AMERICA! DO IT TO FIGHT TERRORISM!

HINT?!?!?!?! Man, how much more of a 2-by-4 do you need? Get it out in the open already!

I say he is out of the picture. It is only a matter of time. Things always have a way of working things out. Like I said it is all part of the game. She has to spend some time with him otherwise it makes her look like the bitch and gives him a reason. Women like being pursued. How many friends you got that let you rub their back or even ask for it? I tell you what, if it were me and this chick is good looking then she would have been hobbling out of that room. I would make a few new holes in her body for her. Now, you cannot get any more friendlier than that now can you? When I say make sure you rub her right. I mean slip her the man meat, give her the big Kielbasa, the schlong, penis, drill her like an Arab looking for oil. Smack her upside the head with that package of yours and say, “This is what you really want, fuck you back rub, get your clothes off.” I think she would like this approach. It never hurts to try. Afterall you have not put any moves on her yet. Better start before someone else does. Let us know when you slide the salami.